Emotional, Mental, and Physically Worn Out?

I too have been going through all of the things every princess has been going through on here. My mom gave me the most key piece of info I could ever recieve.
I was an emotional mess and my mom rather bluntly said, "You know, maybe you are just so used to feeling bad, that you don't know how to feel good"??? At first I was like WHAT??? It took me some time to wrap my mind around that concept considering how uncaring that sounded at the moment. But you know what, I think she had something.
Like many ladies on here about the 3rd day after surgery I hit a brick wall. My emotions went NUTS and my mind went into over drive. I had panic attacks which caused 6 visits to the ER, heart tests, blood tests, etc... and you know what I was fine. I started hormones only to find that one didn't work for me. I had this uncontrolable fear that I was going to die. I was terrified of blood clots. I was a MESS. Well not to say that some days, I don't still have my moments. I am still like, WHAT IS THIS PAIN, WHAT IS THAT, WHERE DID THIS COME FROM, DANG I WAS FEELING SO GOOD..WHAT NOW, and the list goes on and on. But what my mom said makes sense. I had severe endometriosis, cysts, polycystic ovarian syndrome, estrogen dominance. Basically my reproductive system was BEGGING to be kicked out for years...lol It all started when I was 21 and just progressivly got worse as time went on. I tried different things as all women I am sure do to no avail. It had taken my quality of life even before the hysterectomy. I was tired all the time, I gained weight and couldn't lose it, my breasts were so swollen that it was uncomfortable for me to wear a bra, I bleed heavily and cramped horribly, sex was good...but who knew when I was going to spot or gush, and the list goes on and on. I think that since surgery I have been so focused on what is going on now, that I have forgotten to THANK GOD that I am not where I was. I spent years feeling yucky, that you know, I may not know how to feel right, GOOD, EVEN WHEN I DO....lol
All surgeries are different meaning longer or shorter healing times. All pains are different. All hormones and situations are different, but the experience is still the same. Maybe we all are used to feeling so crappy that when we do feel the "change of surgery" we are still in the mindset of "What next"! I can definatly say that is where I have been before and since surgery. Instead of focusing on how much better we actually do feel, instead we focus on the pain, emotional side effects from instant drops in hormones, what we need to be watching for, every twitch, pain, twinge, etc praying that something is not wrong....just like we used to do before we had surgery. I am in no way saying that these feelings are not valid, TRUST ME I am right there with you all, but what if we did change our mind sets to what we don't have to go through anymore??? It is in fact going to take times for our bodies to heal, time to get adjusted to hormones, emotions that we are not used to, but in time, this to will pass... In time we will feel 100% again, normal. We didn't get to the point of surgery over night, we definatly aren't going to get to normal over night, and for some of us, we have delt with the pain and being miserable for so long, maybe we are going to have to figure out what is "normal" for us, what is being ok? What is feeling ok?
I hope this helps. I am sending love to all my sisters. This to shall pass and WE WILL OVERCOME THIS!

Hi snowpea77!

Your mother sounds like a very wise lady, in my opinion.

It took me over a year to feel better after my surgery, and mine was a "textbook" case. From posts I have read on the site through the last several years, I have learned that my "time line" for recovery was not unusual at all. It seems to me that most hysterectomy patients encounter a certain share of "bumps in the road" in their early post-hyst life, and it takes most of us "longer than we would like" to feel like ourselves again.

You are still very early in the final bend of the path on your journey to good health. I hope that the days ahead just keep getting better and better for you!

Many s and Best Wishes,