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kids husbands and pets. YIKES kids husbands and pets. YIKES

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Unread 12-18-2001, 09:53 AM

Hi everyone

I just thought I would pop in and say hi. I think this is the longest time I have never been on line. Almost scary.

Things are going well. The girls are sooooooooo excited about Christmas but then so am I . Already they are eating to much sugar and sleeping less YIKES It always makes for an interesting time.

I want to wish you all a happy and festive holiday season for however you all celebrate it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Take care

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Unread 12-18-2001, 03:30 PM
kids husbands and pets. YIKES

I know this thread has been going on for a long time, but I just got wind of it. I have a ds 23, dd 22, and another dd 18 plus a dd in-law. I muddled my way through their teenage years but always tried to do the very right them for them. Looking back I know some things I did right and some things I did wrong. Here they are:

1. One of the best things we did for my two oldest teenagers wasn't my idea so I can't take any credit. Some of their friends (they ran in the same circle) parents got the idea to get together as families once a month. There were about 10 - 12 families invloved. We played bunk, camped, bowled, had scavenger hunts, etc. The kids got to see that parents could have time too. The kids bonded a really deep kind of friendship and all of us parents felt comfortable when our kids were with these families because we really got to know each other. Even on the weekends that there was nothing formal planned the kids seem to congregate at one of the homes and the fun just kind of continues. I think this was the best derterrant for them to stay out of trouble. They really enjoyed hanging with the 'rents.

2. I let my kids pursue the hearts desires. It meant that I spent a great deal of time driving them to practice or club meetings, etc. but it paid off in that all three of my kids paid their way through college with their athletics.

3. Kept them and us involved in church. This was another peer group for them to be associated with that held the values I wanted them to have.

4. I let them have pets to love and take care of. I think having a pet teaches kids compassion and respect for life (unlike having a pesky little sister or brother)

Here's what I did wrong:

1. They were so busy they didn't have time to earn money. So I handed it out when they wanted to go to a movie. I wish I would have insisted that they "worked" for me to earn extra money. They did have regular chores but I wish I had taught them to work harder for cash. They learned to work hard for sports, but they still thinks that money comes from me.

2. My son was gifted and our school (private) didn't have a gifted program. I half heartedly tried to get him in the public school program, but didn't get much help. I should have pushed for the help he needed. A gifted child (i have learned) needs special programs as much as other children may need help.

That's just a little that I can come up with right now. Sorry this is so long
Unread 12-20-2001, 05:50 AM

Hi Lisa I am glad that you found us

Wow what great ideas about your kids.

I have two dds and they are very involved in things to. It is nice to see them do well. We live in a small community so our social life tends to be with the neighbours so there are kids everywhere. Which is wonderful. Even New Years eve we celebrate it with our neighbours. It is our turn to host . 8 adults and 9 kids ranging fro 5 to 10. They love it and so do we. We have never gone out on New Years without them!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks for your input

Have a wonderful safe festive Christmas season

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Unread 12-20-2001, 07:08 AM
Thumbs up - kids husbands and pets. YIKES Hi Lisa!


Your ideas (and the others whose you shared in!) were wonderful advice from a seasoned Mommie!

How long did it take to get the teens to all agree on these family get togethers...or the merging family get togethers?! With four teens (18.5 out of home, 16.5, 14, and 14) I can just imagine them all whining about having ot do a regular event with...gasp...the 'rents! Though we do have Thursday nights as family night...and that just means that by are expected to share with the family...whether we go out and do somethign or do something at is a time when we all can check in with one another and catch up! Playing games is one of our most frequent activities...what fun!

I have to disagree with your opinion on the gifted programs...not that it is wrong. Different schools are are the kids. The twins are very gifted. Ashleigh was so pressured to get into the gifted programs that she would totally stress out before the tests...and the pressure caused her to not do well. Her teachers were amazed because they all felt that she was a definite go! This started in grammar school and now that she is almost out of junior high...she is in all advanced and accellerated is her twin brother Nathan...who was NOT pressured at such an early age. (This started in kindergarten!) Nathaniel is gifted in more artistic and literature...and he is utilizing these abilities because he is choosing what he experiments with...not being forced to do THEIR work in THEIR programs. I guess it all depends on the school district...and yours sounds like it was not offering enough to keep your child occupied?

I LOVE that I can come to this wonderful site with ANY topic and find support and opinions and advice...and best of all...HUGS!!!!

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