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husband can't take me to the hospital husband can't take me to the hospital

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  #11  
Unread 03-17-2002, 06:10 PM
husband can't take me to the hospital

I am so sorry to hear that you have to drive yourself to the hospital. I do agree with the others though, you need someone.
My surgery is scheduled Thursday the 21st. We have 3 children, our oldest is 15 and our youngest is 9. My husband is in the Navy, so he will be off Thursday with me and Friday he will work, then he goes on leave for 2 weeks. We live on base and thank goodness the two youngest ones go to school on the base and our son rides a navy bus into town to high school. Where we live you can actually see the hospital across the field. I told the kids if my room was on the side you can see our house and if I'm able, I will look out my window at the time they go to bed and they can look out their's at the same time, and we can wave at one another.
For the person who made the comment about the women who don't get paid for the time we have to take off work. I have a comment about that. Before I met the man I am married to today, I was that single mom you were talking about. I was single with my three kids for 6 years or longer. I know about having to take off work for one thing or another and not being paid for it. Back then, the company that I worked for didn't offer sick pay when you called in sick. All you got was I hope you get to feeling better or the kids get to feeling better. In fact, I work now and it takes both our income to run our household. But thank God, the company I work for has the benefits that I need so I will be getting paid almost my entire monthly pay while I'm off work. But I will still be worried about the bills and stuff, because I have never forgotten about the time when I was single and raising three kids on my own. My mother raised me to be a strong independant person. Even now after being married for almost 6 years, it's hard for me to be dependant on anyone. My husband loves me dearly and I still thank God for bringing us together. He knows I am going to hate staying in bed and letting him run the household and taking care of the kids. Which I know he's quite capable of doing. I just don't like the idea of being dependant on him and the kids. He's in the navy and is gone alot of times more than he's at home. But I have to once again think of myself and get the recovery that I need, so I can go back to work and be the independant person my mother raised me. But I still remember and will never forget the time I was that single mom who didn't get paid for the times I was off work.
Take care everyone...... I know a lot of us LIW have surgeries this week. I am one of those. I will keep everyone in my thoughts and prayers.

TGalvin
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  #12  
Unread 03-17-2002, 06:27 PM
husband can't take me to the hospital

Number13th Baby, can you slpit your 55 hours up so you can maybe start back to work early but at an hour or 2 a day?
Just a thought, it might be better than taking 55 hours off then trying to jump in full time. Sisters with 8 weeks leave, count
your blessings, I'm very happy for you!
  #13  
Unread 03-17-2002, 07:16 PM
husband can't take me to the hospital

Well, I can't really do that...I'm a nurse, and I work what are called Baylor shifts--this means I work two double shifts on two consecutive days and get paid 40 hours for that. I have to get here to relieve the nurse from the shift ahead of mine and then stay til the nurse comes in to relieve me. I'm figuring the 55 hours will help keep me and the kids in groceries and the like; I'm REALLY hoping the IRS moves quickly on processing my return and hurries my refund to me!! lol!!! If that happens all will be well, so...
Keep your fingers crossed!
Thank you!
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  #14  
Unread 03-17-2002, 07:26 PM
husband can't take me to the hospital

Believe me my fingers are crossed!
  #15  
Unread 03-17-2002, 08:54 PM
husband can't take me to the hospital

Number13baby--Do you work in a regular hospital? I know the two hospitals that I worked in had a special fund for employees just like you who had a special financial need come up. You could ask your supervisor about it. They would submit the request. Sounds like you have a reasonable request for some help. All the employees had the opportunity to have a certain amount taken out of each paycheck just to help other employees who came up with a financial need. It was a good feeling to know you were helping a fellow employee who had a surgery, illness or death in the family. Just a thought Best wishes and prayers for you.
  #16  
Unread 03-17-2002, 10:11 PM
thank you for your replys

I am thankful for all your replys
I think my daughter is taking me to the hospital and going to stay with me
now I have 12 weeks paid leave on fmla from my job
I work for a very nice company
I drive a forklift my husband works on a line he just recently got promoted and got certified to drive a forklift
I make more money then my husband does
so he will replace me while I am on med.leave
we don't have any children at home I am glad about that

we work a swing shift on the same shift we go to work together we have our breaks together we work 12 hour shifts
we are always together
he can't take off anytime from work cause we need the money
realy hard to explain the way we work
he will work 19th be off the 20th and 21st then have to work nights on the 22nd,23rd,24th so I will be alone at night while he is at work but my kids live real close so if I need anything all I have to do is call and they will come running
my husband will be home till about 7opm and I will take a pain pill and go to sleep and he will be home around 8:30 am and be here all day he will be asleep but I will not be alone during the day
sorry so long
hugs ladypeewee
  #17  
Unread 03-17-2002, 10:11 PM
husband can't take me to the hospital

There is a woman with 4 small children (only one in school). She is a single mom and had to have a hyst. She worked at a job that didn't offer sick pay or any other benifits. She could only afford to take a week and half off of work. That included the surgery and in hospital days, so figure a week off at home. She had NOBODY to help her with the children as she was new in town and didn't know anyone. (Believe me I know this feeling, I am new in town and didn't know anyone after my surgery either, at least not anyone well enough to ask for help or to offer it) This woman took care of her children and was back at work after a week and half off. I never have heard what happened after that though. I was sure I read the post on here but I must have read it somewhere else as I have looked all over on these posts and can't find it.

