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My anxious husband My anxious husband

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Unread 04-04-2002, 01:25 PM
My anxious husband

Hello sisters:

This is my first post. I really enjoy this site and have been reading it every day for several weeks now. My TAH/BSO is on April 9. I think my husband is more worried about it than I am. This will be my 8th surgery (5 "C" sections, a hernia repair and back surgery) so both of us know what we are getting into at least surgery wise. I am sure this is why my husband is so concerned. Just now on my lunch hour he wanted to see the booklet the Pre-op nurse had given me on hysterectomies, and was questioning HRT. He is already telling me what I can and can't do after I come home. I know that he is just worried about me and wishes this doesn't have to be done. There is a slight worry that I have ovarian cancer. All of you know that the waiting is the worst part and I am having a hard time keeping my emotions controlled anyway, and as strange as it might sound, his concern is almost making it harder.

I don't know if any of this makes any sense - except does anyone out there have an idea how I can ease his mind so he won't worry so much?
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Unread 04-04-2002, 01:36 PM
My anxious husband

Marta, Do you belong to a church? PRAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Im serious! My hubbie was worried too. He drove my teens his family and my family nuts!They must work throught this in there own strange way. Women chat and vent. Guys normally don't discuss these things with the guys!Women do! Takecare.Angela
Unread 04-04-2002, 05:12 PM
Anxious Husbands

Hi Marta,

I too am having my surgery on April 9th. Noon to be exact!

I can totally understand where you are coming from. I was telling my husband on the way home from work today (we carpool) about some of the things that I have been reading on this website. I mentioned the HRT and he got quiet. He continued to let me talk a while then he said, "you know, you REALLY need to listen to your Dr. tomorrow (pre-op visit) and stop telling him what YOU want to do and if he says that you need to keep your Ovaries, then that's what you should do - he knows." My point for having everything taken out, is because I don't want to leave anything in there to chance. I have the worse luck (medically speaking). I do NOT want to have to but cut on again at a later date because I have growths of Cysts or Fibriods.

As it is, I have had 3 C-sections, Traditional Gall Bladder surgery (two weeks after my 2nd C-section), Tubal Ligation, DNC and Tonsilectomy (as a teenager), I also have Diabetes which is not controlled (like I should have it). So as you can see... I am not in the best of health - which is one of my DH's concerns. He's even gone as far as think I might not be so fortunate to make it through it (not to be morbid - just he is suffering anxiety over this and knows my health history). Plus he (and my girls) are afraid of my pending hormonal fluctuations. They already call me the PMS Queen. I kind of worry about this myself!

I am increasingly anxious as days disappear and the 9th nears. I am researching and reading ALL posts to see what to expect and talk about all this to anyone who will listen.

I also spend a lot of time praying too! I know things will be fine, but I just have to work on my anxiety. Bottom line, all we can do is take one day at a time. Rest, rest, rest is what I am being told we have to do. Also, we only get one chance to heal right - do EVERYTHING that you are suppose to do and keep a positive attitude.

I wish you the best of luck with your surgery.

Hugs to all Hyster Sisters -

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Unread 04-05-2002, 08:44 AM
My anxious husband

Don't feel like you are alone. I am scheduled to have a LAVH on April 15 and my husband is also worrying himself silly. I wish I could help him but I just can't. I too think that guys have there own way of dealing with things.

Best of luck on your surgery.


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