Sex is still so painful 8-months post-op (kind of long)

Hello All,

First let me say how grateful I am for this site. It is a wonderful resource and I felt very well prepared for my hysterectomy...and then it happened.

I know my body very well, and a large part of my sexual response was from the "bump" against my cervix. So, I was adament in keeping it. I stressed it at every appointment. So much so that my doctor would go "I know, I know." Well, she decided to do be a "favor" while she is in there and tried to leave the cervix kind of thin. Unfortunately, this damaged my cervix and it had to be removed. I was dumfounded when I woke up and DH told me what had happened. When I asked about sex, she said "I doubt either of you will even notice."

Two weeks later I was in ER from passing egg-size blood clots. Apparently a large blood clot in my abdomen had pushed through my incisions where my cervix was removed and I had to have another surgery to repair that. My vagina felt like it had been scraped with jagged glass.

Now 8 months later, sex it still a problem. I have desire, which I am grateful for. External stimulation works, but takes a lonnnnnnnnnng time. Inside, hurts so bad. Early penetration ok, but up inside hurts. If hubby "bumps" where my cervix was, it is very painful. When I asked him what he feels up there, he said it feels "kind of hard." Both of us feel the difference very much.

I have tried Vagifem, but that didn't really seem to help. She examined me Friday, and I nearly came off of the table. She says that I look visually fine, so now she is at a loss. She said that she is open to "alternative" ideas if they are not harmful. So, basically I am on my own, and frankly I don't know where to turn.

I am crying as I write this because I feel so alone. I don't even know where to start researching and I am so discouraged. If I knew that all of this would happen, I would have dealt with my pain. Our sex life was somewhat limited from it, but at least it was enjoyable when we could have it. Is it even possible to get it back?

Princess Kim -

My personal recommendation would be to see a pelvic floor physical therapist. It may be that they can break up the scar tissue so that it is less hard.

I had some spots on my cuff that were like that. Have you talked to your Dr about this and do they have recommendations.

Thank you for taking the time to respond to this tauruslady. It is much appreciated!

When I saw my doctor on Friday, I told her everything that was going on. She didn't even mention the possibility of scar tissue. She just said that visually everything looked fine.

She did send me home with a very brief brochure about a pelvic and obstretrics program. She basically said it was a kind of physical therapy and said, "here research this." I asked what they do and she said, "I don't know, but they have someone that specializes in womens issues."

I have found her to be completely unhelpful. Plus, I have to say that I am so angry with her everytime we have sex since it ends in disaster because I feel like much of it is so unnecessary, she just screwed up.

I will look more at what she gave me but it is very brief. I didn't even know there was a name for this until I looked here.

Thanks again for helping me.