My Boss Said What????

I have a good one for all you lovely ladies!!!! So my surgery is 1 week away. I am getting freaked out, i have been for a while now. I usually keep my lips slamed shut because I am afraid what I will say to people won't be very nice, i can't believethat i didn't say anything after this one.
It's 7:15 am , I just got to work, and my boss followed me up the office area and was just pokeing around trying to get me to talk. So i tryed to explain to him that I am starting to get forgetful and I am sorry for that, and I am sorry that I am not myself these days, I am just starting to get a bit stressed. He looked at me and said (he asid this once before, I had NO comment then) "You are ONLY having a partial right, so that shouldn't be that bad" i tryed to get away form him at this point and he just followed me, and said... (I hope you all are sitting down for this one ladies) "Well I understand that you are nervous but you have had this surgery before haven't you???".... I just looked at him and said "well no i haven't had a hysteroctomy before.... I really only have ONE uterus.." I think I am going to stich my lips closed for the next 3 days I have to work. I was very happy I only had a 1/2 day today!!!! He is going to be following me around for the next 3 days i just know it!!!
I thought you all would like to have a peek in the life of Carla!! I am working for a BIG FAT MAN DORK!!!!!!

Oh Carla -- I can SO identify with you!!

My boss is a real piece of work also. Last spring, around this time, when we were putting together our development plans for '07, he told me that I'm too passionate about my job and need to work on my composure. (Keep in mind that one of our company tenets is "Passion for Results.")

Whatever, I think the guy is an idiot, so I didn't think much of it. I went about building my development plan the way *I* wanted it.

Well, in June, I told him I was having a hysterectomy and would be out six weeks. Later that day he called me back into his office. NO joke, this is what he said:

"Remember when we talked about your development plan awhile back? I had mentioned that you needed to work on composure. Well, now that you're having this surgery, I can see that maybe all of that is *biological* so if you want to take it out of your plan, you can."

My jaw dropped open. I came *this* close to going to HR. I can't stand the guy to begin with and I work for a very large corporation where this comment would be VERY much frowned upon by the HR folks.

To this day, I still can't believe that an AVP said that. Idiot.

LOL.
Dear Carla,
I think I work for your boss's twin brother!!!!! When I informed my boss that I needed to have a hysterectomy he asked if they were taking "everything" (guess he couldn't bear to say the word "ovaries"!!) I responded that yes, they were taking everything and I guess I will have to go on hormone replacement therapy. He nodded wisely and said " oh yeah, I had an aunt who had to have that done and she took hormones and died of breast cancer". Can you believe that???? The man is a moron, plain and simple. Of course, 5 seconds after he made that stupid comment he added quickly "not that it will happen to you". I wanted to say you'd better hope it doesn't buddy because you don't know your *** from a hole in the ground and if something happens to me you'll be dead meat. However, I kept my mouth shut. ROTFLMAO.
At any rate, you'll be happy to know that he REALLY missed me while I was out because he had to do some work for a change and it must've gotten bad because he sent me a big box of chocolate covered fruit!!!! I went back to work today and he tiptoed around me all day....I think he's afraid I might blow because my hormones are unbalanced!!! I'm going to play that as long as I possibly can!!!
Good luck with your surgery and try to overlook the stupid things people will say to you both before and after the procedure. Take as long as you need to recover because you only have one chance to do it right.
Best wishes and tell my big fat dork boss's twin I said hello!!!!

	Quote:
Originally Posted by AprilT243 LOL. Dear Carla, I think I work for your boss's twin brother!!!!! When I informed my boss that I needed to have a hysterectomy he asked if they were taking "everything" (guess he couldn't bear to say the word "ovaries"!!) I responded that yes, they were taking everything and I guess I will have to go on hormone replacement therapy. He nodded wisely and said " oh yeah, I had an aunt who had to have that done and she took hormones and died of breast cancer". Can you believe that???? The man is a moron, plain and simple. Of course, 5 seconds after he made that stupid comment he added quickly "not that it will happen to you". I wanted to say you'd better hope it doesn't buddy because you don't know your *** from a hole in the ground and if something happens to me you'll be dead meat. However, I kept my mouth shut. ROTFLMAO. At any rate, you'll be happy to know that he REALLY missed me while I was out because he had to do some work for a change and it must've gotten bad because he sent me a big box of chocolate covered fruit!!!! I went back to work today and he tiptoed around me all day....I think he's afraid I might blow because my hormones are unbalanced!!! I'm going to play that as long as I possibly can!!! Good luck with your surgery and try to overlook the stupid things people will say to you both before and after the procedure. Take as long as you need to recover because you only have one chance to do it right. Best wishes and tell my big fat dork boss's twin I said hello!!!!

All I can say is WOW....

I'm sorry you're having such a frustrating time.

I think most people just don't really know what to say. They want to comfort us, and they want to make it seem like it's going to be "OK". Think about what you see on this very website -- the all come back over here to the pre-op side and say things like, "I don't know what I was so worried about -- waiting was the hardest part" or "I hardly even needed my pain meds" or whatever. So even your own (((sisters))) might post on this thread telling you that the anxiety you're feeling now is far worse than the actual recovery from the surgery.

I'm not trying to downplay the situation -- please don't misunderstand me. I completely understand your feelings, and I'd be more worried about you if you *weren't* feeling anxiety surrounding your upcoming operation. On the other hand, however, I don't think what your boss said was all that different than what others have heard -- so you're in good company with the rest of the (((sisters))). The important thing is that you remember that he's not the one having the surgery -- you are. Your experience is yours alone, and no matter what anyone else has had -- this is *your* time to have surgery and recover.

I think it's also especially difficult for the employee/employer relationship when the surgery is so personal in nature and the two parties involved are of different genders. It's much more likely that he won't really be able to understand how the surgery may impact your life, so although it may be difficult to do this, you may want to consider cutting him some slack and just trying to let it go for now. He may be awfully embarrassed just trying to get some of these words out! I know that's not an excuse, but some people are just "better" at the tough talks than other people.

You're very stressed out right now (which is understandable since you're about to have surgery) so make sure you're especially gentle with yourself right now. Take some time out and do something just for you, OK?

Hope this helps.

Hello sisters..... (children mentioned) I am having my TAH on April 17th... I do home daycare and have a DS who is 12, and a DH who is a complete IDIOT!! (I love em' anyway!!) I do homedaycare, I look after 3 2 year olds. 1 of the childrens parents, who I am close with, actually had the NERVE to ask me " well do you think it would be ok to bring my daughter here, and since your DH is on afternoons, he can watch her during the day till he goes to work then you will only be with her for 1.5 houes till your son gets home?? You should be ok with her for only 1.5 hours right???" ARE YOU KIDDING ME?????????? And asked if i got out of the hospital on the Monday, can she bring her on the Wednesday, although she really doesnt want to have to take 2 days off work.. I ALMOST L O S T IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the little girl weighs 28lbs, and is very "upity" all the time, and is a handful. Not that I would conider it anyway, but I just cant believe the nerve of some people.... I am flattered that they only really trust there child with me and are happy with the quality of care I provide, but COME ON!!!! She has had 2 c-sections, and her gall bladder out, she kinda knows what this is all about right...... I just couldnt believe it... I am still an awww..

Your sister
trufrend