Beginning to freak out

Hello All
I am not having my surgery until Feb 22 and I already beginning to freak out. I went for my second opinion yesterday and he confirmed what I already knew. So because I am trying to be responsible I am going to get the flu shot (something I don't normally get) Mondat to protect myself since my resistance will be lower during that time. I am TERRIFIED of needles so this is not an easy feat for me.
I have not told my daughter, who is in the Navy and overseas, yet b/c she is preparing for a very important test but I will tell her after the test in 2 weeks. It is hard not telling her when we talk but my husband and I agree that waiting is best.
I have never stayed overnight at the hospital and never had surgery of this degree.
I am struggling with whether I should have the ovaries removed or should I keep 1 since the other has a mass on it (they don't believe it's cancer but it is irregular so it needs to come out). If I have them both removed then I will probably need HRT and I am nervous about that b/c I have an Aunt who died from breast cancer.
I am so afraid of becoming this blubbering, angry, nasty woman, mother who will be depressed. I have a history of depression and I can't go through that again.
I am trying to be positive but I am scared right now.

Hi,
I think getting the flu shot is a great idea, since hospital's have lots of germs. I understand your fears, it's scary to have a major surgery and especially if you've never had anything done before. You didn't say why you had to have the hysterectomy. I am hoping to keep my ovaries even though I get cysts every month and that won't change after the surgery. I also understand your hesitation about HRT, I don't know a lot about that but someone on here will tell you more. I have read lots of posts from other women about natural hormone's too. I think there is a forum here also all about HRT. I am scared too, and I think you are normal for being scared, it's a big deal. I think I have already become pretty depressed dealing with the pain I have for so long now. I don't think I need medication though, I just hope that once I have the surgery I will feel better. This is a great place for information and support.
alicia

my surgery is this coming thursday I went to my preop yesterday and she made me get the flu and the h1n1 shot. this was fine with me I don't need to catch anything else.

Thanks for you support. I am having the surgery b/c of fribroids, they are pretty big. After the pain of this last menstrual cycle I know I'm making the right decision. I have been doing research about HRT and I have info about natural hormone replacement but I am still not sure.
I think it is just a difficult day today, is all. I have to get busy and stop dwelling on something that is not here yet. I know that I have to just keep educating myself and keep busy.

I am getting both too. It's the logical and responsible thing to do but when you have the fear that I have of needles, it's almost as difficult as having the surgery. Believe me. Now that I think of if I think it's probably the shots that I have to get this week and not the surgery that I'm freaking out over.

Facin, I had been dealing with fibroids and heavy bleeding for a long time, and I knew this was the best thing. Did a lot of research. I'm a very practical, just the facts kind of person. My mom also had a hyster about the same age as I am now (wow, when did I get to be my mom's age???) But as the surgery date got closer, I too started getting scared. I just reminded myself of the reason I was doing this, and that I had looked into all of the alternatives, including not doing it at all. Then I reminded myself that the needles (I also freak out with needles) and pain I would have to deal with would only be temporary.

If you can keep at least one of your ovaries and avoid HRT that's great. If not, please remember the reason you are taking this step for your overall health, and that the side effects of the surgery are temporary. Work closely with your doc to find the best dosage of HRT if that's what you need, and don't hesitate to ask for a change if you feel it's needed.

You've managed to get through a lot already, given that you have at least one DD (from your original post). If you can raise a child, you can handle this!

Facinreality1-
Hang in there! For most of us, the worrying and waiting before surgery was worse than anything during or after the surgery.

As far as HRT or no HRT, educate yourself but remember you can't really make any decisions until you see what actually happens during your surgery (eg you and your dr could decide to keep one ovary, but once he/she is in there, realizes both need to be removed). And you can't predict how you will be after your surgery. Not everyone has problems afterwards that require HRT.

Remember there are tons of options to handle any symptoms of menopause, including non-hormonal options (there's a separate board for HRT-no hormones on this website, too).

So don't go looking for trouble, wait and see what your body needs. And in the meantime, keep reading and posting here and take extra good care of yourself - it's an enormously stressful time for you right now. You have a huge community of support here.

Take care!

try and think of the good things after this surgery don't dwell on the what ifs and let your nerves go crazy. think of this when you start getting scared. no more PAIN, no more Periods, no more PMSing. I don't know if your tired all the time like I am from my fibroids. but you'll have more energy too. you'll be able to wear white, new panties with no stains. waiting is the hardest part but it is better on the other side HUGS

Thanks so much for all of your advice. I went for a couple of walks and then my husband and I went to the park, then the mall and then dinner. I feel a little better now esp after reading all of your posts.
I know that if I can just stay positive I will be ok. I think I need to get to Curves and then on the treadmill. Gotta boost those endorphines.
Happy New Year.

First off I think you need a big all of us here understand all of your anxieties. I had my TAH/LSO (Right ovary was removed when I was 16) on Dec. 2nd. I am so very glad to have it all behind me, both the anxiety and the pain. I am 44 years old and have the same worries over HRT. I checked out this site....godsend! and at my two week check talked with my Dr. and told her of my worries. Both of my parents passed away from blood clots two years ago. I just don't want to even have one worry of taking HRT and "possibly" having a blood clot from taking them. My Dr. was very supportive and said it was completely up to me, since I haven't really shown many symptoms of menopause since my operation. So, for now, I have opted not to do any HRT. I take my calcium, and if I do end up needing something my Dr. is also supportive of trying out something natural first. My advice to you is talk with your Dr. and tell him/her your fears. With the depression, I was more depressed before operation, with the amount of blood loss I would have and how much it was affecting all aspects of my life. I am pretty much dancing around now that I don't have that anymore .

Know that you have many sister's here for you I hope this helps with some of your anxiety.

Kris