ready to start feeling better-but When?

I had a total hyster. in Nov (ovaries and all) and it has been a nite mare ever since. I was expecting to feel better than what I am. I have terrible mood swings at my children and my husband. I get my backaches and feel bloated when it is getting close to when my period should have been. I am either always feeling like I could cry or that I am lashing out at whom evr is around. I can't remember anything. This has been a night mare. My husband and I both wish I (we) wouldn't have done this. But it was the final option, I had 4 laproscopies and 4 c-sections, I hade sevre endo. I feel so awful for my children and they can say anything and it could be the wrong thing. That is what makes me cry the most. I have been on premeran and didn't feel it was doing anything fo rme, then switched me to estrate(?) that hasn't done anything to me but put on some weight. I have problems with that also. I have always been very small and was very alert on putting on any extra weight. Now I have put on 10lbs and am starting to think that starving my self may be the best answer. I have been reading some of these columns and have felt alone until today when I found this web site.

I am sorry for all the rambling, I have had so much to say to anyone that could understand and that has been nobody for 4 1/2 months.

Is this ever going to get any better? I keep asking my doctor to do a blood test to see where my hormone levels are and he doesn't see a need. I did the surgery to feel better and so far it has been only worse. He just wants to keep switching my medicine without even seeing me. I can't even stand myself. Everyday I feel sorry for my children. Anybody with any advice??? PLEASE HELP ME.

Sorry about this. it's one nightmare I have feared, I hope you wake up soon. I say, FIND ANOTHER DR!! There are family physicians out there who may be better able to help you. I read on this site somewhere ( I think the hormone jungle area) that reproductive endocrinologists are the actual specialists in this area. Lots of women here also have written about hormone creams/gels/patches being more effective than oral HRT. I personally really hope I never need it, I fear I would be difficult to regulate also. The pills/patches/rings that my dr and I have tried to control my periods over the last 6 years always made me feel not myself. I actually had the hormones change my tastes in food and the natural smells that my body had changed. As it stands now I am on wellbutrin to help even out the moods and dumpy feelings I get. It has been effective so far.....
Good luck to you!

Hi,
I have not had my surgery yet, but I can relate to what you're going through. I feel so bad about myself when I yell at my son because I am in pain or my hormones are messed up! I know he doesn't understand. My own mother went through this when I was little, and I remember thinking she was so crazy...and she was! But she couldn't help it, and neither can you.

Be loving to yourself, and take good care of yourself first so you can take care of your children. Hire lots of babysitters!! Even if it means making financial sacrifices or making your partner help out extra you need extra time to yourself right now until your hormones get balanced. It's just not healthy for you or your children for you to try to constantly care for them, and be trying to control out of control hormones. I have worked in childcare for 13 years, and I know your children would prefer a babysitter while you get healthy to you trying to do too much. Having less frequent time with your children that is meaningful and happy is better for them than being with them constantly but yelling at them and being unhappy all the time.

I would get a new dr. who listens to you better, too, and is more available to see you. Finding the right balance of hormones can be super hard...this is your life we're talking about!

Don't give up. You are worth it, and you've come so far! It's just a matter of fine tuning the hormones now.

Take care and be well.

I think you need to see another dr that is willing to check your hormone levels and to tell them exactly how you are feeling. Your family will understand. They know this is not the real you. I hope you start to feel better soon. Take care.

I just want to apologize if my last post sounded too preachy. It was my first time posting anything, as I am new to this group. My heart goes out to you and your family, and I just wanted you to know that it's o.k. to be this way. I think the last person said it best when she said your family understands this isn't the real you. I'm sorry if I sounded insensitive.