Not a good day girls......

The support here is great, and I don't mean to whine, but today is harder than I expected, so what will tomorrow be like (with bowel prep and all!!).....Then Tuesday, just want it to be over. Looking forward to a positive outcome, but right now it is hard.

I am single, my 3 girls live with me (18,12,9) and my son with his dad. They are still in school, so I have downplayed this as much as possible, want them to keep the focus on their education ( finals etc are right around the corner). I have great friends, several of whom offered to go with me at 4:30 in the morning, but I am just not comfortable with that as the hour is so early. I have been fine with this, but now I am feeling kind of lonely...silly huh?

I have spent so much time getting everything ready in my classroom and for the sub., as well as for my kids and the cat and house I guess that this all just started to hit.

Ladies that have a DH, be very greatful you have that help. I am leaning on this board and reading it frequently to diminish my worries, but it would be nice to have someone there with you throughout that level of comfort just doesn't haappen from a friend! . My kids are wonderful, but like I said they have school etc. and I don't want them to think this has me anything but confident (which I am , but......).

Am I being silly ????? A cop out??

Wishing it were a week from now!
KTKA

I am so sorry that you are having a rough day. It is completely natural to be nervous, I think all of us either are or were. The bowel prep is bad, but not that bad - I have done worse things in my life and have done the bowel prep multiple times. Your children are at the age where they should be of help to you. My children are DS30, DD27 and DS16. The 30 lives close to me so he was helpful, my 27 year old is married and live out of state but called me a hundred times a day and my 16 year old is right here with me except for the hours he is in school. My two DS's were awesome trying to help with simple dinners and keeping up the house. My DH only took off from work the Wed, Thurs and Fri I was in the hospital and then the Sat and Sun and he went back to work on Monday. I was fine home alone during the day. Had cans of soup and simple microwave meals, lots of fruit and drinks if needed. I really didn't have much appetite the first week and spent much time resting, sleeping, watching tv and taking short walks inside my house every hour or so. I only showered when someone was home so that if I was in trouble someone was there to help. Friends called and a couple of close friends came to visit and of course I was on the computer after a few days posting and reading and sharing with all my sisters. I think you will do fine - keep a good positive attitude- that's 99% of the battle. Remember we are all here for you. This is not half as bad as you imagine. Good luck I will keep you in my prayers as I do all my hyster sisters. Lynn

KT, first let me start off by saying in our household WE OUR TEACHERS! You are among the most underpaid but important jobs in the world and as a classroom volunteer, you have my respect and awe.

I can say from experience that the grass is not always greener . . . (from a former single mom.) I would prefer to have one of my girlfriends accompany me as my DH is just not that great of a support in matters like this. He's also not much of a help around the house and I am not anticipating any pampering at all.

You are fortunate that your girls are of an age where they can be of some assistance and get some good experience with being a care-giver while you are healing. This is a good life lesson for them and I'm sure you'll be a great example of strength and fortitude to them during this process.

There is a good book called "The Red Tent" (a work of fiction) that shows women caring for women at its best. This website is sort of a "Red Tent" for me through my journey. Please feel that we are your "Red Tent" to help you through this and be there for you when you feel alone.

I wish I could give you a big of support. My heart goes out to you. Best wishes for a successful surgery and uneventful recovery.

You are not alone KTKA. I am doing my prep today and in actual fact, aside from all my whining, it really isn't that bad. Hang in there!!
Your kids are old enough to help out, as well as be there for you emotionally. As a mom myself, I realize we try to be the 'rock', not wanting to show any weakness. That has always been the way for me, but not now, not for this.

Allow yourself to be taken care of, I am sure your kids will love the chance to look after their mom.
Remember that you are the princess now, allow your friends, family, and children to 'take the reigns' for now.
Take care and best wishes on your surgery. See you on the other side!!

KTKA - first a hug and a promise to say a prayer for you. When I read your posting, I thought what a great opportunity for you to set an example to your daughters. Having also been a single mom for many years, I know how difficult it can be to accept help. We have to do so much by ourselves that it just becomes a way of life. There is a real strength in allowing yourself to let others help you. Let your daughters take care of you for a little while. I know you are concerned about their school work, and that does need to be a priority. But helping mom needs to be up there near the top of the list as well. Let yourself be the princess for a few days - you deserve it, dear sister!!

Speaking of the DH was not to be derrogatory, but I just meant it is another difficulty to find someone to pick my van up (I am driving myself there), then to bring me home. That is a given with a spouse (I think anyway).

Sorry to those of you with Dh who is not so helpful. My X was one of those! I can relate.
I love the support here and would NEVER want to hurt any princesses feelings!!!!!!

Hurt my feelings? Are you kidding? I'm jealous!

My DH can sometimes be a NSDH but I'm sure I have my days of being a NSDW as well.

Have you considered taking a taxi to the hosp. to avoid the parking issues, etc.? It's easier to order a cab for an early a.m. ride (i.e. like the airport schlep) and then just have a friend fetch you when it's time to go home. Most hospitals charge for the parking as well.

Seems like you've thought of most everything. Were you ever a Scout? You certainly are prepared!

I live kind of far and rural for a cab, good thought though...you must be the scout in the crowd!

I've found that most family members are willing to help out but some just don't know what to do. So if you ask or kindly direct them - it's all in the delivery - they will gladly take care of you just like you have done for them. Let them pamper you, you deserve it!
Relax, take it as it comes - everything will turn out great and you will have everything you need.
Thinking of you.

Sorry to hear you are having a bad day, thoroughly understandable! With your oldest being 18, this would be a good time to let her drive you to the hospital, and maybe even wait if she wants to. Why not ask her how she feels about it? She might really be relieved that you asked her! Sometimes they worry and just don't let it show. Just like us. Good luck with the surgery, it will all be over so quickly and you'll be home and happy! We'll be praying for you!
I've done the bowel prep. too, it's not bad.