thank you to my uterus (childbirth mentioned)

Today is my last day with my uterus. I want to say goodbye and thank you to her.

Although I am intellectually confident in my decision, I am experiencing a loss. I've always had "female trouble" (ovarian cysts and fibroids) and was told I would never had children when I was 17. Well, that proved to be a false proclaimation! I had three children and birthed at home, in my own bed to boot. My uterus did a good job raising those babies until I held them in my arms and I am humbled and grateful for her service.

But, it is time to say good bye now. The last year has been difficult for me and family. I have spent more time on the couch with a heating pad than outside playing. I have trips to the DR and the ER. I have had to postpone plans and cancel parties. I have had vacations ruined. I have become a woman just trying to get through the day, the week, the month, the year. I have been in pain and depressed and it is time to move on. I want to be so much more than I am now.

I am looking at my surgery as a trade. I am giving away something very precious to me - my uterus, my ovaries, my cervix- to gain something even more magnificent. I am gaining time, health, power and joy.

I know some ladies here are may not understand these feelings or this attachement. We all have a different path to walk and different feelings on it. I am grateful to have found a tribe of women who have walked this path before me. I have learned much here. Thank you.

But as for my uterus, I want to thank her too. I am ready for life without her but, strange as it sounds, I will miss her too.

That is so how I feel, I gave birth to 3 healthy beautiful daughters. I am so thankful that I was able to do that. I am having some issues with loosing her too, but know that I will feel powerful in my life as a woman to not have the pain and depression that comes with it. I want to spend time WITH my children.

Good Luck tomorrow!

Hi

I think there are many of us who have experienced what you are describing. As women, we are joined together when it comes to our "womanhood" and losing a part of ourselves that represents such an important and cherished part of our lives.

Five years ago, a few weeks before my hyst, I posted about feeling grief over losing my uterus, and their were so many comforting replies on that thread:

http://www.hystersisters.com/vb2/showthread.php?t=62269


One of my favorite replies from that thread was/is:

	Quote:
I think the loss is about what we've already known and what might still have been. It's a connection to our sisterhood as women - to our mothers and to our grandmothers and to the continuation of a legacy of nurturing and creating life. We still have a million other things to offer, but nonetheless, for me, anyway, there is still a sense of loss.

Be gentle with yourself during this time of healing.

's

Thank you for this post. I also have three children and although I have difficult pregnancies, I thank god every day for them. I still think about well.. what IF we wanted another but I know myself and I know my patience is thin at this point in time and there is no way I would go through everything again. It would be too risky for myself and a baby. But it is still a bit depressing to know that opportunity will never present itself again, no matter what my opinion becomes. I am so grateful I had my children, I can't imagine what the women who haven't are going through with this same decision. I know I am a lucky one. Thank you for your post. It is a little reassuring that there are others going through the same emotions.

I too mourn my uterus, yet are thankful for the 2 beautiful daughters given to me, also for my 2 gorgeous step children who I am fortunate enough to be primarily raising.
I am sad and disappointed that I will not share the wonder of a child from conception with my husband as it has been my dream since we committed to each other. He doesn't share this dream so doesn't understand the significance of the loss.
I feel so selfish knowing so many women never have the opportunity to have a child despite every attempt they make and for them too I mourn!
People say 'you should be pleased, it's only a uterus'- I feel my uterus was my centre; days will become brighter and knowing hyperplasic cells have been removed with it reminds me of the gift of life. I intend to pray on it, give lovingly to those in need and remember to be oh, so thankful for all that I have.

Thankyou ladies for all this site is teaching me

Well now you sure know how to make a woman cry.....I just posted in the pre op forum about how lately I tend to replay my children's birth in my head. Beautiful sweet moments and times that make me know how strong I can be as a woman. I am also fed up.... tired of not going places and always being tired, my boss wanting me to get moving. So I will join you in a goodbye to a uterus that served me so well, but to whom I am willing to part ways

Very well said!

Hi Ladies,
As I try to type with tears running down my face. It hit me yesterday afternoon and feel so sad. (3wks 2 days recovery) I have been blessed with two children. I had many problems before, during, and after my children. I remember having numerous trips to have ultrasounds to find what was wrong with me. After years of numerous busted cysts and period from "down under" I had two separate ultrasounds to find what was going on. I was told by my family doctor that I had adenomyosis and needed to see a women's health specialist. At the time I couldn't even sound the word out, let alone know what it was. So, I procrastinated for 1 1/2 yrs before going to see the specialist. Finally when I went the Dr. she explained to me what it was and told me about the the surgery.During surgery the DR found endometriosis on the left ovary and we're hoping after burning it off the ovary recovers. Already knowing that having another child would cause more pain and possibly other medical problems, along with the fact that hubby was "fixed", I was ok with my decision. However, coming from a women who wanted at least 10 kids I find my self saddened. Why am I feeling this way. I am a 27yr old women with a handsome 11yr old son and a beautiful 7yr old daughter and a great husband whom I shared the past 13yrs with. What more could I ask for, why do I feel the way I do and why now.

Dear Blooming Rose

I am now at 5wks 2days post op and the overwhelming sadness is leaving- I stood outside in the sunshine and gave true thanks for all that I am and all that I have. I cuddled my dog and cried, came inside and cuddled the cat and cried some more. Called my friend who has lost all her siblings and father during the course of our 12 year friendship and asked her if I was being totally unreasonable- she told me I was allowed to be angry, hurt and sad and it would fade. She also reminded me of all that I should be proud of and told me how important I am to her with or without a uterus. She made me smile and let me feel.

Let yourself mourn, cry, be angry, be happy then be at peace. You are who you are and I'm sure important to many, many people, keep your head up- we are never dealt more than we can cope with sometimes it's just a bit hard.

Hope you feel alot better soon- let us know how you are...

Lots of love and hugs
Jo xxx

Thank you nowok,
All the feelings you describe are exactly what I am feeling. The terrible sadness sores over me. But I am a strong women and will get past this. I have had an extraordinary 27yrs of life, that which many much older than me have not experience nor will and I am thankful for what I have received.

I send blessings to all who feel down.
we "sisters", take a moment, close our eyes, and hold each others hands and hug one another for comfort as we face this day,
and know we are stronger together as we pray.