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df323's Blog
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The journey begins 06-08-2007 - 06:39 AM
After three years of pain (nothing compared to what some women have endured here) I have decided to take a step to fix it. I am scared, terrified, exctied and estatic all in one. I, of course, am anxious about having such a major surgery and the recovery that will be involved. But at the same time, I am so excited that the pain may soon be over.

I have had three children, which I thank god for every day. I can only imagine what women who have not but have wanted to, have to go through with this decision. I did have 2 pregnancies with complications and it would be too risky for myself and an unborn child to endure it again. At least there will be no more fear and stress where that is concerned. I deleveloped aggressive severe dysplasia when my youngest was 7 months old. Had I gone the few more months to my next scheduled annual I was told it would have been full blown cancer. I went through cone biopsies and the LEEP procedure followed by paps every 3 months for a year and then every 6 months for the following 2. I have had no abnormal results sine then but I will be so happy to not have that stress in my life anymore also.

On January 10th 2004 I had what was presumably a cyst to rupture. It started with progressive cramping to where I was curled up in tears not being able to move. I would never wish that one my worst enemy. I would rather go through delivering 10 more kids then to go through that again. Apparently though the cyst was in an odd place as that is what started all of my problems. I had never been one to cramp or have heavy periods by any means. I was lucky in that aspect. But after the cyst the pain just never went away. For the first year after that the drs all thought I was nuts. they wouldn't accept the fact I was in pain nor did they do anything about it other then put me on estrogen-based bc pills which I would find out until 9 months ago was the worst thing they could do!

I had a lap done in March 2005 where my heart dropped afterwards when the dr came out and told my dh and I that he found nothing. He did do biopsies throughout my abdominal area to see what would come up but everything looked fine to him. I was so depressed after that. I KNEW I was in pain and no one understood it or seemed to believe me. Well the biopsies came back positive for microscopic endometriosis and endosalpingiosis. The cyst the ruptured apparently threw cells from the uterus and fallopian tubes throughout my abdomen which is where they impanted and found a new happy home. The only option I was given after that was Lupron. My insurance wouldn't cover it and ther was no physical way for us to come up with $600 every 28 days to pay for the shots. So I just suffered with it. Hysterectomy was never even mentioned as an option for me until recently.

After having a 3 month marathon of bleeding constantly the dr just told me to keep continually taking the bc pills without the weeks off (now at this point I had only had probably 6 official periods in 2 years). He wasnted me to follow up with him in a couple weeks so when I heard they couldn't schedule me in for another 3 months I hit the roof. There was no way I was going to bleeding for another 3 months with no help. So i went and talked to friends, did some research and found a new dr. last fall. He was a god-send!!! He completely justified my pain and reassured me it was real and I wasn't nuts (just needed the confirmation at this point.. hahaha). The FIRST thing he did was change me to progesterone only bc pills. He was shocked that the first dr had me on estrogen based pills since that encourages endo growth. That ws something I was ignorant on in the beginning. So here I am 3 years later. I have had progressively worse pain, sometimes it seems worse every day. I can not wait for this to all be over. I can not wait until I can be a better wife and mother. I am tired of surrendering my life to the pain. So now the journey begins.
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