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  #1  
Unread 02-05-2005, 08:49 AM
joy

I would like to express my joy that the past years of pain, fear and being anemic are over. I am four weeks past surgery now, and thought about how wonderful 1: to not have to worry about staying home or near a toilet, 2: our bodies can be in the healing process 3: to remember that this is but a small blurp in the journey of life. I will not spend my days whining about small aches and pains. I will not spend my days crying about "why me". I will not spend my time bragging about the size of my fibroids, the level of my hemoglobin, the amount of endo, or the number or surgeries that I have had. I will spend every day thanking God that I did not have cancer issues, and I will pray for the women that do.

I had many friends with hysterectomies that scared me before this surgery because they said "I was in bed for 2 weeks". I had no choice but to be back at work in 2 weeks. I was freaked out by posts at this board that said "I'm three weeks today and finally walked to the mailbox. It was exhausting" and I knew that three weeks after surgery I had many more responsibilities than to get the mail. I would love to have a post op praise board started for women who can encourage the pre-op people.
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  #2  
Unread 02-05-2005, 09:19 AM
amen

I agree. I have posted various times and have joined in the "Boy that exhausted me" chorus. But deep down inside I know that if I had small children at home, if I had to be back at work, or if I lived alone... I would be okay. In fact, I'd be much better off than my bad days before the surgery.

I continue to go slowly, accept my DH pampering, and take my full leave from work because I do not want to chance adhesions or slow my full recovery in any way. I intend to live a full happy life soon.

In the beginning, I posted a signature that contained the issues that led to my surgery. After a week of that, I decided to celebrate the healing not the size of my uterus or number of fibroids or low blood count. I took all of that info off. (Although I do not mean to sound judgmental of those who have that information posted because I do not judge things like that. This is just a personal perspective.) This morning I added the "I FEEL GOOD" line and then I read your post.

Anyway, I'll continue to balance the "princess" life withough guilt (because I can) with moving forward with purpose and increased activity every day (because it is good to push myself a little). I have a recovery strategy and I am working it!

Although I have much empathy for those dealing with more difficult situations than my own, it is nice to post a celebration message sometimes. Thanks for getting it started.
  #3  
Unread 02-05-2005, 09:35 AM
joy

I'm with you, ladies! I thank God every day for healing, dear family and friends who helped me through the tough days, good health insurance and lots more. And I have nothing but compassion for people who have not been as lucky and blessed as I have been. When this healing journey is behind me, one of the things I want to put my new energy into is helping others get through some of life's difficulties. We all know the many kindnesses we have received, both large and small, and how we can share those kinds of things with others to make their load a little lighter, even just for a moment.

What an awesome thread...thanks for sharing the JOY!

sss to all the sisters,

Amoreena

P.S. I'm leaving my sign-off as is for now, just to let the ladies in waiting know there is a good life on the other side of all the nasty stuff!
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  #4  
Unread 02-05-2005, 11:35 AM
joy

amen sisters! I have to say that at two weeks post, I am feeling better than ever, at first I thought it was the drugs! (hehe) but I am off meds and doing really well. I can't believe it since I didn't realize how much my fibroids were effecting me. my symptoms only really started to get bad the last two months. so yes, I'm grateful. Grateful that I didn't live with horrible symptoms and large fibroids for years, and grateful that I am not really in pain now and feeling better. I do have empathy for those whose struggles are tougher, and I hope it doesn't make me seem selfish that I feel so good. Sure , I miss the things I normally do, Tennis, my favorite thing, but when I am well enough to go back on the court, I will not miss wondering when i might have to run to the bathroom, or if i might embarass myself. heck, I may even buy myself a white tennis skirt!

