LAVH: My little moments of horror

Surgery is Friday. On the most part, I'm totally ok, keeping busy with getting things organised and prepared. Every now and then though, I will have a "little moment of horror", such as:

I'm on the table and the doctor opens me up. An expression of shock spreads across his face. He confers in hushed and serious tones with his colleagues before shaking his head sadly and closing me up again, saying "There is absolutely nothing we can do for this poor woman".

I wake up completely paralysed, unable to move and speak, but can hear and see everything, because a massive blood clot has hit my brain.

I wake up with a colostomy bag. The doctor has had a sneezing fit in the middle of surgery and sliced through my bowel in 5 places.

I wake up and it's the year 2037. I've been in a coma for the past 25 years and now all my muscles are atrophied and it's gonna take another 25 years of physio to be able to do anything again.

*Sigh* Ain't the brain a wonderful organ?? I wish it would leave me alone, cos these little moments of horror, no matter how ridiculous or unrealistic, are really putting a downer on the situation, if ya know what I mean!

Yikes! I'm so glad I didn't read this post before my surgery!

It's funny, isn't it, how the mind just goes off on its own in times of stress. I had all these irrational fears beforehand, too, and they were sort of the opposite of yours in that they were all so minor. Like, "Yeah, yeah, risk of death, whatever... but what about the dreaded CANNULA in the back of my hand?!?"

I'm sure you'll come through this with flying colours... they breed us tough down here. And don't forget, you've got the support of thousands of us right here on this board!

LOL ... yep, they sure do! And I'm a trucker, so super tough!!! Feeling good for the most part. Kind of excited and feeling like I'm embarking on a bit of an adventure. Feel even better now after just chatting with my new neighbour who only moved in a few weeks ago. He is going to look after my cats for me, so I don't have to take them to the nasty old cattery! He's the sort of fellow who coos at the dog barking at him over the fence and feeds the maggies mince, so I'm sure my boys will be in good hands with him

Cannula doesn't worry me a bit ... lol. Do anything you like to me IV, but try give me something IM and you'll be peeling me off the ceiling to do it! I'm even thinking of asking them to give me a tetanus shot while I'm under, cos I haven't had one for a while. I even let a friend who's a vet nurse practice inserting IV needles in the back of my hand, just for a giggle!

You are crazy, Kay! Lol

Wow! SOunds like a horror film!
I freaked about having a catheter - how silly as that was so trivial and actually a fantastic thing to have post surgery!

The sooner you get to the surgery the better methinks!! ;-)

Oh My...now I have sooo many more thoughts of horror to think about!!! LOL.

I can so relate! My horror thoughts keep chasing me as I run around cleaning and organizing my little world. Just in case...

Eek, only nine more days of crazy...

Totally how my mind works too.

I also think this a lot " What if there is nothing there and nothing wrong with me?"

What if they leave my uterus and cervix but take my ovaries?

What if...... and the list goes on!

Yep yep yep. The human brain is a fascinanting organ (more so in some than others ... lol). Much apologies for any transferrence of moments of horror! Only 3 days out now and I'm mostly calm and have managed to ridicule my brain into not being so stupid! Not that it doesn't still give me a bit of grief, but nothing I can't handle. I keep telling it ... this is an adventure. I'm always telling people I love a challenge, and they don't come much bigger than this, so I'm trying to see it as an exciting opportunity to have a life experience that not everyone has a chance to go through. (Sheesh, who am I kidding? I'm as scared spitless as Richard Dreyfuss was in Jaws!!!)

:P

i to am terrified of the catheter ...not sure why ? but im sure we will all be fine and so much more healthy.