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Unread 03-21-2002, 09:24 PM
crazy and confused

Ok... nobody laugh. I only have 5 days and 5 hrs. until I have to be at the hospital. Please tell me if this is normal or am I just loosing my mind.

My husband says I am crazy (not in a bad way) I get side tracked very easily,I talk in circles and I end up confusing my self. Also I am very forgetful. I have managed to get the majority of my list of "Things to do" done, but I feel like I am loosing my mind. I have probably been to the grocery store 3 times in the last week. I even went twice today. I tell my DH that I just want to make sure he and dd,ds,and dd have enough food to last the a week or two. He says I am over doing it a little bit. He keeps telling me he will manage.

I told him I was going to cook and freeze some meals,and I think he took it the wrong way because he said "Do you think that I am not capable of taking care of Us?" I told him I was just trying to make it easier on them.

At one point tonight he told me I was acting very loopy and I started to cry.(I didn't let him see because I know he wasn't trying to be mean) I guess my nerves are on edge.

Please tell me, am I crazy?
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Unread 03-21-2002, 09:35 PM
crazy and confused

Hi, BjS3/27,

No, I don't think you're crazy. I think that contemplating a hysterectomy is a very emotional time in a woman's life.

Just thinking about having surgery made me nervous, and I was a little scared, to be honest. Also, I felt like I had to make lots of preparations, so my family and my house would be OK, while I was recovering. I cleaned house, made some meals to freeze, shopped, etc. I was a cleanin', cookin', frenzied fool for a few days!

As the day of my surgery approached, I slowed down, though. I spent some time just enjoying the people I love. I did things that made me feel good, like walking in the park, buying myself a few luxury items, and taking a warm bath every night, just because I enjoyed those things. Also I prayed. When I walked into that hospital, I had found peace within myself. I was ready for surgery, and I knew that God would take care of me. And He did.

Along with making preparations for your family and your household, I would urge you to take some time to prepare yourself. You'll feel better, after your surgery, if you aren't exhausted. Take time to get in touch with yourself, and your feelings. Do some things that you enjoy. Your family will survive. Your house will still stand. Be kind to yourself, and the rest will take care of itself.

Good luck with your surgery, and I'm sending you

Healing hugs,
Unread 03-22-2002, 01:03 AM
You are not alone

Dear BJS,
I feel the same way. I think I have been crazy and confused for too long. I am sure that the when the hysterectomy is over I will again be able to accomplish something.

This has been a difficult year with much stress, in addition to medical problems. I also feel that I am tired of being needy. First I had the D&C and thinking that would solve my problem I scheduled needed shoulder surgery for a few weeks after the D&C. When I found out that I needed the hysterectomy I thought of cancelling the shoulder surgery, but decided I would need my strong arms to lift my body off the bed after the hysterectomy, so the shoulder was repaired last week. Can't use my arm fully yet, but with a few weeks of physical therapy will should do fine.

I need some help at home and decided since I have a husband and grown children they could help. Wrong. This last weekend everyone came over to help, plus their friends came by to visit them so the house was even busier. I couldn't relax or sleep it was too noisy. I sent everyone home on Monday and have decided that when I have the hysterectomy my husband will be the only one to help me recover, he doesn't clean or cook, but he does know how to microwave. I just have to figure out how many days he should be. off of work to help me. If anyone has ideas as to how long I will need bed rest at home please let me know.

Also, the D&C wasn't difficult to recover from the anesthesia, but the recovery from the shoulder has been much more difficult. I didn't want to wake up in the recovery room. I was aware that people were around me but I didn't want to respond. Then a few days later I developed bronchitis and ended in the emergency room for a night because I couldn't breathe. It was scary and I am now concerned about the next surgery. Will I be able to wake up and will I have a breathing problem?

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Unread 03-22-2002, 03:27 AM
crazy and confused

How much time your husband needs to be home with you really depends on you. Mine took a weeks vacation after I got home. He was really there to take are of our baby grandson while our dd worked, I personally don't like to be fussed over, so if the baby hadn't been here I wouldn't have minded if dh had gone to work. But he is only 5 minutes away so he could have gotten home in case of an emergency. And he comes home every day for lunch. It was about a week and a half before I'd take a shower when no one was home, I felt a little unsteady standing that long.

When you are by yourself make sure the phone is always within reach, and when you are walking take it with you, just in case of an emergency.

About the waking up and breathing problems - make sure you explain to the anesthesiologist and let him know your fears, he can do a lot to reassure you.

Trust me you're not crazy. As soon as my hyst was scheduled (just before Christmas for Feb 5) I started stocking up on EVERYTHING. I kept going to the grocery store, and the Sunday before surgery even dragged my dh on an expedition to a Super Wal-Mart, although we didn't need anything and couldn't fit anymore in the freezer, refrig or cupboards. I was sure everyone was going to starve to death (especially the cat). My husband is very comfortable with cooking and laundry, it's the grocery store he's not crazy about - something about spending money.
Unread 03-22-2002, 04:48 AM
lost in fog too...

