What to say to nosy co-workers about the surgery?

I work with mostly men, and I just told anyone who asked that I was having surgery. I didn't elaborate. My closer co-worker/friends know, but I didn't announce it. Funny story - one of my male co-workers said "Do you mind if I ask what kind of surgery?" And I said "A hysterectomy." And he said "OOhh, I'm sorry." And I said "Don't be sorry, I'm almost 50 years old, and enough is enough!" And he laughed. The funny part was, I told that story to someone else, and they said "Yeah, he was sorry he asked!!!" I'll bet he was!!
TeeHee!!

I felt the same way about telling some co-workers. Trouble is, it was pretty obvious by my size that something was very wrong. I have worked in the same building for 23 years... so I can't "hide" anything. (LOL) I also knew that by confiding in my friends at work, that others would have a pretty good idea what was going on.

Since I returned to work, I have told a few people ... "I went to OZ to see the WIZARD!!" And I tell the people who I know are really interested, that I am feeling MUCH BETTER!

And I think that's all I need to say.

My boss knows and has been supportive. I don't work closely with anyone else, so this has not been an issue for me.

I was discussing my surgery with my sister and my 12 yr old niece overheard. She asked me why I was having surgery and I told her it was to "make me human again". I reminded her of all the fun things we use to do and how over the past few years I have been grumpy and not wanting to do anything. I told her that after I recovered from the surgery we could get back to doing the fun stuff again. Can't wait to get back to spoiling her rotten.

Shelby

I have a question about this whole privacy thing. Maybe one of you can answer. My school district where I work sent paperwork asking for the details. I'm taking long-term medical leave...hopefully paid leave. Are they asking because they want to know if this surgery is elective? My condition is not "life-threatening."- big big fibroids. I don't mind telling my co-workers, I have already told many of them since I have been so uncomfortable at work, and needed coverage in my classroom for restroom breaks . But I feel wierd sending the info to central office in writing. Any ideas on this?

You sent what kind of paperwork to the school district HQ? I'd call them on the phone and ask them what kind of info they need.

There's a a big range between elective and surgery for life threatening reasons, and those aren't the only 2 categories of surgery. Elective surgery is NOT medically necessary. Elective is face lifts and boob jobs! Just because fibroids aren't cancer doesn't mean the surgery is frivilous.

If you're in the same condition as me, my doctor says, "we tried medical management of the symptoms (i.e. taking hormones and pain pills) but that failed to manage the symptoms or the growth of the fibroids, so surgical treatment is the best option."

I think what I am going to say to people at work is that I am having "medically necessary surgery." I don't like how dorky people can get when they hear about "female problems."

I like the Im having a renovation! lol how funny....
I told alot of people what I was having the office im in is a close knit bunch of people. The nosey ones will be asking when I come back I think I will say OH MY GOSH you dont notice how great my boobs look? ahhaha..
Good luck to all!

At first, I didn't want to tell anyone ... but I quickly realized that if I didn't tell them then they would start making stuff up.

Just tell them you're having a face lift and wait for their reaction when you come back with nothing done!

Privacy and HIPAA...oh boy those legal acronymns were supposed to make things better for everyone. Not always being paid attention too it seems!

I say tell/talk to who you want to talk to about the details if you are comfortable. As for the "central" office...they need to be asked why they need the information and who sees it.

Does your district manage it's own STD and LTD for associates? If so and it sounds like they might...they need to be careful...and you need to be comfortable and careful about what you tell them.. It is not out of the question for you to question them about HIPAA and Privacy. It is your right to know the answers before you share this information. Most employers have gone to using a vendor or carrier to handle this benefit for just this reason. Gets them out of the middle...and then someone else is in the position of making the medical determination and approving or denying...and that is really all your employer or anyone else is entitled to know.

Good luck. If your employer does not use a vendor for this .....I think you and your colleagues need to lobby the local school board to get that changed at some point. The central office is also putting themselves at risk...if a secretary or someone sees you in a few months at the supermarket or post office and says "Hi-how are you doing"?...you will know your confidential files were not handled appropriately and the staff working with them was not trained correctly. This is a legal violation...in the strictest sense. No one should have to worry about that and wonder who (people you know) saw what and what they think.

Last year I told my staff a few days before my surgery I was having surgery, and would be out until mid January or longer. Only one of my employees asked "what are you having done"? I replied "at this time I am not comfortable discussing it...I hope you will just respect my privacy and just wish me well".

I work at a health insurance company...and my employees may well have seen my claims...but not one person ever said a word to me...and no one other than the one insensitive employee probed. She knew better than to ask me that... and I know she regetted it as soon as it came out of her mouth!
Kaegea

Hi. I did tell my staff because I wanted everyone to keep me in their prayers as I have a diagnosis of endometrial cancer. I am the office manager and my staff are also my friends. I can totally understand if others don't choose to share private information.

Whatever your heart tells you to do, you should follow.

Lisa