I'm also on board with Amoreena, I really cant wait to feel better to give something back. I am blessed to be in a position to volunteer, and I am ready to get back to helping with my favorite causes, as soon as I can.
thanks for the positive thread, and thanks for a group of positive sisters for support
Sandy
  #5  
Unread 02-05-2005, 12:48 PM
joy

  Quote:
I will spend every day thanking God that I did not have cancer issues, and I will pray for the women that do.
Amen, sister:
hope
  #6  
Unread 02-06-2005, 03:25 PM
joy

I would not like anyone to feel at all guilty for discussing pre-op and post-op symptoms with fellow sisters. The fellowship of common experience is a wonderful support offered by this web site.
  #7  
Unread 02-06-2005, 05:58 PM
joy

I dont think the point of my original post was clear to you. I think this is a fine site to say "I'm having this symptom, it that normal" until you have a chance to call the dr in the morning. What bothered me pre-op was the amount of horrible aches and pains and fatigue that I read abouat on the post op area. It totally freaked me out (and I had had three c-sections that I recovered form nicely) to the point of wanting to cancel this surgery. I could not be in the severe discomfort or fatigue that I was reading about a 6 weeks. Many people strongly recommended that I not read at this site.
The other thing that I began noticing is that people seem to brag about the enormous size of their uterus or how many fibroids they had, or the excessive bleeding and clotting that was going on before surgery. Lets face it, we have all had that (or worse) or the doctor wouldn't be doing this invasive of a procedure.
My point is, post op should also be a place to express the joys of the post surgery time, the relief from pain, the end of worry, the wonderful healing that is going on.
I agree that some have had a worse time than others. The women who aren't healing at the incision, the cancer concerns, etc. But I think this can be a freaky site to read sometimes when you are nervous about what will happen anyway. I think the pre-op women should be encouraged by what they read. Maybe there should be a "I'm feeling fine or wonderful" post op forum or a "new symptom" post op forum so we can read what helps us.
  #8  
Unread 02-06-2005, 06:49 PM
joy

Yeah, I now have mixed feeling about wishing I had known of this site long enough before my TAH to read up on it. I had an emergercy surgery. Even tho I've been in alot of pain for a number of years, I was hoping I could wait it out and somehow get better. Never happened, then it turned life threatening. I've never had an operation before. Never talked to anyone about it either. Wasn't interested. Well there were all kinds of surprises in store for me. Ones I did not enjoy. I've been soooo thankful for this site. It's been invaluable in lot's of ways. However, if I had read these threads before hand I may have been very scared. I have been so lucky. I know this from reading these threads. I believe it's because I went into this thing exceptionally healthy (except for my uterus!). And of course my Doctor deserves some credit! From the first couple hours out of surgery I didn't need help getting up to go to the bath room. It hurt, yes. But so much less than I had been hurting for a awhile. (I had gone to a GP doctor and was told I had huge fibroids. They are painful but not life threatening. They missed the fact that I also had endometritis and a chornic and acute infection in a tube. It was blooned out full of brown fluid. Ugly!) I never had trouble getting outta bed or off a chair. The first week I let myself be pampered by the DH. Though we did go on shopping sprees...visiting family member's. I had a blast the first week. I walked up and down stairs slowly. And untill I learned I would need prunes, I had a bad day!!! I did need a pillow on my lap while sitting down so when a dog jumped on me it wouldn't hurt. The eighth day on I resumed most of the activities. Encluding cleaning foors, laundry, cooking, driving and shopping by myself. I just feel sooo good. My Doctor didn't tell me one thing about what would happen after I got out of the operation. Nothing, so we were doing everything (which we hadn't been able due to pain for some time.) before I was two weeks post op. Never got a drop of blood or discharge, no smell...nothing. Then after reading alot of threads I decided to slow down, thought I might be hurting my chances at a good recovery. I lost energy, got depressed. A few day of that and some very good advice from one of our Canadian sister's (thanks Serinnity!) and I went back to what I'd been doing before. Been great ever since. I went to my eighth week check up yesterday. My Doctor said everything looks healed and great. Ease back into all activities. I laughted inside. If only she knew. But hey!!! she never told me about any limitation! I only met her three days before my surgery. She is my first GYN. And my last. She did an awesome job. So ladies, going into this, it may be really bad, or not. It varies greatly from sister to sister. So many things add it up to how it will be for you. I'm so happy I've been way blessed on this one. But, probably, for most of us, it is still well worth getting the bad parts out. My Doctor asked me how I feel. I told her, "better than I've felt in so long, and that I did not miss that old uterus.". She said the way it looked she amagined that I wouldn't miss it! But, it might be nice to know going in what you might be facing. Just as long as you know it's a might.

