Dear Jim,

I know what a difficult time this is for us. As if we didn't already have enough on our plate with a short-notice overseas move, but to get the news on our 3rd wedding anniversary that I needed a hysterectomy...I know that was extremely hard on you. I may not have cried, or even seemed affected, but I am. My head is spinning, and I just want time to stop in this moment: a moment where we are living in our first home together, raising a beautiful little girl, living the American Dream, with big hopes for the future.

We've been blessed to have one beautiful child. I know you are disappointed that we won't have any more children, but I can promise you I will give everything I have in raising our daughter to be an amazing person. Know that for all my faults, I love her more than you can possibly imagine one person could love another, and I will be the best mommy she could ever know.

There are times you will need to be away from us. I won't lie: these times will be difficult, but that little girl gives me reserves of strength I didn't know I had, and I WILL pull through as a survivor, and we will be a better family for all of our hard work and sacrifice. I know you worry that our bonds will suffer with the distance, but I believe we will grow closer and tighter together through it all.

I have been so blessed to have you as a husband, but your work isn't done yet. I am bound to test your will and strength in the weeks to come. Please remember that I will lean on you (literally and figuratively) when I don't have the energy or desire to pick myself up and keep going. I will have physical demands and challenges to face. And remember, this is going to be a very trying time for me emotionally. When it seems I don't care about the other issues we are facing, please don't be angry or disappointed in me. Know that I am focused on my health and recovery, so that I can be the wife and mother you both love and rely on. I am so overwhelmed at this time, and I really don't know what to expect. Please don't mistake confusion for indifference. When I say something that you think is decidedly selfish, please remember that only ONE issue is on my mind right now: surviving and recovery.

You know I hate to ask for help, but make me do it. If you have concerns regarding the surgery, the recovery, future treatments: ask ME, and we will do the research together. We will talk to my doctor together. My experience will be unique, just as every other woman facing a hysterectomy will have her own story.

All I know for certain at this time is that I need you, and I love you and our daughter more than imaginable. For every minute of support you give me, I will return five.

Love you now and always,
Ang