scared it could be cancer.

Just before bed on September 18th I went to the bathroom before climbing into bed. To my horror I had urinated a lot of brown blood. I couldn't tell my husband that this had just happened because he would have made me go to the hospital right then. And while I should have probably gone I knew that the following day was the surprise 40th birthday party for my husband that I had been planning since July. I had a ton of his high school and college friends coming in from out of town and couldn't cancel the party at that point. I knew that my phone was going to ring at 6 am when a friend was going to call me to tell me that she needed to take her youngest to the hospital right then and needed me to come watch her other kids. I knew if I told my husband what had just happened that he would tell me to stay in bed and that he would go watch the kids for my friend. This would have been great if my friend really was going to take her youngest the the ER, but since it was really just my excuse to get out of the house so I could get the party set up I couldn't risk his response. I told a couple friends later the next day that I had urinated a lot of blood and they all urged me to go to urgent care right after the party. I told my husband during the party that when it was over I needed to go to Urgent Care and why. He was concerned. My oldest son (14) overheard what I was saying to my husband and the first words out of his mouth were "you have cancer". I told him not to worry that I was sure it was just a bladder infection. I had my doubts only because I had a bladder infection EVERY month I was pregnant so I am very aware of what they feel like and I had no symptoms other than the blood, urgency, and a pressure in my pelvic area that feels like I was 9 months pregnant. I got to urgent care and they did a urinalysis. The doctor assumed that I did have a bladder infection that just didn't have the burning associated with it. He prescribed Cipro for 3 days. I took all my Cipro and figured all was good... the blood had gone away. A week later I wasn't feeling right again. No blood in the urine this time but just not feeling right. Again I went back to Urgent Care (with my busy schedule who has time for making an appointment with my primary care doctor). Anyway they did another urinalysis. The doctor tells me that they don't think that what I have is a bladder infection and they don't think that what I had on the 19th was one either. They had gotten the culture back from the 19th and it didn't show any abnormal bacteria, but since I only had one dose of antibiotics left by the time the culture came back they just let it go and figured I would be back if I was still having issues. He said my current dip test didn't show an infection but that he would send it for a microscopic test and another culture. He gave me a medication to numb my bladder and said he would call if I needed an antibiotic. Later that night I got a phone call from the doctor letting me know the microscopic test showed some bacteria so he was going to prescribe Cipro for again for 5 days this time. After two days he called me back and said that the culture showed no abnormal bacteria so he wanted me to stop the antibiotic and he wanted me to make an appointment with my primary for the next couple days and if I couldn't get in with her he wanted me back in Urgent Care so he could start some other test. I called my primary the next day and got an appointment for a couple days out. When I went in to see my primary she said because of the pelvic pressure she needed to do a pelvic exam. After doing the pelvic exam she said that she wanted me to go in the next day for a pelvic and transvaginal ultrasound. So Oct 7th I went in for the ultrasounds. My heart sank when the ultrasound tech reached up and turned the monitor so I couldn't see. The first thought that went into my mind was that she found something. I mean they have the monitors tipped regularly when they do pregnancy ultrasounds so why did she need to turn it so I couldn't see? She left the room and came back to finish. While she was out I tried to look at the screen but she had locked it back to the screen saver She wasn't talking to me at all, no small talk, nothing. I kept telling myself that maybe this was just her personality and I was being too paranoid. I was already nervous going in because a friend had told me that it is possible to have blood in your urine if you have ovarian cancer. I know that I have polycystic ovaries and so I asked the tech if she could see the cyst. I know she isn't allowed to diagnosis or tell me about abnormalities since she isn't a doctor, but I thought if I mentioned that they were there and that I was aware of them maybe she would say something. Maybe she was even hiding that because she wasn't sure if I knew about them or not. Her answer to me was "I see an ovary." Great that doesn't help me at all. I left bawling. My ultrasound appointment was for 3 p.m. and took until about 3:20 to complete. When I got home at 4 my primary had called and asked me to call her back. For a doctor personally and so quick after an ultrasound that already had me freaked out I was really scared. I called her back and she said she was calling me to tell me that there was a lot of blood in my urine again and that she had already received my ultrasound report back. She said the ultrasound looked good and she released my results for me to see online through the clinics online medical records program. I opened them and read them and saw that it said "No masses noted". Yay!!! No masses my fear of ovarian cancer can go away now and I can just focus on going to the urologist to figure out where the blood is coming from. On October 19th I got the statement from my insurance company. I NEVER open them because I figure I am going to get the bill from the doctor anyway. But since I had been to the doctor so much in the past month I decided to open it. It showed the two ultrasounds but then it also showed that they did a vascular study. I didn't know about that and it is a $950 test by itself so I called the doctor and her assistant said that the doctor had not ordered a vascular study so they would see about getting it taken off the bill. On the 21st at 10:45 am my primary doctor, not her assistant, called me again. She said she had figured out what the vascular study was. The radiology tech had seen a mass on my left ovary and when she left the room she had gone to talk to the radiologist to have him order the vascular study. She said there was a 4.8 cm mass on my left ovary and that I needed to get into see the GYN. I said I had a yearly appointment set up for Dec 3rd and she said no I needed to go now and she would call and get me in sooner. My primary sent my results and records over to the GYN. I got a call on Monday morning from the GYN at 10:15 asking if I could be there at 11. Crap. They are calling me and want me in NOW. I was figuring they would call and say can you come in later in the week or next week, but only giving me 45 min notice!!! I went in and she said that she isn't 100% sure from the ultrasound what the mass is. She knows it is solid and has blood going to it. She asked if I was 100% sure I was done having kids. And while I know my husband and I are done having kids at 33 I am NOT ready to let them take my ovaries and send me into menopause. Since I couldn't give her that answer she said we could give it a couple weeks and have another ultrasound done to see if it had grown any and then decide what to do. My urologist is ordering a CT scan to look at my kidneys to see if we can find out where the blood is coming from, so we are just going to add on looking at the mass at the same time. I don't know if the CT scan can tell them more than the ultrasound and if the CT scan can give the measurements of the mass. I am afraid it is getting bigger fast. I noticed this morning that my jeans are a snugger in the pelvic area and that I now have a bump on the left side of my pelvic area. It looks like when you are pregnant and you have the head or bottom sticking out causing there to be a bump in that area. Does that make sense? I don't know if I am just imagining it. My best friend could totally see what I was talking about. I am trying to calm myself by telling myself that my left side has alway been shaped differently than my right. I don't know if that is true... but I can hope right?? I am going to talk to my GYN again tomorrow, and I will have the CT scan done in the afternoon. But my anxiety is getting pretty high again. I don't know why it took from Oct 7th to Oct 21st for the radiologist to inform us about the mass and why the initial report came back as "no masses noted". At first I was hoping maybe they got the wrong patients records, but unfortunately that isn't so.

