Dear Hystersisters.....I need your help!!!!

I could really use some support. I feel like such a Big Cry baby! I'm still hurting! I've had 2 abdominal surgeries in the last 7 months! I feel like the "cure" is worse than the "ailment". I now put alot more credence in "Murphy's Law"...........at the ABSOLUTE worst time.......EVERYTHING will go sour! I will NEVER have another surgery unless it is life preserving!!

I have been hanging around these boards an awful long time now. It's bad when you see posts from women who were on here at the same time as you when you had your Hyst. and think .."WOW!, I haven't seen her in a long time", am I'm STILL here. I feel like a kid who all of their friends have moved up to the next grade and I am held back.

I really think that it is never going to end for me and I am just going to have to learn to live with it. I pray every night that this is not rue.

Most of you know the road I've traveled, so I will try not to go into great detail.....BUT.....I had a hsyt in June of 2002 for unrelenting pelvic pain on my left side........had the hyst and RSO..(don't ask me why I had an "R"SO when all my pain was on the left and the doc was supposed to do an LSO. I don't know what the H*** he was thinking). Regardless, I ended up back in surgery in December for the same left sided pelvic pain, most likely the culprit was the fact that I had an inguinal hernia on the left side that went undiagnosed. In my second abdominal surgery, the doc found extensive adhesions, everything was glued together, VERY likely another source of my post-op pain.

I am now 1 day past 8 weeks post and I still have pain on my left side that seems to be getting worse instead of better. My current doc says I must be very prone to adhesions considering the amount of them that he removed during my last OP just 6 months after the last. I am at wits end with this continuing pain and I don't know what to do about it. I CANNOT have surgery every 6 months to stop this pain!!!!

I am seeing a PM doc,(and I do LOVE him to death...until now he has been great!) but I think he is tired of seeing me..............last week he put me on methadone for my pain....it was WAY too stong and made me sick as a dog........(and high as a kite!..I can't function like that!)..I tried it with phenegran and without..with food and without...I tried a half....3/4.... and then a whole.....and I just CAN'T take it. I went to see him today and he put me on Talwin........(you sisters are the only ones that I discuss my pain meds with! Definitely NOT DH!)....went and had them filled only to find out that I can't take them because I am allergic to aspirin which is a contraindication. Severly allergic........send me to the ER allergic!! Luckily my pharmacist was kind enough to refund me my money. So now I have NOTHING for pain. My PM doc is only in for 2 hours tomorrow so he can't see me because his schedule is full.....I understand that ,really I do......there are not nearly enough Dr's who are skilled in pain management.....but what am I to do about my pain UNTIL he can see me? He stays booked up at least a couple of weeks in advance. I have an appointment with him next wednesday.....but if I could make it a full week without meds then I wouldnt need to see him at all!

I can't go on like this......I just can't! I still feel like I am carrying something around in my stomach on the left side...it just feels HEAVY and hurts when I move , bend or turn! Driving is a MAJOR chore! I think I am going to have to sell my car and buy an automatic. Does anyone know what I am talking about? Does this sound familiar to ANYONE????

Making matters worse is that I am going through a very UGLY divorce .....we are still living together although I have been sleeping on the couch for about 6 months now and we have been keeping our monies seperate as well and split the bills.(Not fairly but we do split them!) My DH fell asleep on the couch one day last week and I thought "good"! I get to sleep in the bed tonight"..but as soon as I got to sleep...he came into the bedroom and told me to get out of "HIS" bed............rather than argue I just went to the couch. I am tired of his crap and I could handle this MUCH easier if I weren't dealing with all this pain at the same time!

For those of you who have listened to me whine for the last 5 months.....Thank YOU!!!! I really appreciate your support.....for those of you who don't know mmy plight....keep in mmind that I am probably an isolated case.

Sisters thanks so much for your support. I realize that you can't give me answers....but knowing that I am not alone sure does help.

Lots of to you all!

Dawn

(((Dawn))), I hear ya. My hysterversary was yesterday, and today I found out I'm most likely having another surgery within the next month or so. I'm on toradol and heavy antibiotics now. Oh well!

Ya know, some of us just seem to get all the breaks I have to look at it this way... this will give me more of a chance to really get to know everyone here.

For perspective, though, I hang out on the Road Less Traveled a lot. There are ladies there who are only there out of sheer grit and determination not to let all this conquer them. I want to be like them!

