Hysterectomy...the big secret.

Sue,

The post wasn't criticizing you so much, but for the other posters who seem to think you need to tell it all to everyone. I'm sure you've got a lot of commonsense and you'll know how to handle the situation.

By the way, I taught school one year and loved the teaching. Left because it was so tiring dealing with parents and politics. Teaching is wonderful!

MissDaisy

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Originally posted by coolaide I agree with you, Miss Daisy, on not telling ALL to my student. I know the parents well and I know they will tell him what LITTLE he needs to know. These kids do need alot of reassurance and I did alot of that before I left. I also agree and have no problem discussing my hysterectomy with any adult that wants to know about it. I think men are alot more open minded about that kind of thing than they used to be. Family men have been alot more open than I thought they would be, over Christmas when people asked about it. Sue

Oh yeah, girl!! My coworkers knew everything about it! If they hadn't heard of endometriosis before, they got a lesson on it during the summer of 1997.

The thing is, I tried to be discreet...especially around the men, but they would ask pointed questions. So hey, you asked - I'm telling.

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The interesting thing is since I've been so open about my experience, women are literally coming out of the woodwork with stories about their own problems (not necessarily hysterectomies but "female" problems in general. I am amazed at how many women I know have had SERIOUS problems and never said a word! It's like a big cover-up and people are afraid to talk about issues that involve their reproductive organs.

I encountered that, too!

I even had someone come up to me in a restaurant because one of their co-workers knew me and she had told her to come talk to me about going through endometriosis!! It was actually pretty funny!

It's good to know that our suffering may help others, huh?

Something in one of the posts sparked a repressed memory in me! I ran into my dads best friend one day at work...It was so embarrasing and almost humbling to me. He told me he had had surgery.... Being raised proper like, and always polite, I asked him how he was doing and what he had surgery on....He told me he had his prostate removed because he had prostate cancer etc....Ok Dads best friend, completely and totally embarrassed, what do you say, how do you respond. Well as glib as i could possibely choke out, I told him "how nice for you!"

This is the same thing, just the different sexes. He was in his 70's and here I am young, hip and cool and could not deal with his disclosure. And then made a you know what out of myself because I could not handle knowing that info!! And yes, my mom was a huge help, she laughed when I told her the conversation!!

Oh the humilitation....
Hugs
Kat

I didn't think you were criticising me, Miss Daisy. I totally agree with all you have said. I have enjoyed your responses, as well as everyone elses.

I work at the high school and I also have a freshman daughter there. I know alot of the kids there and other than her close friends, she hasn't had too many questions about where I've been. I wonder how many I'll get when I get back to work. A couple of the parents I know have had a hysterectomy and their kids know all about it, or so they think.

Sue

I have such a hard time saying the word hysterectomy, and I didn't really talk with many friends before the surgery. These threads are helping me understand my reluctance and embarrassment.


I've been open with my daughters and son a lot about it post-op, and this all makes me more resolved to in the future.

My husband's mother died when he was a teenager from complications from a DNC. He was out of town and didn't even get to say good-bye. I worried how he would handle this, but he has been a sweetheart. I hope his mom is in heaven looking down on what a dear son she raised.

As a young woman I was sadly uneducated about my reproductive organs. I had no idea what was normal or how everything was connected "down there".

I suffered in silence for years with painful periods. I thought everybody did. I learned all too late that what I had been experiencing for years was not just "bad periods" but pain from endometriosis. By the time I was diagnosed in my 30's and had my first laproscopy, my endo was extensive. Since that time, my treatment has basically been trying to slow it down and treat the pain as long as possible. I think that if I had known more about what was normal and what wasn't, I would have gotten treatment much earlier and may have actually been able to conceive a child.

I guess what I'm suggesting is that for young women, an understanding of women's health issues is critical for their future health. We owe it to them to be open and honest.

I was looking at some pictures of our female organs before and after hyst because I wanted to see what it would be like inside me after. You know curiously.
Anyway, while I was looking at these pictures my 9 year son came up to me and asked what it was that I was looking at. I just explained too him that is what it looks like on my insides and at the same time I showed him the parts that the doc had taken out. He thought that was interesting. He looked and then left.

I think it helped him to understand a little about what had happened to mom and how careful he had to be with me. I also think how much you tell kids depends on their age and what they are capable of understanding.

Hello all you wonderful hystersister!!

What a timely thread! I work in a large teaching hospital - one of the women I work with(around my age) is going in tomorrow for her TAH/BSO. We have chatted alot these past 6 weeks while she was waiting...I wanted to give her any infor she needed (highly recommeded this site!) , answer any questions - from sex to what to pack.......reassured her everything will be fine that she has a terrific dr. etc. etc. Last Friday I asked to switch lunch with another gal so I could have a good chat & give my friend a gift. My boss overheard me and said that so & so will be in Monday...I said that I knew that, but I needed to talk to her today. I loved all the looks I got - I knew they were thinking "I wonder what is so important that it needs to be discussed TODAY?".. not one other person - & they're ALL women said a thing to me & we work in the medical field...all of you are 100% correct - lots of educating needs to be done. When I had my hyster my son was 18 yo, he got on the internet & learned alot about hysterectomies.....he was my angel. My dr. was arrogant & uncaring & my husband left alot to be desired. I don't want another woman I know of, going through this alone. I still talk about my hyster to anyone male or female who will listen. My friend called me tonight to chat - you know, those "the night before jitters" & she said that she feels special, like she belongs to a very exclusive club. She's right... we made a medical decision that we knew would take us into the land of the unknown, but we had faith & courage so we went forward, even though we were scared to death! We might not be able to educate the world, but we can hold someone elses hand and lend all of our support!

Very deep, eubbie. Excellent food for thought!

When my Mother had her hysterectomy (I was 14 years old at the time), it just was not discussed much. I knew the surgery must have been pretty rough, though, because my Dad bought her the most beautiful white mink coat I have ever seen to this day.....and we were not wealthy.

As a nurse, even I did not understand.....until I had the surgery. When other nurses returned to work postop hyster, they NEVER discussed being anything other than being back to normal. Of course, there DOES seem to be a code of martyrdom among nurses...........we pamper our patients, but expect each other to be superhuman. Well.....I've taken care of that in MY workplace! You can BET that they all knew that....just because my FMLA was over.....did not mean I was 100%!! At first, they reacted as if I was a big weenie...........until the others spoke up......the ones who'd had the surgery themselves. They were the first to help me on the job, then the others followed suit. As a result, we all pay more attention to our returning sisters. Support is a beautiful thing.

Amen!! I went to the grocery store and had the bag boy take my purchases to my car. I told him that I had had surgery and couldn't lift for awhile. He ask me what kid, and I told him hysterectomy and he said whats that???? Okay, he was at least 18 or 19. Didn't he take health or science in high school?
wondergram