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Just Get Over It (rant) Just Get Over It (rant)

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Unread 03-21-2007, 06:36 PM
Just Get Over It (rant)

I did not want to thread-jack the below thread with a rant:

"Everyone here understands exactly how I feel and never makes me feel like I need to just get over it."
Was a comment by Sanbox 49 in reply to "First post- TAH scheduled for Mar. 26!" by LSM63 on 3/21/07 3:06pm.

That comment struck me so profoundly.

It is true when people hear hysterectomy because of cancer/endo/whatever, so quickly they try to dismiss it as nothing big- as if your uterus/cervix/ovaries aren't major- "not like it's a lung or something" I have heard. Like it's only that- "just get over it."

I too have found great support here. I'm tired of those who minimize the value of such organs. Yes- the organs are not imperative for life, and I'm actually looking forward to not having a period anymore but it's not the same as having an ingrown toenail cut off!

Kudos to all the women who take a stand against those who try to write it off as nothing more than a bump on the nose!
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Unread 03-21-2007, 08:01 PM
Just Get Over It (rant)

Yeah, comments like, "Well, you're done with it, anyway," really burn my butt! I feel like saying, "Hey, it's a major organ, dimwit. Removing it can affect my bladder function, my bowels, rearrange organs and create problems, etc." Bugger off!

I feel better. Thank you!
Unread 03-21-2007, 08:09 PM
Just Get Over It (rant)

A few days before my scheduled hysterectomy a mom from my grand daughters dance class responded to my news by saying, "Oh Not to worry a friend of mine had one done last year and was up and running the day after surgery!" I was too shocked to respond....DIMWIT....The ugly side of me wanted to say something really nasty in reply...But, the nice considerate side of me just smiled and turned the other way. Let's hope she doesn't ever have to have her female organs taken out.
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Unread 03-21-2007, 08:18 PM
Just Get Over It (rant)

Surgery is a big deal no matter what type it is and if you are having general anesthesia it is a bigger danger. We all have the choice to have the procedure or not. Women can't let the decision be made by their doctor do your homework. Each of us have to deal with it the best way we can and for some of us it may be anger. I see surgery all the time and it is not what most of you think. Take it from me you have to really learn to be strong and don't wear any feeling on your shoulders. It's ok if we don't all share the same thoughts that's what makes us who we are.
Unread 03-21-2007, 08:22 PM
Just Get Over It (rant)

Thank you for speaking what I am sure we all think. When someone tells me it's no big deal and do it and get over worrying, it gets me riled up. Thank goodness for this site and all you wonderful hystersisters who know better!
Unread 03-21-2007, 08:27 PM
Just Get Over It (rant)

"the organs are not imperative for life"-from previous post

I understand what is meant by the above, but I always remind people that these are organs ARE needed "for life" when they say something dumb. Without them they wouldn't have the ability to be so bloody ignorant.

Unread 03-21-2007, 08:56 PM
Just Get Over It (rant)

My favorite insensitive comment is "You're so lucky! You don't have to have a period anymore!" My second favorite is "Well, you've had 2 c-sects and were fine, so this is nothing." Ugh. As my mother-in-law put it, a baby was meant to be removed from your body, your uterus was not, so it is a lot more intense of a surgery. Not to mention that each and every one of us has had some sort of problem that requires removal of organs to fix! But no one mentions that! Geez...
Unread 03-21-2007, 09:14 PM
Just Get Over It (rant)

Hmmm..let us hope that I do not encounter any of these numptys, given my particular state of mind right now.

My mean and nasty side is prevailing, while the kind and compassionate side is lying dormant.

I beleive, my fellow sisters, that if I do in fact have the displeasure of wasting my oxygen on one of these dimwits, that I will speak loud and clear for us all. The classy and ladylike side of me will not allow me to type these few choice words I would have for them.

In fact, I've already encountered a couple....my MOTHER being one of them. Like.....hellooooo??
Unread 03-21-2007, 09:43 PM
Just Get Over It (rant)

Hi everyone, i am new to this site... and a not sharp w/these message boards.. but ... reading these messages... THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU.... i had my hsterectomy in 2003... it has changed me emotionaly, mentaly, physically... and honestly i cant remember the exact date.. so many other bad things happened after being in the hospital for 1 wk.. i was back in w/a blood clot... but thats not what we are talking about here....
well tell that to my heart every mothers day and baby shower and birth announcments ... it hurts so bad... sometimes i just want to lie in bed and never get up
i get so angry with wow... you dont get your period anymore... (ok, they were bad... but its not a prize i won at a raffel)

i dont feel like a woman....
and people are just plain mean & selfish & just dont understand... and now today i enter a search for a support group (my friend has been after me to find a support group) and here i find women who feel like i do...
i so hope this is the beginning of some sort of healing for me.. cuz i cant take another year of this & my body cant stand to gain anymore weight...
thank you
Unread 03-21-2007, 10:08 PM
Just Get Over It (rant)

Ahh, so right you all are!!! I have had ALOT of people say the same things to me....even my MOTHER!! She's been saying that I am having panic attacks for no reason, and that I will be okay, I must be over reacting. A lady who works for her had a hyster and was up and about the day she was out of the hospital. She even pulled out her own cathater! To which I replied..."well, thats fine for her, but there is a reason the DRS want you to take it easy. I don't want to have problems down the road because I did too much too soon." I have had sooo many of my friends say to me, and I am sure they mean well, "Ohh, you're so lucky, no more periods!" Yeah, no more periods, just night sweats, mood swings, and everything else that comes along with menopause. Sure, I am looking forward to no more periods, but I would have much rather my female organs been healthy so as I could live without having to have surgery to remove them. And of course I was told today that even after having a hyster, there was no guarantee that I would be pain free ( severe endo here).
I am so very thankful to have found this wonderful support group here. I know I have many friends and family that are concerned, but I feel like they have NO idea how to relate to this. They have no idea how to respond or to know what I am feeling and going through. They are well meaning I am sure, but some of the things they say still end up not helping much, no matter how hard they try. And my poor DH, well...he is doing the best he possibly can, and trying to be strong for me, he is a god send, my angel, and he tells me to calm down, and when I cry he asks me what's wrong....and well, I feel like screaming, "what in the **** do you think is wrong?" But I don't. I have only done that once, the rest of the times I just have to explain to him why I am STILL crying over this. He just holds me and reminds me of how much better I will feel afterwards. He also knows that by him doing extra housework it calms me down alot because I am not stressing about it. And this week he has been getting the kids up and ready for school for me, so I can sleep in and rest up ( most of the time I dont go to sleep until I pass out around 6am ). And I feel so badly because I know he is sick too right now and I should be taking care of him. I guess we'll just have to take care of each other. "In sickness and in health" right?? LOL
But I know I can come here and I have a large network of ladies who DO know exactly what I am feeling. I love my hyster sisters. I am so glad I found this haven!!!!
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