Come here and vent any time, sweetie, that's what we're here for. Just remember you are among friends here, and together we will make each other stronger.

-Linda

awww Dawn Honey...


I sure hate to hear your still dealing with all this pain...and then to add unkind docs to the problem just makes it even worse.

Why can't this doc call in a perscription to tide you over till you can get into to see him? What about your primary doc can he do something to help till you can get into pain management?
What about going to ER? That could also help with the pain management doc taking you a little bit more seriously. Going to ER is what gave my docs a wake up call. And when was the last time they did a trans-vaginal ultra sound sweetie? or a CT Scan?

I'm wondering if maybe the mesh for the hernia didn't take or came apart? If your body is rejecting it it will cause a lot of pain. I would think they would want to investagate this and see what's up. On the other hand has anyone mentioned ovarian remnant? A lot of your sympoms sound a lot like mine....Heavy feeling, pain with the bending or turning...of course the adhesions were there for me to but with the remnant having cysts on them this just compounded the problem.

Keep hanging on the road honey just as Linda suggests...I hung out there for so long when I didn't post the girls grew worried. We'er a tight bunch over there and are there to support and hug whenever we can....I know it's hard to want to post when we see sisters going thru what we feel is more than we are, But that's not the case at all and being in pain and needing support is what the road is all about. The girls had told me many many times that pain is pain, doesn't matter whos' is worse or lasts longer.

We'er here for you Dawn....and we'll hold your hand as best we can and help where we can....I do hope you know that.


Linda....Just wanted to pop in with a word of caution on the Toradol. It will severly damage your liver and kidneys if taken to long. Or at least this is what the research tells me. I was on Torodal...( what a wonder drug for me!!!!) for almost 6 months. when the Oncologist found it she freaked and said stop immed. Come to find out your only supposed to take it for five days after IV therapy with it. Just be careful sweetie....

to both of you....in a really big way..


Dawn

Dawn,

So sorry to hear you're still in pain. You have so much on your plate right now it must be hard to know what's what. I'm sure you've tried everything for pain but I'll mention some of what I do anyway - hot baths, cold packs, massage, acupuncture - in case something strikes you that you've forgotten.

You're handling so many things at the moment all I can think of is that things WILL get better because you're making changes. You might not get ALL better, but eventually things will get manageable. Just has to, right?

I guess that might not help much for now, but know we're all thinking of you here.

Joselle

My, my, my... you got too much on your plate right now between the docs, pain and your hubby. If that the attitude he has then he is not such a DH to you in any way. I am sitting here just shaking my head. What is wrong with your hubby for not being considerate and understanding. He slept on your couch so whats the problem? This irks me quite a bit. I am really sorry that you have to go through this. It seems it is not fair.

Hang on there and we are here for you. Come here as often as you want and vent and cry out your heart. We all will listen to ya!


Dale

I don't know how I would have made it this far without the support of you wonderful sisters. It really helps to not feel so alone.

Dawn, I know I should really go see my gyn about this pain and maybe he would do a trans vaginal, but I'm not sure that I really want to know what's wrong. Sad..but I'm really hoping for adhesions, but I have to wonder if it's the hernia mesh, I had to go to the ER the night after I was released from the castle because I'd had a severe allergic reaction to something and they still don't know what the reaction was caused by. I really feel like a whiner and don't want to go back to my gyn whining about pain still. It doesnt help that his receptionist is a friend of mine who went back to work after only 2 weeks after her hyst and has been just fine ever since.

4bears.........My DH really angers me as well, I never knew until I had my hyst that he could be so cold and heartless. I swore after my last divorce that I would never marry again, but then I met my current DH, we dated for almost 2 years before we wed and I felt like I really knew him, I guess not. I never felt more degraded than I do by the way he has been treating me. I couldnt believe he would make me get out of that bed.........I'm usually tough and stick to my guns, but my children have been through so much lately that I didnt want them to be awoken in the middle of the to the sound of us arguing. You really find out who your true frinds are and who truly loves you and who doesn't. I will never be able to forgive him.

Thanks for all of your support ladies, it means so much to me.

Dawn

For sure. Your problems will be all your own, no compounding from without, and your resources to deal with them will seem less compromised. A bad marriage is hell itself.