Does anyone get me?

Janagru,

Hang in there Honey it will get better. I finally had to sit down and tell my DH the straight facts and the fact that if he didn't take care of me well then I may never be able to take care of him again!!! Believe me I got to the point that I thought I was going to have to hit him over the head with a fryingpan! Has he gone to any Dr. Appts with you? Make him go...I told my DH the Dr. said he had to go for the Pre-op visit. Hearing it from the Doc seemed to help change his mind about this.

Hey I'm in the Pittsburgh are also (Greensburg). What area are you in? Feel free to send me a message anytime. I will go tthe castle tomorrow and let you know how things are going. And don't worry about everybody else. Some people just don't get it! I know my Mom doesn't. So I am having her meet me in my room when they bring me up from recovery. I want her to see me looking horrible so she knows that this isn't no piece of cake!!!

Fallflower

Janagru-
So your hubby and mine belong to the same club. Mine is just as callous as yours. My surgery is tomorrow. My DH saw something about an older lady (60ish) having a hyster and was back at work the next day. Yeah, you can imagine the conversation after that. If he tells me "SEE, it's nothing! This is 2006!" one more time, I will just kill and get it over with. Screw the jail sentence, it will be a perfect case of justifiable homicide!

Good luck dear. I think the waiting is the worse, it gives you too much time to think of every possible thing that could go wrong!
Nan

You might try a lafuma recliner (search online--the manufacturer's website, which comes up first, has the best prices). They're designed as outdoor recliners, but plenty of back patients use them for indoors. They are the most comfortable recliners ever invented, and they're only about $100 with shipping. I found them extremely easy to get up out of without straining my abs, much easier than the couch or bed. They recline into a zero-gravity position, and then sit upright as well for eating or working at the computer. Now when I go visiting, I make my husband drag it along (they weigh 16 lbs). We've bought 3 of them, 2 for outside, 1 for inside, and now all our friends and relatives are buying them too.

Good luck!

Have your husband go to one of your Dr appointment with you. If you only have one you might what to call ahead of time and explain to the Dr what is going on with your husband. Then ask him to explain everything that is going on with you and what the recovery will be like when you get to your appointment.

I know how you feel about the MIL. I married the wrong son. She helps everyone else always has and I have no parents to help me but they all do. So I have just gotten use to it. Taken my husband 20 years but he finally sees the whole picture now.

When you get home don't worry you realy do not have to do that much just take care of yourself. If there is nothing quick you can grab to eat call for take out and drink lots of water. Other then that you just have to lay back put your feet up and rest. All the house work and everything else can wait.

When I got home the thing that brothered me the most was the forced isolation. I only have 1 bathroom so HAD to stay in my bedroom.Everyone deserted me. I had a hard time trying to get them to bring me food.I would ask for it when I was hungary and it would show up 2 hrs later after I yelled again for it.

I know it is hard but try and relax the time does going by quickly even though it does not seem so!

hi there...first off..im so sorry your feeling this way,and so sorry your hubby has made light of this surgery,which is a HUGE deal...i dont know your husband,or the whole situation,but i wonder if with him being a nurse,he sees this sort of thing all the time,so hes just use to it...also,men are kinda clueless when it comes to female problems also,and that may be it too..have you sat down and really really had a heart to heart with him?explain to him your fears,and how your terrified your going to be alone through this...so sorry about your in laws..ive had a set like that in the past(thank god its in the past)..my ex mother in law also couldnt stand for anyone else to have attention or anything like that...just ignore them...that will eat away at them farrr more than anything you could possibly say or do.....just simply ignore them..i know easier said than done..but try it a few times,it may work..hang in there..and anytime you need to talk just im me..ill be around...good luck to you...sonie