Can they really understand?

Just a quick thought, my obgyn was a man, very nice man and whom I trust. But when I started crying in his office he refered me to behavoiral health, which I am wanting to go see. But...I so wonder if alot of what I am feeling is hormonal? or what, My ob/gyn seemed to think it wasnt since I still have my ovaries. Can a man really understand what a women is going through? What do you think? I no being a ob/gyn he has to have some knowledge, but ... can he really know.

I've encountered many women that "don't get it". In fact my worst experience with a dr. was a female ob/gyn. I don't think lack of understanding or insensitivity is gender-specific.

I think many/most male drs try to know what you're going through and hopefully have developed some compassion and common sense to be aware. They can't have empathy because they'll never have the problems a woman will, but they can certainly try to understand.

I've only had 2 appts. with my ob/gyn that I haven't been crying! He's been really good about it and has tried to "fix" everything for me. On the 2 occasions I haven't been bawling, he appeared relieved for sure!

My dr. said we need to wait at least a couple months to see if my ovary is functioning normally. It takes time for the GA and pain meds to leave our systems. Also, the trauma from surgery causes hormones to fluctuate.

I have to agree that it's not always gender specific. There are plenty of women out there who think PMS or PMDD is not real or who have never suffered more than a twinge of cramps on occasion and have accused me of being overly dramatic about it. When I suddenly gained 40 lbs in a month, it was because I must have been on a major eating binge - 'til they found the hormone problems that lead to a PCOS diagnosis.
My main health care provider is a female NP. I had to see the gyn in the practice for the surgery and despite years and years of journaling the experiences I've had with mood stuff and other issues like acne, etc. he still made sure to tell me that mood disorders exist in people without it being a hormonal cause.
I get pleasure in knowing I was right. I've never felt more stable and the constant pain I had is gone. Of course I still have surgical pain, but that's going away. Since the path report of adeno came back, my gyn has become a lot more sympathetic to my issues.

Personally, I think the right PERSON in the right job is what matters. Some people are not in the right field and that is a crying shame. I sometimes want to say "why are you doing this for a living? You obviously are not happy in it or very good at it". But I don't say it. I think my gyn is a gift from God. If nothing else, he simply has the talent to make you feel better no matter how bad you are feeling at the moment. That's something born in a person. My general doctor is from Bosnia, where she was a gyn. She is also very positive and funny and it is very nice to have a GP that knows the woman side of things medically. Her clinic is affliliated wtih my gyn clinic. It is so nice that whether I go for a hang nail or what, they have ALL my info right there - in case it is related they can see it. I have SOOOOO lucked out in the doctor world I can't even believe it.

My Surgeon was a man and he never ceased to amaze me at how 'switched on' he was ... thought of things I hadn't thought of ... had an answer for everything ... always gave me 'both sides of the coin' ... etc, etc ... I miss him!

I've come across many women who think they understand ~ just because they're a woman ~ when they don't have a clue ...

Maybe, by referring you, he thought they could help you more than he could?

Do you actually have any signs that your ovaries aren't working properly? For example ... hot flashes or night sweats? General tiredness and aching joints is another sign. But it's a long list!

It's still early-ish days for you ... my ovaries didn't co-operate for a couple of months.

Kichie...I so agree with your statement that it's the right person for the job that counts...not so much the gender. It's more important to me how I am treated, than whether or not that person has experienced it or not. I too have had some female docs that made me feel so stupid and that were just plain rude and I've had some male docs that were not exactly sure what I was experiencing but were willing to listen and try to help solve the problem.

But there have been times, especially recently (I have a male gyn)that I have wondered if it wouldn't be better to find a female gyn as I try to sort out this hormone jungle I am in. One that has experienced menopause herself would be even better! All the textbooks in the world on a subject can not compare to real life experience. My male doctor was like "well, you'll just have some hot flashes and night sweats" like it's no big deal. Oh my goodness...for me it was a huge deal! That first hot flash left me in a panic at what was happening to my body. My first night sweat was just as bad. I was drenched and awake at a time of night I shouldn't be awake at leaving me exhausted and grumpy the next day. The mood swings, brain fog, and insomnia were not even addressed by my doctor as to what I should expect. But these things are just as bad, if not worse than the flashes.

But, I suppose there are some male doctors who do a fabulous job of getting women balanced after surgery. So, I guess it really does go back to the "right person for the job" There are just many people doing the job as gyn who really should be doing something else. I guess we just have to keep looking until we find a gyn who abosolutely loves what he/she does and takes the time to continue to educate him or herself on all matters that pertain to women's health.

Sometimes I wonder if women should consult an endocrinologist for hormone imbalance! After all gyn's are more about the bits and pieces really.