I just feel lost...............

Hi everyone. I haven' posted on here for some time. I am coming up on my 1 year anniversary of my total LAVH. I was cruising along doing wonderful and in the last month or so I don't know what has happened. I don't know if it's the holidays or what. I am just not myself. I am taking 10mg of Lexapro and that had seemed to be working for me as far as the mood swings and such. I just want to crawl under a rock most days. I don't want to get out of bed, I feel like crying 90% of the time, my memory is shot and I can't seem to focus on anything for very long. I went for my "annual" visit in October and all was well. My hubby and I have had some intercourse issues and she told me she could put me on testosterone but I just wasn't ready to go there yet. I've been without any HRT at all since the surgery and really don't want to start now. Something has to give though. I've been grieving that I have never been able to get pregnant and it's eating at me something aweful. We adopted our son in 2004 and he is the light of our life but my job with family services puts me in contact with infants and pregnant teens all the time and all of those old feelings are coming back again. The 6 years that we spent trying to have a baby and all of the anger and depression are creeping back in on me and I don't know how to deal with it now. I don't want to feel this way. Sorry that this is all over the place but that is where my head is right now. I have an appt with my GP tomorrow and am going to talk to her about the issues and feelings that I am having and see what she has to say.

Im sorry you are feeling so down. I hope your Dr was able to help you with some of the issue. I sure they could up your lexapro a lil too. that might help with some of the depression issues.

Oh (((sister))) I'm so sorry you're dealing with all of this right now.

It's hard enough to deal with emotional issues, but then add to that the trauma of major surgery, and it can just seem like way too much to bear. I'm glad you're talking with your about all of this.

Please let us know how things go, OK? We are here for you and we care.

Thanks guys. I had forgotten about this site and knew that I would find support here. I did go to my GP yesterday and they are changing me from Lexapro to Zoloft to see if that will help with my depression. I feel better having talked to him yesterday and will start my new meds on Friday morning. They want me off of the Lexapro for a couple days to get it out of my system before starting the new one. He did also say he could recommend a therapist if I thought that may help. I don't know that I am ready to take that leap yet or not. I know it would probably help and I may decide to do it. Any of you guys talk to a therapist? I never have but my husband just doesn't know how to "help".

Kimmie -

I have had low-grade anxiety and depression for years. Thankfully I had a therapist I really, really trust before my cancer dx. He was and has been a gift through this whole process. The key is to interview several Drs. and find the one that is a right fit, I went through 3 before I found my guy. I had never been on anti-d's and if I hadn't been going to my guy for so long when this all triggered clinical depression if I didn't trust him so much I would have never gone there and gotten the help I needed.

Anti-d's can sometimes need to be switched up at times, remember that if it doesn't seem to be working or if you have some side effects to let the Dr. know there are lots of different kinds and you may have to try several. I tried 3 before I found one that "agreed" with me.

You do realize that coming up on your 1 year anniversary can trigger bunches of emotions, especially since it was so emotional the first time and such a major surgery.

Hang in there, keep seeking the help you need.

Sending

G

I think that coming up on the 1 year anniversary has a lot to do with it. I am anxious to try the zoloft starting tomorrow and hope that it helps with the depression symptoms. I spoke with a friend of mine the other night who had a complete hysterectomy 2 years ago and it really helped talking to her. She understood what I was talking about and that made the biggest difference. I thank you guys again so much for all your support and advice.