I am so glad to see that I am not the only one that is having a I also go around trying to get things done and forgetting stuff. I start something and then think of something else and forget the first thing. I have been starting sentences and then forgetting what I was going to say. My husband thinks I have lost my mind and he was teasing me about it in the doctor's office and the doctor overheard it and asked if I was having any mental problems because of everything I had been going through! I think he was considering shipping me off to the funny farm!
The worse part is, I started to tell him to send me!
And why is it that I was fine about the surgery before, (even had to fight to get it) and I soon as I got a date, I freaked out! Now I am a nervous, forgetful, sad, sappy,short tempered mess!
Go figure.....
Unread 03-22-2002, 06:00 AM
crazy and confused

I too have been feeling this same way...
But at the same time I seem to be procrastinating.(like being on here when I should be cleaning!) I have my pre-op this morning and I guess maybe in the back of my mind I'm thinking when I see my Dr. She'll tell me there was a mistake or something and i really don't have to do it afterall:confuse: So why get everything ready! DUH! I know my patterns and will for sure be rushing around even more blindly come monday. I have read the waiting is the worst. I am going to hold on to that one one!
Well my sisters in waiting.... Best wishes, to us all! Heres to us in the days to come with clearer minds and better (feeling)bodies
Unread 03-22-2002, 08:03 AM
I'm a 3/27 sister also!

No I don't think your crazy........just stressed. I have notice a little forgetfulness myself! Last Sunday I scrubbed a kitchen floor on my hands and knees........just had to get it really clean, because I know a mop won't touch it for the next four weeks.

I am loading up on stuff thats easy to bar-b-que for my family. They like it and it is easy for my DH. I will be grocery shopping on Tuesday a.m. to lay in supplies for my time away at the castle, however, I will bet it will be take out every night!!!

Since we are the "caretakers" in our families we feel compelled to put everything in order. We are not used to being the one needing care!!!!

Mentally I am very ready to get this done, pre-op appt.w/doc yesterday answered my remaining questions, must shop today for a new robe and slippers for the castle. (Don't want to look like a ragamuffin!)

I wish you peace of mind and a great castle experience! I will be thinking of you on our day!!!
Unread 03-22-2002, 08:03 AM
crazy and confused

Hi all you LIW. I am 4 days post op and experienced the exact same feelings and thoughts. Like every sister before me ,I want to add : The waiting really is the worse part. As for me , I know every one is different , but it was far less as bad as I had imagined. The pain was very controlled , I am feeling great , trying to be a good princess and rest rest rest !!!
Keep getting support from this site. I hope your experience is as good if not better than mine. I am so glad that I did not talk myself out of it. I can't wait to actually wear white shorts this summer and go any where I want and not have to worry about having to wear a depend to protect mYself. I feel I have taken controll of my life again. Best Wishes to you !!!
Unread 03-22-2002, 08:52 AM
waiting is the worse

All you LIW, just keep saying to yourself,
Waiting is the Worse, because it is.
I had a TVH-BSO monday 18 and this is
Friday and i'm going back to work next week
to do paperwork a few hours a day
because if I don't, I'll be doing
more than that around the house. I had been
thru so many problems for 3+ years to name.
Last night though, I actually slept from 11:00 p.m.
until 5:30 a.m. and I feel like a million dollars.
I think the worse pain is GAS........ and it's like a
cramp, nothing like what I felt before.
I hope you all feel as good as I do now when you
are done with the surgery but, it's the best thing
I've ever done for myself.
Unfortunately, there is nothing that anyone can say
or do to help with the waiting but, one of the best
things I did was go to dinner and a movie the weekend
before surgery and spent that weekend pampering
myself and not "taking care" of ""everything"" else.
Prayers are with all of you.

Unread 03-22-2002, 01:48 PM
crazy and confused

Hi there bjs3/27,

I'm with you on the whole "scatter-brain" thing. I'm trying not to over-react and, yet, I'm trying to anticipate everything I'll need. My SO will be there for my surgery but will be working for the next 4 days straight. Thank goodness I'm having a lap procedure so I shouldnt have such a hard time getting around the house. My 9 year old dd has agreed to bring me PB&J sandwiches and juice when I need it. I will probably go to Walmart and get some stuff...gas-x, stool softners, etc this weekend. Then maybe another trip to the grocery store. But, I'm also going to get my eybrows waxed, see a movie, and some fun stuff this weekend before I go under "the knife"....I dont know what they call the poker thing in a lap procedure...LOL. Take care of yourself sis, it will be ok.


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