Scheduled LAVH Countdown has begun...20 days till surgery | HysterSisters
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Countdown has begun...20 days till surgery Countdown has begun...20 days till surgery

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  #1  
Unread 01-04-2012, 11:13 AM
Countdown has begun...20 days till surgery



So my LAVH is scheduled for Jan 24, 2 days before my 44th birthday. I have a history of fibroids, and have had them removed several times before. The last time (3 years ago) my doctor suggested a hysterectomy, but I wasn't ready. I am not nervous about the surgery, but I am not looking forward to laying around for 2 weeks after. My husband and I are in the process of adopting a 9 year old boy. We have no children of our own. We havent told him about the surgery yet, and I am not looking forward to that either. He is a very emotional little boy. I asked my husband if he will go through with the adoption even if I die. Of course he said yes, and then looked at me like why would you ask that. I dont think I am going to die, but it is surgery right. Plus the thought of what if they find something else, is driving me nuts! I am all over the place...sorry. Oh, in addition I have decided not to tell my Mother or Sisters, as they will just stress me out even more. I feel guilty about not telling Mom, but I really think it is best for both of us. We live 500+ miles from her, so she will never know...right?

Anyone else have surgery scheduled for 1/24/12? Any suggestions on telling our son? Any thoughts on not telling my Mom?
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  #2  
Unread 01-04-2012, 05:55 PM
Re: Countdown has begun...20 days till surgery

Hello Cmcoles, I really dont have any answers for you, i just want you to know that you're not alone. I haven't told anyone other than my husband. Main reason being i'm going back and forth worrying if i'm doing the right thing. I'm also worrying about the "what ifs". This forum is a God send! There are so many others here with the same concerns as ours. And whatever you decide to do about your mother, just remember that you made the decision to protect her. I'll keep you in my prayers.
  #3  
Unread 01-04-2012, 06:14 PM
Re: Countdown has begun...20 days till surgery

I am somewhat in a simular boat. I have my TAVH scheduled for Jan 30th. I recently went on a visiting orphans trip to Ethiopia and Rwanda this last summer. I am bringing a 16 yr old from Rwanda here on a student VISA, as Rwanda is closed to adoption and currently in the process of closing all the orphanages. I plan to travel for her embacy app end of Febuary! She doesnt know i am having surgery as i do not want her to worry. She emails me daily saying things like "mum, we in orphanage are OK, but i miss you and am eager to see you. I miss you so much and thank God for you. No ever love me like you, i dont know why. But i so thankful!" Ugh, its killing me. Not sure of i should do 20 total flying hours 4 weeks post op. But what choice do i have? I want it done already.

Major kudos to you for adopting. There are 163,000,000 orphans worldwide. Its staggering.

I dont know how to tell him, as one who isnt telling the daughter of my heart, who i cannpt wait to see.

Tina
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  #4  
Unread 01-04-2012, 08:27 PM
Re: Countdown has begun...20 days till surgery

Hello

Im having my LAVH on the 24th too!! Im so nervous esp the unexpected like what if I do die. I have made my husband promise me to let my kids know how much I love them. He thinks Im nuts but like you said its still surgery right?

I havent told alot of people, but I have told some. Someone on this site told me, Its a big deal and a time in my life where Im going to need a shoulder or too. If you are close to your mom, tell her. WHEN she does find out, they always do, she will be hurt she could not comfort your fears. I know I would be hurt if it was my daughter.

Congrats on your son!!!

BTW im new to this site, but it is def a good send.
  #5  
Unread 01-07-2012, 12:12 AM
Re: Countdown has begun...20 days till surgery

Hi!

The days leading up to surgery can get very looonnngggg..... I can attest to that, as can so many others here at Hyster Sisters.

If you want to connect with others sharing your surgery date, you can click on the calendar and look to see who else shares your date. Also, once you've had surgery, you will all hang out in the same recovery thread, which is a great place to compare notes on healing.

Make sure you do something "just for you" before your surgery. Watch lots of funny TV and movies, as it may be a little uncomfortable to laugh for a few weeks afterwards!

I don't know what to say about keeping this from your mom and sister. They may feel rather betrayed to be kept out of the loop, and it may backfire on you. I think back to when I had my surgery, and I did tell my sisters. When one of my sisters had surgery a few years ago, she also told me and my other sister. However (and this is a HUGE "however") we are very close and wouldn't dream of not supporting each other. If your situation is different, then you need to follow your heart and your gut on this.

I can understand not wanting to tell them before, but you may want to let them know afterwards. You can always tell them that things just moved way too fast, or you wanted to wait until they could visit you during your recovery, or whatever you want to say.

It's just my opinion, but these things usually do not stay "secrets" forever, so it's usually better to just be as honest as you can be, with the story coming out on your terms rather than them finding out through someone else. But there's plenty of time for that after you're home and healing.

as you continue to prepare.
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