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Seriously--is it really worth it?? Seriously--is it really worth it??

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  #1  
Unread 11-21-2007, 06:18 PM
Unhappy - Seriously--is it really worth it?? Seriously--is it really worth it??

Hi sisters!

I come to you with a very heavy heart and a need for a little venting! Since cancelling my TVH et. al. surgeries over the summer in order for me to explore other surgical options that will allow me to keep my cervix. I just found out today after meeting with the ONLY urogyn my insurance co employs that he doesn't do LSHs. Can this get any worse?? I cannot afford to pay out of pocket for this type of surgery through a dr outside of my insurance!

Urogyn even had the nerve to tell me that a uterus has no part in a woman's orgasm! Seriously! This man when to medical school and specializes in female anatomy!!!! I didn't even give him the option to weigh in about a cervix's role.

My problem is with the LSH out, that leave only 2 options; neither of them great. 1st...an abdominal hyster that leaves my cervix. I'm not a small woman; in fact I'm about 60 lbs overweight, with a lot of my weight in my stomach area. I worry about the invasiveness of this method and the fact that I'm overweight. 2nd...is going back to the TVH and losing the cervix.

<<TMI AHEAD>> About me...

I am a very very sexual woman. At this point, even with all of the issues I have down there, I have a very very fulfilling sexual relationship with my DH. I am very in tuned to my body and know that my uterus and cervix definately play a role in my orgasms.

My issues down there are simple. Uterine prolapse, rectocele and cystocele, all of which are annoying but not painful. My biggest complaint is that I can't sneeze or cough without wetting myself.

So, my sisters, it is really worth it? Are the potential risks/complications/results of either surgery worth altering my sex life forever? Does quality of life (wetting myself daily) have any influence? Will I look back 5 years from now and wish that I just said "NO!" to the surgeries or will I wish that I had done it?

I'm so very sorry for the horribly long post! I just can't find my footing anymore! I know most of you will come back with "it's my choice". But I'm looking for more!

Thank you!!
  #2  
Unread 11-21-2007, 10:43 PM
Seriously--is it really worth it??

Steffie--

I do not know your history, but did you know that prolapses can be fixed without removing the uterus? Even your uterus can be supported without being removed (uterine suspension). If it's not causing any other problems, it isn't necessary to remove it just because it is prolapsing. Certainly, rectoceles and cystoceles are fixed often enough without removal of the uterus at all.

Having said that, I do want you to know that I was worried about the intimacy issue myself before my TVH and cystocele repair of almost 2-1/2 years ago. I personally do NOT feel it has been a problem. If you want to read more about how many women feel and deal with this fear, you can do a search here on Hyster Sisters and see. (Search is on the purple bar at the top of this page.)

I do hope you find all the pros and cons you need to make a decision.

Sending +++ thoughts to you........
  #3  
Unread 11-21-2007, 11:22 PM
Seriously--is it really worth it??

Steffie,

Perhaps your prolapse is such that your cervix cannot be preserved with any type of hysterectomy. My bladder had prolapsed twice into my vagina, so I didn't have the option to keep it. My gyn performed an LAVH and "lifted" my bladder for the second time. I too am overweight, on my feet for nearly 40 hours a week on my job, and perform a lot of lifting. All of those can contribute to pelvic prolapse.

Stimulation of the clitoris, vagina and/or G-spot result in an orgasm. The uterus contacts during orgasms and that is what we feel. As far as I know, the cervix plays no part in orgasm. The vaginal walls produce the lubrication we need to facilitate intercourse.

I still have very strong and satisfying orgasms without my cervix. I don't miss it in the least. At my last gyno exam my bladder was still where it should be. Do I miss my cervix? Not in the least. As far as I was concerned, the cervix was just an organ that could become cancerous later in life, and I didn't want any more pelvic surgeries in my lifetime.

You might want to seek another opinion and re-think the vaginal hysterectomy.

Good luck to you!

Carol
  #4  
Unread 11-22-2007, 01:17 AM
Seriously--is it really worth it??

Maybe this is a decision you can postpone for a while, if your symptoms are not too problematic at the moment.

I think that you will come to a point though, when your prolapsed uterus, cystocele and rectocele will start to interfere seriously with your sex life. It is my experience after three repair operations that these things gradually get worse and start to interfere with BMs, personal cleanliness etc., even walking about. Also, and in your case perhaps the most important, all the bulges can affect you and your partner's enjoymentof sex and can sometimes make it impossible.
Just another point to ponder.... not an easy decision for you, but maybe you should wait until it bothers you so much that you have to go ahead.
Good luck.
  #5  
Unread 11-22-2007, 06:52 AM
Seriously--is it really worth it??

Maybe you can just get the TVT tape done to stop the leaking and wait on the rest until you can't stand it any longer. I personally had my ability to orgasm change tremendously after my TVH. It is hardly worth the effort now. Having said that, I was at a point where I couldn't have sex at all before surgery, my uterus wouldn't move out of the way, so what choice did I have. Everytime I did have an 'O', I peed myself - lol.
Everyone is different, you have to decide whether or not it is worth the risk. I did check into having my uterus put back where it belongs and from what I read, the surgery has a maybe 5 year success rate. Hugs and good luck to you.
  #6  
Unread 11-27-2007, 03:38 PM
Seriously--is it really worth it??

