A question about post op

I just found this site, and I have a few questions. After an appointment with my gyn last week, we decided to go ahead with an abdominal hysterectomy. The date has not been confirmed yet, but it will be within the next 6-8 weeks. Im not worried about the surgery at all, but I am nervous about post op. My husband works away from home 24 days at a time, his company is at a peak right now and they will not let him have time off at all, no matter what the reason, he has used all his vacation time plus more already this year. I have 3 small children at home, and afterwards I will have virtually no help at all, the youngest is possibly going to be staying with my aunt for 2 weeks afterwards. The other two cannot go stay with family as they are in school, and I live in a different town from all my family ( we just moved here as well, so no friends that I know well enough to have them keep my children) Am I crazy for even thinking i might be able to do this? I have had 3 c-sections, while I know what recovery from those are like, how much different will this be? With the sections I was good to go the day I got home.
Any helpful hints, BTDT advice? What kinds of things can I do to make recovery easier, faster?
Thanks

midnightangel,


I had my surgery on August 28. I do not know what I would have done if my husband was not able to be with me for the first two weeks. I also had two c-sections and was up and going quickly after I came home. I thought that this would be the same, but for me it was much more difficult than both of my other surgeries. My incision was vertical while my c-sections were horizontal. I'm not sure how much of a difference this made, but I had a lot more pain. It is so very important that have the time you need to recovery from your surgery. I thought I would be back at work in 3 weeks. Wrong!!! I still have two more weeks before my doctor will even discuss it with me. I tried to do too much thinking that if I pushed myself to do more I would get back in the groove of things faster. I actually made my situation worse.

I am afraid that by you having no one to help you that you won't be able to get the rest you need. My children are 13 and 11, and they were able to help after my husband went back to work.

This website has the absolute best information I have found, you have found the right spot to get a lot of your questions answered. You will even find a lot of information about things your doctor has not even discussed with you. Please do not try to do this alone. The best advice i can give you about recovery is doing exactly like you doctor tells you, do not try and do more. I really hope you will be able to find someone to help. I wish you all the best.

Thank you for sharing your experience, and thanks for the well wishes

Hi Midnightangel,

I had a LAVH 25 days ago. You don't say what specific procedure you are getting and your recovery will vary depending on the procedure you have and the condition you are in to begin with. I'd advise that you talk to your doctor soon about your home situation post-op. I would strongly recommend the youngest staying with relatives if that is possible. You don't say the exact ages of your other two children--how independent are they? Can they make their own breakfasts? Can they dress themselves in the morning and get to the bus? For at least the first two weeks, whatever operation you have, you are going to need a lot of rest. If you read this site, especially the post op threads, you will see that some people do pretty well, but others have a host of problems--big and small--that they deal with along the way. Don't hesitate to call the doctor's office if you have a concern. Not overdoing it right away is most important. You can't be worrying about cleaning your house, bathing children or driving for a while. Is it possible for a relative from the other town to stay with you for at least some period of time. Just some things to think about. I wish you the best.

midnightangel - Do you or your husband have insurance that would cover home help for at least a couple of weeks?

You might also check with your doctor and see what he recommends.

Also, see if there are any volunteer groups in your town, either through a church or otherwise.

You will need that help. I don't know how expensive it is to hire - so check out the other options first.

Josephine Rose,
I'm not sure of the abbreviations, but it will be an abdominal hysterectomy, done along the same incision as my c-sections, im keeping my ovaries and cervix. I did tell the doctor that my husband will be away at work and I will have the kids, she didn't say anything much about it. There wont be another appt with her before the operation, but I could speak more with my fmaily doctor.
My youngest is 3yr olds, and the other two are 5 and 7. They are more than capable of making themselves breakfast in the mornings, getting themselves dressed and ready, I do walk them to school though (its one block away), there is no bus service where I live. I did find out that my aunt basically cleared her calendar for me and the youngest will be staying with her There really isnt anyone that could come stay here afterwards though, my sister is already taking off work for the 5 days I will be in the hospital, so childcare will be fully up to me.

Arly3, thats a good question about the insurance, its been so long since I looked at the book, I wonder if there is anything in there, I will have to check.

I have decided that as much as loathe it, Im going to do once a month cooking to cover me for the 4 weeks after surgery, that will take care of all supper meals, just have to heat them up. The oldest if need be can make sandwiches for her and her brother for lunch, and she knows how to make campbells soup in the microwave, but thats will only be on the weekends, they get hot lunch at school. Im going to look into hiring a cleaning person to come in two or three times a week. Still trying to think of what Im going to do with the puppy ( a rambunctious, hyper, loves to jump on you 50 pound,5 month old lab)

