TVH: Any last minute words of advice about surgery tomorrow?

My house is spotless and my bag is nearly packed. I have tried to keep myself busy all day, but anxiety is starting to set in now. Any last minute words of wisdom? Husband can't be with me until I'm in my room after the surgery. I have 6 children-two in college, an autistic son, and my youngest is 10. I don't think all of them understand mom won't be back to normal in a few days like after my elbow surgery last year. I'm afraid I will struggle with guilt on top of the hormones and everything else. I don't handle anesthesia or pain pills well. They make me sick but my dr has a plan in place. Any advice on coping at home afterwards?

Feeling anxious is very normal. I'm glad your Dr. has a plan in place for your anesthesia/pain pill nausea. My Dr. gave me a patch that went behind my ear before surgery that made it so I had no nausea whatsoever. Pain pills are the best when you need them. I found that taking 2 stool softeners daily I had no problems with constipation. If those cause you nausea there are also things you can take on top of the pain pills to ease the nausea at home. Yes, this recovery takes time. That is one thing that our families have a hard time understanding. I had my surgery on November 13 two years ago. Along with my LAVH, I had many repairs done for prolapse, so my vagina was not happy sitting upright for a long while! My surgery was right before Thanksgiving! My husband did all of the cooking while I laid on the couch. I felt horribly guilty. Then right after that I wanted to get started on Christmas. You know, the shopping and baking. My first trip out I went out to Walmart with my husband at 2 weeks post-op. He did all of the pushing of the basket. I just stumbled along and looked. Well, it felt so good to get out that I stumbled along for 4 hours. LOL. That was a mistake! I was extremely sore and fatigued after that day. I knew I was overdoing it at one hour in but I kept going. My best advice to you is be prepared that you will feel some guilt. BUT LET IT GO. Looking back on my surgery instead of wanting and wishing and feeling guilty, I wish I had just rested both mind and body. I got into a funk. I didn't do the things I should have done. I just moped a lot and felt sad that I couldn't get out and do things. But it can actually be a great time to do those things you put off. Like organize photos or watch an entire TV series. Do Christmas shopping online. Find something to make for your tree. Read a holiday book. I think having it done right before the holidays can actually be kind of nice because there's movies to watch and card games to play. You can make it special with your family as you rest and spend quality time with them by doing simple things. Just trying to show you a different perspective. Here's to a great recovery!

Hi $0Tired0110 -

The night before surgery can be stressful indeed. Distract yourself as best you can with favorite DVDs and books, talks with family.

You will have to explain to your family that recovery will take time - weeks and not days. Tell them you will need help with cooking, cleaning, dishes, laundry, shopping, driving, etc. You will not be bedridden, but you will need to rest much. You will be able to do minor items around the house, but much will be left undone - like house cleaning. You will have lifting restrictions - 10 lbs for 6 weeks and 20 lbs for 8 weeks is common. No driving for 2 weeks is also common. You will be taking walks, as these help you heal.

You may be able to enlist your children to help around the house, with DH leading or supervising. Maybe helping make meals, cleaning up, etc. They can become helpers for you for all types of things. But, you will have to learn to let much go - your house will get very dirty - that is okay. Your primary goal is to heal. Here are articles that may help:
5 Things Your Family Needs to Know About Hysterectomy
Family | Helping Your Husband Understand Hysterectomy

It is okay to focus on yourself during this period of recovery. Always remember that recovery is not a contest, nor is it a race. It is more marathon than sprint. You only get one chance to heal right.

Good luck tomorrow. We will be waiting for you on the other side.