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Hysterectomy scheduled 8/5 can't stop worrying Hysterectomy scheduled 8/5 can't stop worrying

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  #1  
Unread 07-29-2020, 01:18 AM
Hysterectomy scheduled 8/5 can't stop worrying

I'm up at 2 am worrying about a whole host of things. I live alone and have no one who can stay with me or really visit at all. I feel less alone, though, since securing the rides I need to and from the hospital and having a friend volunteer to bring me groceries if I need that.

What woke me up and made it impossible to go back to sleep was worry that the Walmart grocery delivery person would not be able to find my apartment. (I live in an odd mixed use building.)

Then I started feeling scared that I will go under anesthesia and never wake up. Thinking, what is death like and what if this is my time to go? Contemplating human mortality in general.

Then my pesky brain went back to a conversation I overheard at a hair salon years ago. Two women next to me were discussing surgery and one described how awful it was for her because she was paralyzed by the anesthesia, but still awake enough to feel everything and unable to tell anyone. That was a week before I had my gall bladder removed, and it worried me a lot back then too. But I keep telling myself that is an extremely rare thing to happen, if indeed it DID happen. Sometimes people do fib.

So now that I'm up, I can't stop worrying about all the tasks I have set myself to complete before 8/5. House cleaning, shopping, getting meds and other such things.

When I was offered a selection of dates for my surgery yesterday, I chose the first available because if given more time, I would just find new things to worry about and do. Just get the darn thing over with.

Things I'm trying to remind myself of:

One, the surgeon is the best surgeon in this field in this region, There is no better person to do the job.

Two, I am less alone than I felt previously. I asked a friend to call me every day to check on me and will give her the security code to enter my building. That way, if she gets no response from me, she can come over. I am glad I chose her because she is a very stable, reliable, cool headed person able to handle emergencies very well.

Three, I've handled pain before and did ok. I didn't need all the pain pills I was given and generally bounced back quickly, for the two other surgeries I've had. (Appendix and gall bladder.)

Four, last month I was under anesthesia for a D&C, polyp removal and hysterescopy. And last month I had similar fears about not waking up from the anesthesia and that turned out OK. Chances are, it will be fine this time as well.

Other reassuring facts or perspectives would be welcome from others, as well as advice on coping with this constant worrying. I am quite beside myself with worry.

Thank you for reading this huge long rambling post
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  #2  
Unread 07-29-2020, 04:20 AM
Re: Scheduled 8/5 can't stop worrying

and welcome to Hystersisters!
Don't pay too much attention to that conversation in the hair salon, because incidents of waking up while under anaesthesia are extremely rare. I was also concerned about that possibility, as well as worrying that I'd never wake up. I discussed these concerns with my anesthesiologist, and he did everything he could to make sure I'd get through it okay. Anaesthesia techniques have advanced over the past several years, and you will be monitored closely to make sure everything is okay. As for recovering alone, here are a few suggestions for items to have on hand: a good pair of walking shoes; loose fitting clothes; a few small pillows to protect your belly when coughing and sneezing; a Squatty Potty or small footstool to elevate your feet while you're on the throne, which can help to make those post-op bowel movements easier by properly aligning the rectum so the poop can pass through more smoothly; disposable plates and cutlery to minimize clean-up work; extension cords for plugging in your electronics; a grabber for picking up small objects off the floor. When your friend offers to buy your groceries, you can ask for the following items to combat post-op constipation and gas: peppermint tea; fibre-rich whole grain cereal like oatmeal or All Bran; frozen blueberries; magnesium-rich dark chocolate, leafy greens, and pumpkin seeds; fresh lemons - squeeze the juice of half a lemon into a glass of warm water; cardamom, coriander, or fennel seeds, Gas-X; a fibre supplement like Metamucil or Benefibre. Wishing you all the best for a successful surgery and a smooth recovery!
  #3  
Unread 07-29-2020, 12:03 PM
Re: Scheduled 8/5 can't stop worrying

