Why does no one understand????

Why is it no one seems to understand how I feel??? My sil is my best friend and whenever the surgery is brought up she keeps telling me that I need to wait. I want more children, but my uterus can't handle having another one. Is that so hard to understand???

Why has my mom stopped talking to me??? I know she doesn't like talking about "private" issues, but to just not call me anymore is ridiculous. She just had this two years ago, she could help some. No, she chooses to think only of herself.

My husband is trying his hardest. He knows that this is really bothering me. He even let me sign up for a cake decorating class that I have wanted to take. I'm hoping it will make the time pass faster.

I'm just tired of people telling me that I need to wait and do this after I have another baby. I CAN'T HAVE ANYMORE BABIES!!!!! Even if I don't have this surgery, I can't have anymore kids. GRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!

Sorry, I'm just getting tired of no one understanding this.

. Not sure how to help you out, but wanted to send you a cyber . People can be very irritating during this period of time. Take strength from your husband, and yourself. You know why you are doing this, you aren't doing it for the fun of it, you are doing it because you have to. Eventually they will come around. Maybe they think by telling you to wait and try to do the impossible, they are helping in some way. They may not really understand your inability to have a child. I hope you can find some peace, comfort and understanding from those closest to you.

First and another
Your not so dear SIL would have to admit that you are worse off then her; and that this operation will make you different then her in a way she can't understand. After all not having kids I can't understand what some of you ladies felt being pregnant. She can't understand your pain that you are feeling now.
Moms; well moms are weird that way. In her eyes you might be her baby and she knows the risk involved. She might be scared and if by not calling you, that might mean she doesn't have to face your surgery any sooner than she can help it.

First off, I am so sorry to hear what is happening....I am 4wks post-op, and I hope that what I am about to say may help even a little.
I was told after my second child that I could not have any more babies, and it is only by the grace of god that I carried her to term. It absolutly destroyed me, and I felt less of a woman because I couldn't have any more. (she is now 8 1/2)....anyways surgery has been on the table for many years, and I always had my doubts, but my last straw was being stuck in bed on Christmas, and not being able to spend it with my family. I am the only woman in my entire family, to have this done, and honestly no one understood. My mom took a few steps back too, and I thought she was upset, but during that time she was gathering info for herself....she's a nurse, but she needed to understand it herself before she could help me. I think it is great that your husband is there for you, as some of us do not have that....You need to do what is goin to be best for your health and to make your life as pain free as possible so u can enjoy your little one. It was best said to me that a womens heart and strength are what defines her, not a desiesed uterus....your in my prayers, and good luck.

princess_franks, for some reason there is always one or two people in our lives who "think" they know what is best for us. Your situation sounds a little like mine. I had my fair share of people who said the exact same thing. I was lucky however to have my mom's advice and I will share with you what she said to me. She said : why in the world would I choose to stay in pain, when I know I can't change waht is wrong with my cervix and uterus" She too had a hyst and so it helped to hear that I needed to do what was right for ME! And that is what you need to worry about, you and only you. No one knows how you feel but you and I know that people mean well with many of the things they say but if they haven't been there then they really just do not know. I am about 3 weeks post-op and I feel so much better. I am dealing with the never having anymore children...but I would have had to deal with that reguardless if I had surgery. ANd the bonus is I don't have to have the pain nor the periods anymore.

Just remember that you are doing what you are doing for your life to be better! This is about you and your body. And remember that we are all here for you, so many of us gals understand exactly where you are coming from! Good Luck

please remember that you cannot change other people as much as we all wish we could. What you can change is how you react to them. Your mom probably is having a hard time understanding that you are having to go through this and that in turn may make her think that she is getting older and who likes to acknowledge that. Congrats for having an understanding husband

I was never happy over the fact that I could not have children, and I wasn't happy that I needed to have a hysterectomy, but early in the process, I decided that it was a great thing that I had the surgery otion available to me (many women just suffer for years from all kinds of GYN troubles) and that this was a GOOD thing for me. I just communicated that to everyone I knew, so no one had a chance to say a discouraging word to me, I just would not let them. I also did not even tell my mother about the surgery until it was over (she lives far away from me) because I decided I didn't need to hear her lamintations on the subject. Just accent the positive as much as you can. If your SIL is ever in a similar situation and she decides to wait, then that would be the right choice for her, not you.