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Upcoming hysterectomy 6/13: How do I quiet everyone's opinions and expectations without being harsh? Upcoming hysterectomy 6/13: How do I quiet everyone's opinions and expectations without being harsh?

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  #1  
Unread 06-06-2017, 03:08 PM
Upcoming hysterectomy 6/13: How do I quiet everyone's opinions and expectations without being harsh?

My surgery is scheduled for next Tuesday, I am in the home stretch now! I am dealing with a assortment of emotions on a daily basis, everything from anxiety to impending relief. The one thing that has me frustrated/ concerned is that everyone, (except hubby, nurses and physicians) seem to think that after a couple of weeks recovering, I will feel great and will be good as new. While this may be true, I feel like recovery is different for everyone and I feel that their expectations are not what mine are for recovery time, because I know my body the best. I have read different posts about recovery time and issues. I just feel like not talking to them about it anymore because it just gets me worked up. How do I quiet their opinions and expectations without being harsh?
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  #2  
Unread 06-06-2017, 03:32 PM
Re: Everyone....

Just smile and say, "We'll see how things turn out," then ignore them.
  #3  
Unread 06-06-2017, 05:04 PM
Re: Everyone....

One of the reasons that I told almost no one. It worked out great, I didn't have to discuss my surgery with anyone except my husband. That said, it's very possible that they are saying all of that in an attempt to lessen any nervousness you might have about the surgery. Pre surgery, I would not have wanted someone to tell me that I would probably have a long painful recovery! Would MUCH rather have heard what your friends are telling you, even if it turned out not to be true.
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  #4  
Unread 06-06-2017, 05:14 PM
Re: Everyone....

  Quote:
Originally Posted by coughy16 View Post
...Pre surgery, I would not have wanted someone to tell me that I would probably have a long painful recovery! Would MUCH rather have heard what your friends are telling you, even if it turned out not to be true.
I'm extremely pragmatic, to the point where many people regard me as pessimistic. So if people are telling me that, "everything's going to be fine," without providing data to support this, to me this sounds like verbal garbage. I recognize that their intentions may be good, but I still hear their words as verbal garbage.

You know what I would have like to have been told? "You're a strong, smart person. Whether things turn out well or badly, I know you're going to deal with them to the best of your considerable ability. If you need help, you know I'm here for you - give me a call."

Nobody actually told me this, so I said it to myself instead. :-)
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