You sound similar to me. I am about 30 pounds overweight, have uterine prolapse, cystocele and rectocele, have a GREAT sex life with my husband and I KNOW the uterus/cervix plays a big role in my orgasms. My gyno too tried to tell me it doesn't and I cut him off mid-sentence and said, "I can FEEL it." He didn't continue his argument.

I too have no pain, but just some inconvenience with the prolapses. I might wet a bit when I sneeze or run but it is nothing earth-shattering. Sometimes I can feel a bulge but like many annoyances in life you get used to it. There is balm and stuff you can use to minimize discomfort. There's much worse things a person could have to deal with such as needing to self catheterize for the rest of your life if they screw up anterior repair.

So my conclusions are these:

* Sex - if it ain't broke don't fix it. I am loathe to let a doctor cut and paste me down there and risk the possibility sex will hurt or just not feel right or orgasms will no longer be mind-blowing. My husband and I are healthy and expect to live many more years and we both want the sex to stay just like it is. I just cannot believe major rearranging of all my stuff and removal of my "orgasmer" won't have some sort of negative impact on my sex life. I look at the minor inconvenience of leakage when I sneeze as a very low price to pay for a fantastic sex life which I expect to continue for the rest of my life.

* Why trade 100% certainty of minor inconvenience for a smaller, but real, risk of major horrible complications? If the risk were REALLY small, like one in 20 million I might consider it. But from what I read the risk of painful or very inconvenient complications or ultimately needing additional surgery seems to be anywhere between 5% and 50% or more. Any number in that ballpark is way too big for me. I'll take the minor inconvenience.

* The risk of the prolapse getting worse if untreated is real, but I can find no data indicating it is significantly large - certainly NOTHING to indicate the risk is higher than the risks associated with repair - and if it does worsen, I can find no data telling me the symptoms will become unbearable or unmanageable. On the contrary, there seem to be a lot of woman with prolapse much worse than mine who get along with it fine.

This is my current conclusion and decision, but it is always open to change. I was told a couple of years ago I need a hysterectomy and repairs and I registered on this site to learn more about it. I made the decision to put off the surgery for the reasons listed above, but I can always change my mind later if I want. As time goes by, they are bound to improve their technique and perhaps lower the rates of complications and come up with very different and better techniques to repair this problem. At that point I will re-evaluate my options. Or if the prolapses worsen so much they are no longer an "inconvenience" but become major quality of life issues, again, I might re-evaluate my options.
  #7  
Unread 11-27-2007, 09:13 PM
Seriously--is it really worth it??

These posts all tell me what informed women we are and how lucky we are to have a website such as this to discuss these issues frankly.

I think you need to go with your "gut" feeling after doing all your research and only then will you be comfortable with your decision.

My prolapses (uterus, bladder and rectum) were interfering with my sex life in that I found it hard to feel sexy with things bulging out of me. I too worried that I might have complications and that I might be messing with something that was just an inconvenience.

My reasons for opting for surgery was that I felt I was too young to have my sex life disrupted as it was, I was healthy and had a good chance of recovering well, and I trusted my doctor. I was also able to schedule the surgery so that I could be off work for 12 weeks, giving me ample time for recovery.

My sex life is great once again. I honestly can't tell my uterus or cervix is gone. I was lucky and have had no complications and I have no regrets.
I will continue to restrict my lifting/pushing in order to lessen any chance of recurrence, because although I'm glad I had it done, I don't ever want to have to do it again.

Good post!
  #8  
Unread 11-28-2007, 06:40 PM
Seriously--is it really worth it??

I had a TVT done in May of 2008. I was just too tired of the constant peeing myself when I laughed, coughed, sneezed, giggled, dance, lifted etc. I had received a flyer in the mail about a minimally invasive TVT and that a local doctor was holding a seminar. I was a little nervous to go but there were over 100 local women there with the same problem. I am so glad that I had the TVT done. I have my first cold since the operation and let me tell you it is wonderful to cough and not pee myself!!! My doctor does them on an outpatient basis. The surgery takes less than 30 minutes, you can opt to stay awake so no recovery from antheisa. He does them on Wednesday morning and your back to work by Monday! I would look into having just the TVT done in my opinion.
  #9  
Unread 11-28-2007, 08:16 PM
Seriously--is it really worth it??

I had TAH a little more than a year and a half ago for fibroids and heavy bleeding. I have better "O"s than I did pre-TAH. I don't think my uterus or cervix being gone is an issue for me. In fact, I don't think I'd be here today if I had not had the surgery. When they opened me up, they found scar tissue wrapped around my bowels and one of my ovaries and adhesions in several places even though I had never had surgery before - I've heard that this is rare, but correct me if I'm wrong. I don't think they could have seen the scar tissue if they had done it laparoscopically or vaginally and believe they had to open me up to see and remove the scar tissue and "undo" the adhesions, but I could be wrong. Also, I was severely and chronically anemic and was not getting better even with iron supplementation because I was bleeding so heavily. I now walk at least 3 miles a day Monday through Friday. Having the surgery was a risk, but I believe that in my case, the good has outweighed anything that could be considered negative.

I hope you make a decision you don't regret whether you have surgery or not.

Take care.
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