I really enjoyed reading about the particulars of sister's fibroids and such. Comparing them to my own. Which were bad. And feeling compassion for those that were worse.

And as we get down this road of recovery. Our emotional needs change a little, our need of a different type of information. How we're looking at things. It's a whole new ball game.

Now that I've talked my way through all of this, more or less. I do wish I had known ahead of time. I had a hard time in the recovery room that I was not prepared for. Didn't know why I'd be asked if I'd passed gas. Didn't know a heating pad would be handy. Didn't get a chance to prepare anything. Didn't get to buy my Hystersister guild before I needed it. Didn't know about prunes (could of saved alot of pain.). I thought something was very wrong with me cause it hurt soooo bad to go potty that first week or so. Didn't know to hold off on making love. (It worked out for me but it could of gone the other way.) So many things would of been nice to know a head of time. And not having to go through it alone, knowing all you hystersisters were there made a huge difference. Thanks Everyone!
  #9  
Unread 02-06-2005, 08:57 PM
Re: joy

  Quote:
Originally posted by bangotti40

My point is, post op should also be a place to express the joys of the post surgery time, the relief from pain, the end of worry, the wonderful healing that is going on.
And, we certainly welcome those types of contributions from post-op members! They would be wonderful additions to the site.

But since Hyster Sisters is a support website, the women who are fortunate enough to have a speedy and unremarkable recovery tend to "ride off happily into the sunset." We would love it if they would stick around, share thoughts, keep us updated about their recovery, and lend their new-found knowledge to Ladies-in-Waiting. Some do, of course, but the vast majority are so busy with their new, healthy lives that that they spend their time elsewhere...and we are happy for their renewed emergence into their own world!

All input is welcome and appreciated...good and bad, dramatic and plain old "run of the mill." It can help someone out there!

Love and s to all,
  #10  
Unread 02-06-2005, 09:07 PM
joy

I think it is fantastic that so many post-op sisters are doing well in their recoveries!

I think if you spend some time reading the boards here at HS, you'll find lots of differences among the pre-op sisters. Many of them are pretty apprehensive and often downright frightened at what might happen in the castle and beyond. Others absolutely cannot wait to get their surgery behind them and begin their "new life" post-op. Still others are frantically looking for a way, any way, to avoid surgery. And that's just a start!

When you see the replies to those ladies, you often hear post-op women saying, "Oh, you'll be fine -- the waiting is the hardest part." Well, sometimes that's true, and sometimes, unfortunately, it isn't true. The fact is that, while many sisters do just fine in the castle and in recovery with few or no complications, others suffer with infections, hematomas, adhesions, and bladder complaints. Still others suffer lifelong consequences which are both serious and frightening. Often those sisters require more surgery and endure much more pain than if they had never had surgery in the first place. And others find out, too late, that they really could have avoided having surgery.

I hate to sound like a huge "downer" here, but the reason you often hear more from the sisters having difficulties after surgery is that they are the ones who tend to need more support.

Let me give myself as an example: I didn't post the first time I slept through the night without needing pain meds; but I did post while I was having trouble sleeping through the night without them. I wanted help and when I was having difficulty, but when I felt better, I didn't feel the need to post every time something went well.

Sisters who are having uncomplicated recoveries are vital to this website! We need you to continue to post about how well you're doing and the successes you are having.

It's so important to remember that this community of women (now more than 60,000 strong, I might add) is made up of over 60,000 different hysterectomy journeys -- some positive, some negative, and some that will never even end in surgery. And there's room for everyone!

I'm so glad everyone is here! I know I couldn't have made it without your support.
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