Your concerns are very normal. I did the very same thing. I do think you seem very prepared. You said you have a wonderful Dr. Your friend is reliable and will be checking on you. So that part is taken care of. I was worrying constantly before my hysterectomy. I'm an analytical thinker and wonder and do all the "What Ifs?" I would catch myself over thinking and I just had to tell myself I cannot worry and THEN I had to get up and get busy doing something. It was there in the back of my head but I didn't allow myself to sit idle. And it all worked out well. Keep posting on here. It's not rambling. It helps to tell other women that are in the same situation.
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  #4  
Unread 07-29-2020, 01:02 PM
Re: Scheduled 8/5 can't stop worrying

Hi Tiger Eye,

I didn't know peppermint tea was helpful. I have most of the items you suggested on the way or on my shopping list, so I'm pretty well equipped. That's another thing I need to tell myself, that I am very organized and will probably think of most things ahead of time, and whatever I neglected to get, I can have delivered or someone can drop them off. So worrying about not being prepared is an unrealistic fear. That will be just fine too. Thank you so much for the reassurance and advice.

Hey Polka Dot Mocha,

I too overthink things. Keeping busy is a good idea, rather than sitting there thinking and worrying. I certainly have plenty to do, lol. Thank you for your encouragement and sharing your own experiences. All you folks on here are so helpful!
  #5  
Unread 07-29-2020, 01:07 PM
Hysterectomy scheduled 8/5 can't stop worrying

  Quote:
Originally Posted by Poppy471 View Post
I'm up at 2 am worrying about a whole host of things. I live alone and have no one who can stay with me or really visit at all. I feel less alone, though, since securing the rides I need to and from the hospital and having a friend volunteer to bring me groceries if I need that.

What woke me up and made it impossible to go back to sleep was worry that the Walmart grocery delivery person would not be able to find my apartment. (I live in an odd mixed use building.)

Then I started feeling scared that I will go under anesthesia and never wake up. Thinking, what is death like and what if this is my time to go? Contemplating human mortality in general.

Then my pesky brain went back to a conversation I overheard at a hair salon years ago. Two women next to me were discussing surgery and one described how awful it was for her because she was paralyzed by the anesthesia, but still awake enough to feel everything and unable to tell anyone. That was a week before I had my gall bladder removed, and it worried me a lot back then too. But I keep telling myself that is an extremely rare thing to happen, if indeed it DID happen. Sometimes people do fib.

So now that I'm up, I can't stop worrying about all the tasks I have set myself to complete before 8/5. House cleaning, shopping, getting meds and other such things.

When I was offered a selection of dates for my surgery yesterday, I chose the first available because if given more time, I would just find new things to worry about and do. Just get the darn thing over with.

Things I'm trying to remind myself of:

One, the surgeon is the best surgeon in this field in this region, There is no better person to do the job.

Two, I am less alone than I felt previously. I asked a friend to call me every day to check on me and will give her the security code to enter my building. That way, if she gets no response from me, she can come over. I am glad I chose her because she is a very stable, reliable, cool headed person able to handle emergencies very well.

Three, I've handled pain before and did ok. I didn't need all the pain pills I was given and generally bounced back quickly, for the two other surgeries I've had. (Appendix and gall bladder.)

Four, last month I was under anesthesia for a D&C, polyp removal and hysterescopy. And last month I had similar fears about not waking up from the anesthesia and that turned out OK. Chances are, it will be fine this time as well.

Other reassuring facts or perspectives would be welcome from others, as well as advice on coping with this constant worrying. I am quite beside myself with worry.

Thank you for reading this huge long rambling post
Hello! I just want to say that all of your feelings are completely normal! I had a total of 5 surgeries in 2011, all under general anesthesia, and no matter what, I was worried. As humans, we constantly worry about our well being. Mention your fears to the surgeon and to anesthesia, as they will be able to help ease your fears about the surgery. In the mean time, take time for yourself and do some deep breathing exercises. Even after all my surgeries over the years, which is over 10, I still get worried, but I do know I am in good hands of those who wish to keep me safe. You can and will make it through this!
  #6  
Unread 07-29-2020, 07:47 PM
Re: Scheduled 8/5 can't stop worrying

Hi Poppy471 -

All of your feelings, fears, emotions and anxieties, as well as a freakout , are completely normal. Know that the doctors and nurses will watch over you and monitor you very closely during your surgery. Probably at no other time are you the center of such attention. All of the medical personnel in the OR have additional education and training just to be there. While unusual events such as you heard in the hair salon can occur, know that they are very rare. And you have already had anesthesia before and had no issues.

