Returned to work ~ crying, depressed

Well I'm almost at the 2 month mark. Physically I feel great...incisions are healing well and I'm getting my energy back. I'm going to try to do some light exercise at the gym today.
I started back to work last week. I work in a busy Emergency Room Department (44 beds which are usually filled with many more waiting in the waiting room). We work with 2-4 providers so we are running, running, running. I only sit to sew lacerations and to type discharge notes. I cried on the way to work the first day- I dreaded going back. My DH had a beautiful plant arrangement waiting there for me. I was greeted by my coworkers who said they all missed me...lots of hugs and smiles.
The night was rough though. My back was killing me by about the 10th hour and I was completely exhausted by the 12th. The next 4 days were better- more strength, less pain.
Today, I'm a psychological mess- crying, depressed. I wish I could climb out of this hole. I kept an ovary so I'm not on HRT. I am on anti-depressant- have been for 18 years.
Anyone else feel this way? I should be happy to be getting back to the real world- and the endo pain is gone.

midnight I wouldn't be able to handle your routine at the best of times.

Midnight, we have the same surgery date, and I was able to keep both ovaries.

I have found that the last couple of weeks, my hormones have been all over the place!! I have been on anti-depressants for a couple of years now, and my doctor and I had thought to try to wean me off, until we found out about my surgery. We are now going to wait for a couple more months, to help my hormones get back to some semblance of normal before weaning me off. However, even with my meds, I find I have been far more weepy lately than I was before surgery. I was thinking part of it was due to my frustration with trying to get back to "normal". I have been feeling "lighter", and I am trying to make my house reflect that. I have been editing so many rooms. (You wouldn't believe the tampons and pads I have found hidden away!!) However, things are not going as quickly as I would like. I am having a hard time finding the energy to keep going. I am just in awe of all of you ladies who have gone back to work, and still find the time and energy to do what needs to be done at home. I wish I had your stamina!!

Midnight, I worked as an RN in a rehab unit (physical rehab--strokes, hip/knee replacement, arthritis therapy, that sort of thing) for several years. I was always in awe of the girls in Emerg, as they were always run off their feet, and yet, they were still able to sympathize and empathize with their patients, which made all the difference in the world for them. Don't ever underestimate the power of your smile, or the influence of a kind word. That will stay with your patients forever. A true angel of mercy!!

Hi laterbloomer!
I just finished another 13 hour day and what a day it was! The emergency department is getting crazy nowadays with 5-6 hour wait times. I cried driving to work last week thinking about it but thanks to all the support I received on this web site, I did ok. I hurt so bad weeks 1-2 and was so weak and exhausted weeks3-4 that I thought I'd never be well again.
I feel great physically...so hang in there ladies!
And thank you to everyone who put their two cents in to reply to my comments. I consider you my friends!

Craftingaddict,
I just read your reply. I too worked in a rehab center like yours- 3 years as supervisor on the night shift. It became boring for an adrenalin addict like me so I went back to school to become a nurse practitioner.
You and I are a lot alike in our recovery although I had a lap procedure- 2 tiny punctures on my belly. I can't imagine how painful a vertical incision would be. Most of my stitches were inside at the rectocele repair.
Hang in there with your emotions. I'm on a roller coaster too- my doctor says the ovaries can go into overdrive or can shut down due to the changes made.
I've found a lot of comfort in this web site thanks to people like you. Thanks for your support!