	Quote:
Originally Posted by midnightangel Josephine Rose, I'm not sure of the abbreviations, but it will be an abdominal hysterectomy, done along the same incision as my c-sections, im keeping my ovaries and cervix. I did tell the doctor that my husband will be away at work and I will have the kids, she didn't say anything much about it. There wont be another appt with her before the operation, but I could speak more with my fmaily doctor. My youngest is 3yr olds, and the other two are 5 and 7. They are more than capable of making themselves breakfast in the mornings, getting themselves dressed and ready, I do walk them to school though (its one block away), there is no bus service where I live. I did find out that my aunt basically cleared her calendar for me and the youngest will be staying with her There really isnt anyone that could come stay here afterwards though, my sister is already taking off work for the 5 days I will be in the hospital, so childcare will be fully up to me. Arly3, thats a good question about the insurance, its been so long since I looked at the book, I wonder if there is anything in there, I will have to check. I have decided that as much as loathe it, Im going to do once a month cooking to cover me for the 4 weeks after surgery, that will take care of all supper meals, just have to heat them up. The oldest if need be can make sandwiches for her and her brother for lunch, and she knows how to make campbells soup in the microwave, but thats will only be on the weekends, they get hot lunch at school. Im going to look into hiring a cleaning person to come in two or three times a week. Still trying to think of what Im going to do with the puppy ( a rambunctious, hyper, loves to jump on you 50 pound,5 month old lab)

O.k. Midnightangel, sounds like you are thinking this out well. Planning food is a very good idea. So is talking to the family doctor. You might not end up having a five day stay in the hospital--it could be less, but your sister should still stick around as long as she can, even if you come home from the hospital earlier than anticipated. Re: the dog; you can't be dragging a dog that size around on a leash. Maybe an older neighborhood kid could be hired to walk your dog. I am not sure how you will feel about walking your kids to school right away. You might want to line something up with another parent or older trusted child in the neighborhood who can walk your kids to school until you feel up to it. Based on the ages of your kids, I am guessing you are fairly young, and if you are normally active and in good shape, your recovery may be speedier, but here are some suggestions: line up easy food for the kids to eat; plenty of milk (for two weeks), cereal, yogurt, apples, or staples so you don't have to run to the store for anything for a while. And get yourself some high fiber cereal and fruits and stool softeners in case you are constipated. Younger women seem more surprised by the constipation issues following surgery. This is common, especially when you are taking narcotic pain relievers. Narcotics and driving do not mix. Don't drive until your doctor says it is o.k. Have your bedroom ready to settle into when you get home with things around you that you want. If you have a cell phone if can be helpful to keep it with you in your room for convenience. Get your prescription pain medications filled in advance of the surgery so you don't have to bother stopping at the pharmacy on your way home from the hospital. The doctor doing the surgery can call something in ahead of time for you. It is not unreasonable to call her office and ask for this. This is a common practice. You will also want to have some over the counter pain relievers (ask your doctor what she recommends) on hand so that you can transition to them without having to make a trip outside the house.

If you can afford to hire a cleaning person, that would be great because you are not supposed to be doing much lifting and you won't want to bend over much. Aso, perhaps someone else can walk the children home from school.

Again, I wouldn't hesitate to call your surgeon, even if you don't have another scheduled appt before surgery. Also, if she has ordered a bowell prep before surgery, don't plan on going out the rest of the day--you'll need to be close to the bathroom. Good luck

I am two weeks out from having a TAH. I feel really good but then again I don't have small children. Mine are 17 & 19, the youngest is at home. I am speaking from my personal experience and everyone is different.

I have made a few meals, nothing elaborate but then again 5 and 7 year olds, don't need that. My DH was home the day I got home from the hospital, a friend of mine came the following day, but I seriously didn't feel like I needed the help. DH had made me lunch, which I picked at. The following 7 days someone was with me almost 24/7. I was glad to have the company - I feel like I could have taken care of myself though.

I had my postop appointment yesterday and she is very pleased with my healing and progress. I didn't overdo but I do walk daily and I believe I could have walked my kids to the bus stop and back easily. If you're not on any narcotics you can drive them if you don't feel up to walking them, or maybe have a neighbor help out with that.

Is there any way your aunt can come and stay with you to help out you, and the three kids? It's great she's doing this but personally I think it'd be easier if you had another adult in the house to help out with everyone. Just a suggestion.

Sounds like you have a good plan, the meals ahead of time is great - I would also get a few frozen dinner type things for the kids when you don't feel up to doing it all.

I haven't had a c-section but I have heard the recovery is much longer because of the removal of the uterus.

As far as the puppy goes, train him now to stop jumping, there is lots of info online. We also have a 9 month old lab who is pretty energetic! I haven't had any problems with him, he seems to have the sense that I am hurting. He does try to convince me daily to go out and play frisbee with him though!

You have been given some great advice and suggestions from this thread. I wish you the best!

I had an abdominal hysterectomy and was fortunate enough to have my Grandma stay for a few days with me... but oddly enough, my 5yr old son was the most helpful.

I'm probably going to sound like a slave driver but...

Before surgery I prepared him. I told him he was the man of the house (I'm a single mom) and mommy would need his help doing little chores. He loved the idea of helping his mommy.

I taught him how to do simple chores. While I was laid up, he vacuumed and dusted (his version of dusting wasn't quite what I'd hoped for LOL). My little man separated laundry by color and with my supervision would put in the washer and the dryer... and take out of the dryer; we folded clothing together. He took out the inside trash, and my neighbor took my cans to the curb. He even started making his own meals (simple things like Kid Cuisines... I would help him of course, but he did most of the work).

For meals, pasta is always easy and its easy for kids to help clean up when its only a few dishes.

I may have taken the unconventional approach, but like you, I didn't have many options. Work with what you have

ETA: I had a c-section with my son. I am not trying to be negative, but I have to say based on my own experience having a hysterectomy is much more difficult than a c-section. In my opinion, the similarities end at the incision line. I was very tired and sore... it took me much longer to get off the pain meds than I had anticipated.