Sorry that this post is so long.

Stephanie

Stephanie:
I am sorry that you have this stressing you out. We have a saying here about not wasting a good panic. Unfortunately, that is easier said than done. Sometimes our fears are worse than the actual reality.
It is good that they are on top of things and getting the scans done.
The waiting is absolutely the worst part of all of this.
Let us know what is happening. Wishing you only the best.

I know when dealing with the tests it seems like they should have the answers right then. Unfortunately the techs the do the tests aren't the ones that give the final results. And those results can take a few days to a couple weeks to return to the doctor. The doctor really should not have said anything until s/he received the FINAL report.

As for the turning of the screen, I believe they do that so the patient doesn't freak out. When you go for an ultrasound while pregnant you are looking for a baby. Other than that its just blobs of black, white, and gray. Someone without a medical back round could very easily mistake a "blob" for something more serious.

I understand that you are not looking forward to menopause...but in reality, which would be worse? Early menopause or cancer?

(((Stephanie))) I am very sorry you are going through all of this and the waiting for test results can be the absolutely hardest. As someone already said while difficult pls try not to waste a good panic. If your doctor indicates concern re a possible gyn cancer, pls consider getting the opinion of a gyn/onc who are the cancer experts. Pls keep us posted.

Hi Stephanie

I have ovarian cancer, and never ever have I urinated blood.

What may happen with your scan, is they will either decide to "wait and watch" to see what happens with the ovary, or they will want to do surgery. If you have surgery, I strongly agree with Peggiesue that you should have a gynecologic oncologist perform it. They are the experts, and give you the best chance of full cancer removal (if it even is cancer). They won't be able to definitively tell you if it is cancer until surgery where they can send tissue for pathology.

The hardest part is waiting. I know what the mind can do - and the stress you are under. Take a deep breath. Take several! No matter what this is - your life is NOT over!! If (heaven forbid) it is cancer, there are options and treatments available.

Hang in there!

Hope it will help you to know that my sister (7 years well after breast cancer) recently urinated blood due to a kidney stone. And, my mother had an ovarian cyst the size of a grapefruit that was benign. She looked pregnant by the time her cyst was removed. I had an ovarian cyst removed during my hysterectomy last year and at my age (57) there is a good likelihood that it would have been cancerous, but it was benign, too.

As other hystersisters have said, the waiting is the worst. But, "it ain't over 'til it's over," so please try to do things you enjoy to relax and distract you while you wait.

Thank you all so much for the words of encouragement. I had the CT scan done today and now I just have to wait. The did do the contrast so they could see the renal system to see if there is a stone that is causing the blood.

I am just feeling very frustrated and defeated at the moment. I am holding on the fact that it will be a benign tumor that is on the ovary, but get more and more worried as I can see the left side of my pelvic area grow. It is reassuring to know that your (Gerry) mom looked pregnant by the time she had her cyst was removed. I have been trying to make my GYN go faster through this whole process because I just found out that we are losing our insurance at the end of the month because my husband has been laid off. We will try to do the cobra but that will be around $1000 a month I am assuming and while without work I don't know how we will afford that I know it will be cheaper than any surgery I could possibly need to have.