As the other sisters have said, it helps to keep yourself very busy - it can take your mind off your surgery. It also helps to exercise. Maybe treat yourself to a favorite snack, perhaps or

  #7  
Unread 07-29-2020, 07:53 PM
Re: Scheduled 8/5 can't stop worrying

You are not alone! My surgery is scheduled for 8/3 and I’m worrying away, making lists, and finding things to fret about. I even wrote myself a Will.

I know we will both be just fine but it’s comforting to know I’m in good company worrying the nights away!
  #8  
Unread 07-29-2020, 08:53 PM
Re: Scheduled 8/5 can't stop worrying

  Quote:
Originally Posted by Lissa06 View Post
Hello! I just want to say that all of your feelings are completely normal! I had a total of 5 surgeries in 2011, all under general anesthesia, and no matter what, I was worried. As humans, we constantly worry about our well being. Mention your fears to the surgeon and to anesthesia, as they will be able to help ease your fears about the surgery. In the mean time, take time for yourself and do some deep breathing exercises. Even after all my surgeries over the years, which is over 10, I still get worried, but I do know I am in good hands of those who wish to keep me safe. You can and will make it through this!
I would like to reassure you that what we fear and worry about is usually worse than reality. I had my surgery 9 weeks ago and I have never been so scared in my life. I worried continuously and didnt sleep much. This is normal for any surgery. I created a book of messages and inspiration from friends and I read it daily to remind myself that I am strong and I will get through this. I also did calming meditations and Tapping (EFT if you want to look it up) to keep me as calm as possible. All these things helped a lot. I was even doing it on my way into the theatre. I did panic as the team prepared me but the anesthesiest took over immediately and I was alseep straight away and didn't know anything else till 12 hours later in my room. I have had a very easy recover and not experienced most of the symptoms that I was warned or worried about. Good luck and praying for a complication free surgery and a speedy recovery.
  #9  
Unread 07-29-2020, 10:30 PM
Re: Scheduled 8/5 can't stop worrying

Oh my, I am overwhelmed by the all the support. Thank you, each one, Lissa06, marestail, mpclark and Rainbow Sue.

It's good to know I'm not just being some kind of overreacting worry wart. I am glad that my hospital does not bring the patient into the OR until they are under. And it's also good that they kept me busy just before, with all the different personnel introducing themselves and asking a bazillion questions. They left me alone long enough to start worrying again, then gave me the sedative. It was rather funny, I was awake long enough to say Wow, that worked fast. Then next thing, I was waking up, doing just fine.

The last procedure, they did not put my cpap mask on me until I was conscious again. (A cpap is a device that makes sure your airway stays open as you sleep, it is a treatment for sleep apnea.) Which kinda defeated the purpose of me bringing my cpap machine with me. I mentioned this to the anesthesiologist's nurse today and she made a note that I should have the cpap mask put on me while I am unconscious. I hope that happens.

I'm winding up for several days of nonstop busyness. I have my covid test on Sunday morning, then I am confined to the house, when I can do all my house work. My lists and calendars have me booked solid until Sunday.

Thank you for all the encouragement and reassurance. mpclark, you'll be having yours two days before me. If you tell me the time of your surgery I will send out healing thoughts as they roll you into the OR. Mine is scheduled for 5:30 AM! Good luck to us both!
  #10  
Unread 07-29-2020, 11:27 PM
Re: Scheduled 8/5 can't stop worrying

You are not alone. I am right there with you preparing for 8/3! Depending on the moment, I may be feeling anxious, then elated (woohoo no more fibroids!), then worried I will forget something (have been on a buying spree because of this), then distracting myself with chores, then watching a funny show, etc. I keep telling myself, it will all be over before I know it.
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