HysterSisters Hysterectomy Support and Information
Advertising Info HysterSisters Hysterectomy Support Tutorial

Go Back   Hysterectomy HysterSisters > Pre-Op Hysterectomy Articles

HysterSisters Articles for Hysterectomy


SHARING IS CARING

Explaining Your Hysterectomy to Children

From the Pre-Op Hysterectomy Articles List

Woman explaining hysterectomy to her childrenI’m having a hysterectomy next week and my problem is my 6-year-old son. How do I explain to him what is going to happen to me? I’ve tried to talk to him and he cries and doesn’t want me to go. I am so worried about him.


Many mothers of young children have dealt with the same issue you describe. The following are suggestions and sentiments on this topic shared through the years by members of Hystersisters.com:
  • “My son knew for two months that his mommy was very tired and sick, so I told him that I was going to go to the hospital for a couple of days to get better, and that did it. I felt that, at 6 years of age, he didn’t need to know about all the cuts and stitches. It's not changing the truth -- it is treating a 6-year-old as a 6-year-old.”

  • ”I had my son build me something with his Legos, to take to the hospital with me. He also got to pick out a stuffed animal to keep me company. Let him be a part of it -- but try to make it an adventure, not something he will be so afraid of.”

  • “Before my surgery, I told my son that I had a pain in my belly and the doctor was going to make it better, and that I needed him to be a big boy and maybe he can help afterwards. It’s always hard to give advice about kids since they're all so different, and what works for one may not work for another.”

  • “I explained to my kids that hospitals are where doctors fix people. I then told them that I would have surgery and that the doctor wants me to stay at the hospital for 3 or 4 days to make sure everything is good. My 6 year-old son certainly did not want to hear any details about the cutting and stapling. He did want to know why I was having it done. I explained that things were not working right and it caused me pain. They were still upset about me being in the hospital. Nothing you do or say can completely take away the anxiety. I think it is important to acknowledge it and tell your children that you will miss them, too.”

  • “Don’t give too much information. A child's greatest fear is losing a parent. Downplay it as much as possible. Just say that you will be gone to the hospital for a few days and when you get back your stomach will be sore and you might need his help. Answer his questions, but only give the basics. Be sure to reassure him that you will be just fine. Have him come up with ideas of things that he can do for you when you return. Children love to be helpful and feel needed, but most of all, they need to feel secure that you will be okay.”

  • “I have a 7-year-old son who was also very upset about my surgery. He cried often, and I was more worried about him than about myself. I found that just spending extra quality time with him before surgery was more calming to him than the talks.”

  • “I struggled, too, as to what to tell my 7-year-old daughter. I finally decided to tell her that Mommy was going in the hospital so they could make me better and I wouldn’t hurt anymore. She seemed okay with that. We talked about it whenever she felt like it. I tried to answer her truthfully, yet gently, and in words she could understand. I also informed her teacher about the surgery, and forewarned her that my daughter may be a bit anxious for the next few days.”

There are some good books available about hospitals and surgery, and it's often easier to explain if you have a book to help. For younger children (age 3–7), "When Mommy Had a Mastectomy," by Nancy Reuben Greenfield, and "Dakota's Mom Goes to the Hospital" by Annie Thiel have been recommended. For older children (8-preteen), "Let's Talk About When Someone You Love Is in the Hospital" by Marianne Johnston might be helpful.



This content was written by staff of HysterSisters.com by non-medical professionals based on discussions, resources and input from other patients for the purpose of patient-to-patient support.

08-21-2007 - 02:14 PM


SHARING IS CARING


Do you have a question?

If you have a medical support question related to this article, come JOIN US in our HysterSisters Community Forums. You will receive helpful replies to your questions from our members. See you there!


HysterSisters Free Hysterectomy Booklet

What 350,000 Women Know About Hysterectomy with pages of information, helpful tips and hints to prepare and recover from hysterectomy. Free download for members.




HysterSisters Articles

Diagnosis
Options to Hysterectomy
Treatment Alternatives
Pre-Op Hysterectomy
Post-Op Hysterectomy
Separate Surgeries
Hormone and Menopause
Intimacy after Hysterectomy
Pelvic Floor
Separate Surgeries
Fitness after Hysterectomy
GYN Cancer
Breast Health
Grief and Loss
Endometriosis
Uterine Fibroids
GYN Genetics
Hysterectomy Stories
Ask A Doctor




Find a Surgeon

HysterSisters Doctor Directory
Susan D. Hunter, M.D.
626 Ed Carey Dr
Harlingen TX 78550
956-428-4868
Theresa Holladay, M.D.
War Memorial Hospital Women’s Health
509 Osborn Blvd., Suite 120
Sault St Marie MI 49783
906-635-3002
James Kondrup, M.D.
161 Riverside Drive
Suite 109
Binghamton NY 13905
607-770-7074
Geoffrey Cly, M.D.
Suite 101, 11123 Parkview Plaza Drive
Fort Wayne IN 46845
260-969-5530
Aileen Caceres, M.D.
Center for Specialized Gynecology/Florida Hospital
410 Celebration Place, Suite 302
Celebration FL 34747
(407) 303-4573
Caren C Reaves, M.D.
Caring for Women
2805 S. Mayhill Rd
Denton TX 76208
940-591-6700
Antonio Gargiulo, M.D.
Brigham and Women's Hospital
75 Francis Street
Boston MA 02115
617-732-4222
Jonas Wilson-Leedy, M.D.
71 Prospect Avenue
Hudson NY 24016
518-828-1400
Charles Miller, M.D.
120 Osler Drive
Suite 100
Naperville IL 60540
630-428-2229

Advertisement

Hysterectomy News

August 3,2020

CURRENT NEWS

HysterSisters Takes On Partner To Manage Continued Growth And Longevity
I have news that is wonderful and exciting! This week’s migration wasn’t a typical migration - from one set ... News Archive

TODAY'S EVENTS

Calendar - Hysterectomies - Birthdays


Request Information


I am a HysterSister

HYSTERECTOMY STORIES

Featured Story - All Stories - Share Yours

FOLLOW US


Your Hysterectomy Date


CUSTOMIZE Your Browsing  



Advertisement


Advertisement