Seeking Advice...

I am thirty-two, mother of three, work full-time and go to college 3/4 to full-time - getting BA to advance in career. I am scheduled for surgery - TAH, at this point we are hoping to leave at least one of the ovaries, in two weeks and was told that I would need 6 weeks for recovery, two being with no driving. Currently I am planning on returning to classes two weeks after surgery, is this unrealistic??? My work schedule is extremely flexible, so this isn't a problem.

Another concern of mine is about sex. Some have told me that sex is better, others have said much worse, as in lack of interest. I have not had a chance to talk to my dr. about it yet. Is there a way to combat the problem, if it indeed happens?

Sorry to ramble, I am a little nervous about the whole thing!

Thanks!!

Each of us is very different, but in my opinion, going back to classes at 2 weeks isn't very realistic.

I can definitely say that there is no way I could have done it. I had a TAH two years ago. I was 28 years old at the time, and in excellent physical condition. I didn't really think the doctor could be right when she said 6 weeks at home, but she was! At 2 weeks, I was still barely shuffling around my home, VERY slowly, all bent over.

At 2-3 weeks, all the internal sutures (and there are TONS of them) are just starting to dissolve. All those tissues and ligaments that were cut and stitched must start holding themselves together again, so this is a very fragile time in our healing.

I know it is very difficult to put your life on hold, but it is so important that you allow your body the time it needs to heal. I have been on these message boards for over two years now, and have seen so many women end up delaying their recovery, or even ending up being hospitalized again, due to doing too much in their first 3-4 weeks. Please take good care of yourself!

As far as sex, in my case, sex is wonderful post-op! Hopefully, since you will be keeping at least one ovary, things shouldn't be any different for you. However, if you do experience difficulties, talk to your doctor. There are things that can help (such as hormone therapy).

Good luck, and keep posting your questions - we'll do our best to help!

In my experience, I think returning to school at two weeks post-op would be difficult. Generally speaking, you will most likely be very tired for at least the first 4 weeks. I had LAVH and did not return to work for 6 weeks, and then it was part-time. Everyone heals differently, I finally felt like I had most of my strength back by about 10 weeks.

As far as the sex issue---it is soooo individual with all of us, and I've heard many different responses too---some say they have lost their libido, others say it's much better, some say it didn't change at all. Hormonal balance has a lot to do with it, in addition to healing from the trauma of major surgery. I was unable to keep my ovaries, which put me into surgical menopause, which indeed, affected my libido for awhile. I've been working on finding the right balance with HRT and things are beginning to improve.

It's a very good idea to keep one or both ovaries if they are healthy. Definitely discuss your options with your doctor.

Welcome to this site---you will find lots of answers and support here!

Shelley

You may want to do like I have done. My surgery is Sept 3. and classes began Aug 5 but all of my classes are Distance Learning. This helps because I don't have to drive to the site. This is something to consider.

Well now if I were your age I would ask my doctor what he suggests about the ovaries. I am 53 and mine were tired and worn out, so out they went. At your age I would hope to keep them or at least one of them.

I had an abdominal hysterectomy on April 8th of this year. I am an old hand at surgeries this being my 5th bikini cut. I have to say in all honesty, I see no way you can go to classes at 2 weeks post op. I had my daugther with me for 3 1/2 weeks. She did the laundry, food shopping, vacuuming, the things we just can't do. Plus I wasn't cleared for driving until the 3rd week. You will be very tired and need to rest at 2 weeks post op. You only have one chance to heal properly - take it. You can go to school when you are back to your perky old self.

I'm not trying to scare you, but you only have this one chance to heal properly and one chance to get your energy back.

Now as far as sex, well I don't know if it is the Premarin or what - but I am ***** all the time. It could be my age, menapause, I don't know - but I am in the mood 24/7/ Hope that helps you....

Good luck with your surgery and hope to see you in chat soon. Paula xxoo

Hi Hedgehog!

Please follows your doctor's orders about resuming your regular activities. Based on my own experience, I think going back to school after two weeks may be a little unrealistic, also. I am two weeks post op right now and I had a LAVH, which should be a little faster recovery than TAH like you will have. I am still having to take presc. pain med at least once a day. I definitely wouldn't want to drive while taking it, as I don't think it would be safe. My energy level is maybe 20-30% of normal, I would guess.

I know everyone heals differently, but please heed the advice of many others that have been through this. This is major surgery, no small procedure. I know we as women often think we have to be "superwomen" in so many aspects of our lives, but I believe this is one time you need to put your health first. You certainly wouldn't want to end up back in the hospital and delay your recovery even longer.

Best wishes to you and here's a big !

Denise

I am now in the process of changing my class schedule. I have cut down to two classes, one is on-line and the other is in video format. After reading everyone's wonderful replies and the posts on this board, I decided that I was not facing reality. It wouldn't be worth the strain it would put on my body. What was I thinking?? I had four classes plus worked full-time last spring year and it was an effort. I have had my fall all mapped out for some time and this really puts a new spin on things. I knew it was coming eventually, my DR and I talked about it five years ago. However, I was avoiding it like the plague. Even now I don't want to think about it and it's only two weeks away. And it's not that I am planning to have more children, but the whole event scares me...

Sorry, I am rambling again!

Dear Hedgehog,

You sound so sweet. And it is very perfectly normal to "ramble" here. We do it all the time. Let not your heart be troubled.
May I please be so humble as to say that the advice that you will receive and the reading you do here, is the best in the world. I know that it does not take the place of a physician, but it is very credible.

I will just come out and tell you very bluntly that you may be very perfectly fine at two weeks. The two week point isn't the problem. Something happens around the third week which is called "The Wall" on this site. I read about it. I researched it, but I didn't understand it until I hit it. Beware and prepare. Ask for alot of help.

Please understand that you must not bend over for six weeks. Do not sit for very long. Sitting is an excercise. Lay down.
I am very, very ancient. I did what I was told. I was told not to bend over. Do not. You only have one chance to heal. There are literally thousands of healing things going on inside you. Nothing else will matter if you delay your recovery and have to go back in for surgery. I am not trying to scare you, but I have read on this site that it happens. Bring extra pillows for yourself, and alot of candy for the nurses. Let us know how you are doing. And do not forget to drink alot of water.
Much love,
Margo

Hi Hedgehog,

As of today I am three weeks post-op and though I feel that I have healed very quickly and further along in my recovery than I thought I would be, I find that the two hardest things for me still are standing (walking is okay) and sitting straight up in a regular chair for any period of time. I can sit at the dinner table long enough to eat dinner and then I have to go sit in my recliner. I can't imagine sitting up in a chair for an hour or two hour class. Everyone is different and you may feel like it, but I wouldn't plan on it, just kind of play it by ear. My concern would be if you plan on going back and two weeks and then find that you can't you're just setting yourself up for disappointment.

Take care of you. Class will still be there at three or four weeks!

Better and better...

Gillian

Hedgehog,

The ladies here have given you good advise. Everyone is different. Have you ever had any abdomenal surgery before? How did you bounce back from that? That won't tell you exactly how you will recover from this one, but will give you an idea.

At 2 wks I was feeling fine. I was out spending way too much time and money at the mall. BUT... what I couldn't do was sit for long periods of time. I did fine with walking and moving around, but not sitting. And you won't be able to carry anything more than 5 or 10 pounds (lots of college texts are heavier than that) and you shouldn't be bending over.

I don't think you can count on being back in class in two weeks. The idea of distance learning classes is a great one. any chance of doing that this session?

Good luck.

caren