Home Alone Tale

I've been home for a week and today was the first time I've actually been left alone. DH and my girls are building a barn (!) and needed lumber. Ah, finally! Some unsupervised *ME* time. I figured they'd be gone at least an hour and a half.

For a week now I've been watching from a window - the chickens in the yard, my duck splashing in a pool outside my bedroom window, a barn being built before my eyes.... Before my surgery I had a little bitty serama hen start sitting on eggs in a mixing bowl in the garage. I was curious.

I yanked off my night gown and pulled on a pair of loose shorts, a tee shirt, and my rubber boots (why bother with bending to tie shoes, right??). Out the door, across the driveway, into the sweltering garage, and over the lawn mower to the farthest, darkest corner. My old crock mixing bowl was sitting on a shelf with a little black hen nearly filling the whole space. I could hear the peeping of her chicks! They were trapped in the bowl, under a fully feathered momma, in a garage sure to get 120 degrees by this afternoon.

In a heartbeat I snatched up the bowl, hen and all, and bent my body over it so she wouldn't take off. I climbed back over the assembled obstacle course and slowly walked to the chicken house. Before the surgery I'd set up a cage for this very purpose and it was waiting for me if I could just get there.

The other chickens, ducks, and guineas followed me into the coop where I deposited the little hen and her 5 (FIVE!) chicks. I got them some water and a bit of food, and stepped back to survey my work. Such cutie bugs!

The phone rang. It was my husband. I'm standing in a chicken coop surrounded by 10 hens and 3 crowing roosters - soooo busted!

"Hi! GuesswhatI'msittingontheporchwatchingthebirds!" (If I talk fast enough maybe he won't hear the roosters.)

"Uh. Ok. So, well....um...(he paused)....so, how many 6 foot boards do we already have?"

"Oh, I think 30."

"Great. Uh, we'll be home soon."

"Great! SeeyousoonLoveYou!!!"

I looked down. I had chicken dirt on my knees and probably in my hair. My shirt was soaked with sweat and the dog was looking at me like I was crazy. My stitches were hurting.

I needed water & a shower.

Haha,thanks for the giggle.I could actually picture the little babies,bet theyre cute.Glad you are feeling well enough to get out and check out our animals.Take it easy,Noelle

Awwww how lovely...baby chicks. Great great story.....definately made my day. I could actually picture you with your hubby on the phone. Haha!

Funny, funny, funny! Love baby chicks. Hope you have recovered from your adventure!

That's funny and something I would so do. Have you gotten up the nerve to tell your hubby you did it?

I am actually wondering if your hubby found out as well!!! That was a very cute story and something I would have done.

I had chicken dirt on my knees and probably in my hair. My shirt was soaked with sweat and the dog was looking at me like I was crazy. My stitches were hurting.

I needed water & a shower.

I figured I had about 45 minutes before they'd be back.

I worked my way slowly back to the house noting that my younger daughter (who likes to pretend to be a galloping horse jumping obstacles) had pulled random stuff out of the garage and erected hurdles all over the yard. Before the surgery I expressly asked her NOT to do that since it discourages my DH from mowing the lawn.

Annoyed, I made it to the kitchen and into the refrigerator where I've stashed a drinking glass - every other dish in the house is dirty, covering every square inch of the counter top. I got my drink and hid my glass again.

Then I made my way through the hall and around the growing mountain of laundry. It was all a blur. I was running out of time and my insides were really starting to protest.

In the bathroom I turned on the water, stripped down, and
stepped into the increasingly grimy shower. With locker room haste I washed my hair, soaped down my body, paused to check my steri strips and bruises, and then went to wash my face.

No wash cloth.

Urg!

Why were there no wash cloths! Where were they! I rinsed my face as best I could while muttering about imagined projects my girls could have dreamt up involving ALL the wash cloths.

A quick check of my knee caps verified that the barnyard evidence was washed away and then I turned off the water and stepped out of the shower, reaching for my towel.

No towel.

Cursing, I splashed across the room to the towel cabinet
which was EMPTY!

I headed for the archival pile of unfolded but allegedly
clean laundry in my bedroom. No towels.

Out of the corner of my eye I saw them pull into the driveway!

With great haste I grabbed a table cloth, dried my hair, and quickly wrapped it around my body like a towel.

Slow down, slow down. Act like nothing weird is going on.

I could hear them coming in the door. Then, my older daughter caught sight of me.

"What are you doing?" (hear the teenage sneer)

"Just drying off." (act casual) "There weren't any towels."

"But that's a table cloth!"

"Yeah, I know...."

Seeing my husband coming down the hall I raised my voice a bit and let my annoyed-because-you-people-are-totally letting-the-house-fall-apart-while-I'm-in-such-dire-pain attitude seep through....

"....I COULDN'T FIND ANY TOWELS!"

Quietly my husband said with eye brows raised, "Did you look in the dryer?"

"No," I mumbled and wandered back to the bathroom.

My younger daughter followed me into the bathroom. "Mom! That's a table cloth, not a towel. We use that to eat."

From the kitchen my older daughter called from the kitchen, "Why is this empty glass in the refrigerator?"
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More of yesterday and some of today.....minus my BFF coming out to see the barn building and my newly established grape vines. I escorted her around the "farm" in my nightgown tied in a knot and my rubber boots. Everyone should have a pair.
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Oh my gosh......this is great. Why does your house look like my house? We must have the same maids. Lol. Gosh wouldnt that be nice ....having a maid. Can't wait to hear more tomorrow!!!!

So loving this!!!! I guess all of our houses look the same!!!!

Can't wait to hear Part 3!!! Thanks bunches for the laughs!