I happen to be one of those princesses that has 8 weeks off of work. Only a week and a half paid but I have a DH who can cover. It is a VERY tight two months with no paycheck, but I am lucky and can do it. We have had to cut back and haven't been able to start paying any of the Dr. bills yet. However,,,,, I don't worry because I chose to take the 8 weeks for myself and I thank God that I was able to. If I was single there is NO WAY I would have been able to take more than that week and a half off work.

My point .... I have learned a valuable lesson from this. (BTW, I was a single mom with two kids for 3 years and it was hard but I still didn't realize what I have realized since my surgery) If there is EVER an oportunity to help a single mom out in a situation like a hysterectomy or whatever ... I am there!!!!!!!!! I have read all the posts about pampering yourself and take it easy, etc. Until I read that story about the single mom with the 4 kids it just didnt' dawn on me that this surgery hits ANYONE! I CAN NOT imagine having to have to go to work one week after this surgery, or taking care of 4 small children all alone after this surgery, or doing ANYTHING after this surgery without help. I can't help but sit here and think how terribly lonely that must be. How reading posts like that must make a single mom who has no other choice but to work and not take the time for herself that she would love to take, feel. I know at my job we are allowed to take a sick day and donate it to someone who has an emergency and has to be off work. Mine will go to the single mom who needs to take a day off for a sick child, or for herself. I hope we can all think about the single moms out there and how tough something like a hyst must be. Same goes for the woman who isn't single but who has NO time off from her job. This has got to be so hard. Lets keep all these women in our prayers. For me it took reading that story to realize not everyone is as lucky as I have been though this hyster.

Forgive my long post, I just really felt a need to share that story and my thoughts. Thanks and s to everyone.
  #18  
Unread 03-17-2002, 10:30 PM
Empathy

Just a note to echo the last....I, too, single parented for 5 years before I remarried and had another baby. (I now have four kids). I don't have alot of people around to help me as I don't know a lot of people in the are and I am very concerned about my kids' care after I get homje. I will also be on unpaid leave after my surgery. I guess I just wanted to comment that I am glad people are talking about these issues.....I think it point to a need in our culture and society to continue to try and connect with other people and to care about each other. I pray for all of you and hope that even if you don't have any help, you find the strength and stamin to survive it with your sense of humor intact. Also that you find any small way to pamper yourself, even with four little kids hanging around bouncing on the bed (me current fear :-)) Take care and hang in there, everyone.
  #19  
Unread 03-18-2002, 01:47 AM
Will Wake up Alone

ladypeewee,
My husband will be taking me in about an hour. After they take me to surgery, he will be going to work, he doesn't have enough comp time earned and is fighting for a full time postition.
I believe we all learn to make sacrifices when we need to. I also was a single mom and raised 2 wonderful sons. I never got to stay home with them and was blessed to have my mother watch them while I worked. I did however, save and eventually went back to school with the help of a grant and loan that took me 6 years to pay back and now work for a great company and can take all the time I need off. (They say, I work with all men and they don't have a clue surgery or work) I am going to try to go in next week with one of my sons or my husband to pack boxes and I will do the invoicing and shipping. I also do purchasing and all of the quotes, phones, accounting, you name it...... The men I work for/with have told me to not overdue it, they would rather have me healthy and they'll get by.
It sounds like you and your husband have great jobs also and help each other out whatever the need. I'm sure it didn't just "happen" to you but you went out and fought for it. Remember, whether your husband is right there with you or at work or sleeping, you are in his mind or dreams whatever the case would be.
I hope you a speedy recovery and all goes well.
  #20  
Unread 03-18-2002, 02:21 AM
Whining? don't think so

Thank you, Jen, for your wonderful comments...they really hit the nail on the head. My kids are 9,8,4 and 2, and while yes, I suppose I could have aborted them all, I wasn't aware at the time that I would end up a single mom and especially that I'd be a single mom recovering from major surgery while they were the ages they are. I don't think I am whining about the situation; I'm just (understandably I'd say) concerned about how this recovery will work out, and what is entailed, since I haven't had this before and neither have any of my friends. I appreciate this site so much!!! Without it I'd be just adrift.

My job does apparently have some kind of PTO (paid time off) donation program if you are off work for more than four weeks, and the administrator has said she will post a notice for the employees to donate a few hours if they wish. I wonder, though, if very many people here even know who I am, since I work all the weird shifts (evenings and nights on saturday and sunday...I'm like Igor, creeping through the manse!!! Heh heh heh....) and many people work just weekdays. Oh well. So long as I get that tax refund all will be well, all will be well, and all manner of things will be well!

Thank you again, all you supportive Sisters!

:-)
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