No Date: 26 Year Old Virgin, Adenomyosis, and No Pain Management

Hi Ladies,

I am a 26 year old virgin with suspected adenomyosis and a whole host of other medical conditions. My surgery is not scheduled because where I live (Manitoba, Canada) it is mandatory to have 2 GYNS sign off on a TAH when the patient is under 30. I have had 6 surgeries in the past (none related to this), two of them abdominal, so the surgery itself does not scare me. This is not my first rodeo.

What does scare me is pain management. Due to an enlarged liver I am forbidden to take pain meds of any kind. I have suffered with constant pelvic pain that became excruciating with my periods since I was 10. I became anemic at 11 and have struggled with that ever since (I got bi-weekly iron shots). I also suffer from hemiplagic migraines (a severe form of migraine) which is why doctors had been leery of putting my on birth control. I don't take anything for the pain or for the migraines.

Two years ago, the pain and bleeding got bad enough that my GP put me on Seasonale (91 day cycle contraceptive). After a year my migraines became steadily worse until I was declared a permanently disabled over-aged dependent of my parents (I live with them). But it worked for the bleeding and pain so I stuck with it (I even stopped needing the iron shots!). However, 3 months ago the Seasonale became less effective. I had spotting (which means excruciating pelvic pain) throughout my cycle and my period came early and lasted 9 days.

So I was referred to a GYN and he recommended Depo. That turned out to be an epic failure. Six weeks in I am still bleeding (not just spotting) and my migraines have become a daily thing which is affecting my motor and speech skills due to the nature of these migraines. My GYN is not even going to try a Mirena IUD due to the fact that he thinks it won't help with the bleeding (I agree) and has suggested a TAH.

I am completely on board. I just want the pain to stop and surgery has always solved my problems in the past (tonsillectomy, appendectomy, cholysystectomy, etc.). I have Aspergers and have never wanted to get married and have kids so parting with my uterus is not a big deal to me. My big concern is pain management. I am one tough cookie but these last three months have worn me down. I basically live on the couch because standing and walking dials up the pain immediately. At night I have to lie in bed with a hot water bottle until I just drift off to sleep. But I am tired and my control over this pain is eroding. I have an incredibly high pain threshold. I have broken bones (sternum) and not felt it until weeks afterwards. But this pain is unlike anything I have ever felt and I don't feel equipped to deal with it. Remember, I can't take painkillers.

My concern about surgery is this: I am allowed no more than 2 doses of morphine post-op, so how will I deal with post-op pain? Is there anyone out there with similar issues with painkillers? If so, please help.

I will have lots of help and support. My mom is going to take a week off work to help me and my dad works from home. Another question: should my mom take time off work starting after I come home from the hospital or the day of my surgery? She works evening shifts so she can spend the morning with me. Any advice would be welcome, thank you!

I am so sorry you are dealing with this. Life in constant pain is not fun.

I wish I could answer your questions on what to do with pain without pain killers. My only suggestion is to talk to your doctor about what they would recommend. There are many women on this site - maybe someone with similar experiences will respond.

Regarding help at home after surgery. I would recommend you have your mom help out starting when you get home from the hospital. You will be very fatigued and sore after your surgery. Getting out of bed and taking a shower will be an accomplishment. So, you are going to need help with meals, dishes, shopping, etc. You may need help for several weeks.

Good luck to you.

(((Hugs)))

I will take your suggestion of having my mom help me out at home when I come back from the hospital. You're right, this will be the biggest surgery I've had and I will need help for longer than I am used to. Thank you for pointing that out to me.

Having a hysterectomy is MAJOR SURGERY. From what I understand, the only thing more major is open heart surgery. I don't want to scare you, but want to let you know that your body will need a lot of time to recover from this. I know you don't know what type of hysterectomy you will be having, but regardless of the type it will still take time for all the internal healing.

I had a total abdominal hysterectomy (TAH) with both ovaries and tubes removed (BSO). I came home from the hospital on a Friday (my surgery was on a Tuesday) and so my husband was with me for the full weekend. He then went back to work on Monday, but was home in the evenings. He did all the cooking, dishes, shopping, etc. for about two to three solid weeks. I packed the fridge with frozen lunches so I could just pop then in the microwave. Breakfasts were just oatmeal.

I guess the bottom line is to keep it as simple as possible for when you are alone. Cleaning your house won't happen for a couple of months - it is not important. Healing right is.

There is a lot of information on this site. You might want to read through the pre-op information. It might answer some of your questions - even ones you did not know you had. We are here to support you as well, so just post your questions, fears and emotions.

(((Hugs)))

I guess I should point out that even without my uterus issues I am still a pretty sick lady. I am permanently disabled. My mom and dad take care of me. I don't cook or clean as it is. I mostly watch TV or read and do some yoga. I go out of the house maybe once a week if at that. So resting and not overdoing will not be a problem for me. This is something I do everyday in order to keep myself as healthy as I can be. Even after this surgery I will not be healthy but I will be in better shape than now. So no worries, I don't overdo!

I am sorry you are sick and permanently disabled, but am glad that your parents can help out. The surgery will help out your health - I don't think any of us would do this voluntarily unless it did help our health.

Please take care of yourself. I am sure that you told your doctor knows about your other health issues. If you have not, please do. It might take you longer to recover, but with your parents help I am sure you will do well.

Super ((((hugs)))) to you. You are dealing with alot.

This is a long shot but have you looked into alternative medicines like acupuncture to help with the pain? Acupuncture might even be an option after your surgery.

That is definitely something I can look into. I don't know if will work out (contraindications, other medical conditions, etc.) but Thank you for the suggestion!