I swear if one more person.....

Tells me how lucky I am not to have a period anymore because they have asked me (more then once) if I had a tampon, midol or a pad I will scream...my usual response is

"Yes look how lucky I am, I got to trade my uterus for a huge bowl of tolerance so I can deal with your stupidity"

If one more nurse or doctor asks me when my last period was even though they have my file in front of them that has it practically in lights that I have had a hysterectomy...grrrr

If one more person asks me how come I was so selfish and only had one child and do I want her to be alone, with no company" OMG

If one person asks me if I still pee properly! if anything is loose in there! Will it grow back! I mean where are these people living? under a rock I can only assume.

There that was my vent and I fell much better!

	Quote:
Originally Posted by Trixi1972 Tells me how lucky I am not to have a period anymore because they have asked me (more then once) if I had a tampon, midol or a pad I will scream...my usual response is "Yes look how lucky I am, I got to trade my uterus for a huge bowl of tolerance so I can deal with your stupidity" If one more nurse or doctor asks me when my last period was even though they *****g have my file in front of them that has it practically in lights that I have had a hysterectomy...grrrr If one more person asks me how come I was so selfish and only had one child and do I want her to be alone, with no company" OMG If one person asks me if I still pee properly! if anything is loose in there! Will it grow back! I mean where are these people living? under a rock I can only assume. There that was my vent and I fell much better!

OMG... Its only been 2 months since MY Hyst... and I had NOOOO idea what clods people can be! Sheesh! I work with mostly females in an office environmenrt. My ovaries are still shuddering themselves awake a bit so I have a few more spells of hot sweats than usual, but they're subsiding.

These WOMEN ( a few anyway) actually had the gall to ask me in the break room (while they were all cackling over coffee) :burning: if the Hyst "clinically" turned me into a ******... Can you believe it???

Gawd, I wanted to slap each and every one of them!!! :burning: :burning:

One of my VERY good friends asked me "do you feel empty inside?" UGH

	Quote:
Originally Posted by scrapbookbabe One of my VERY good friends asked me "do you feel empty inside?" UGH

omg, I got asked that question by almost all of my close female friends. One friend asked me that while I was still in the hospital, completely pumped with medication and a six inch incision going across my belly. Hello!!! I also find the comment about how lucky I am not to bleed every month really trying. I know some of the people are just trying to say something "cheery" about it, but it doesn't really work. oh well. I'll have to come up with a cool answer to these crazy questions.

	Quote:
Originally Posted by scrapbookbabe One of my VERY good friends asked me "do you feel empty inside?" UGH

no, not really

I was only about a week or maybe 9 days out of surgery and wanted to go for a little ride with DH because the weather was nice. We stopped at a pet store for only a minute to look at fish (my DD brought me a small aquarium when I was in the hospital so I could look at it during recovery). I told the chatty saleslady that I was only going to stay for a very short time because I'd just had surgery and needed to get back home. She asked about it, got excited and wanted to know a lot of things. I told her that she could look up this site. As we were leaving she said to me, rather loudly, "WELL, AT LEAST YOU DON'T HAVE TO RIDE THE CRIMSON TIDE ANYMORE!" I just cringed and told my husband that I needed to get out of there. I don't know if she ever found this site but if she should read this, just file it under, 'What not to say'. Sheesh!

I can just see in your words how much all of this is hurting you.

I think so many people think that hysterectomy is a choice we make to rid ourselves of periods. What they don't realize is that it's usually (at best) a mixed blessing. Yes, many of us have difficult (or even debilitating) menstruation. But the tradeoff is often no better and can even be worse.

These are very hurtful comments that have been made to you. I can only imagine how heart-breaking it is to feel the pangs of pure pain which are inflicted when you hear them.

It has been several years since your surgery, but the wounds still seem to be pretty raw for you. If you continue to have difficulty in this area, I wonder if seeking out a counselor would help? I'm not talking about long-term therapy here...but sometimes just a couple of sessions with someone can do a world of good. Just someone to sit and listen, to validate your feelings.

Another tool I've found to be very helpful to me is to keep a journal (either hand-written or on the computer). There's something about seeing the feelings expressed in the written word which really helps me. Yes, sometimes the feelings are painful and the words make the tears stream down my face. But eventually I can move beyond the anger to feel the pain, then finally soften a bit to come to an acceptance of what is going on.

You are a beautiful, worthy woman and you deserve much happiness. I am so proud of you for being able to come here and express yourself this way. It's OK to express anger and frustration, but that only gets you so far. Here's hoping that you'll find a way to work through some of this. I don't mean forget it, or "get over it", but process it.

to you.

Thank you for your kind words. For the most part I just shake my head at the ingorance involved in their comments.

The doctor is going back in the same way in the new year and I guess it has brought it all to a head again you know? I thought it was all done with and now this endo has come so it's bye bye left ovary.

As soon as I heard I logged on here because it was such a great help the last time. This place is definately a haven for me.

Agreed on the only having one child deal! I am 31 (almost 32) and I had my daughter when I was 21. Her father and I were married for a year when I got pregnant, and separated/divorced when she was 8 months old. I met my current husband a year after that and we have been together 8 1/2 years. He is 10 years older than I am and had a not so good childhood. Because of that, he decided in his early 20's that he did not want to have any children of his own and had a vasectomy. I feel like when people tell us that we need to have a baby together that they are butting in to what we consider a great relationship and family that we have. My ex and I still get along great, and my daughter has the best of both worlds. My daughter isn't growing up alone...she has me, I am very involved with everything she does, she has her father, who is a wonderful dad to her and a great ex husband, and she has my husband, who is also a wonderful father to her. She has plenty of friends, cousins, and extended family. And, I probably couldn't carry another child to term anyway. My body tried to miscarry her when I was 8 weeks pregnant, and I went into labor twice before I actually gave birth to her (she was 5 weeks premature). She is healthy, happy, beautiful, smart, well behaved, funny, and she is all mine! ha ha So, Trixi, I understand where you are coming from. Just remember that not everyone knows what other people may go through in their life for them to come to the decisions they have made....I just tell people that if they think I should have another child, they can do it for me and pay me child support and baby-sit, and then they will be happy because another kid lives in my house! (sorry, i am now laughing out loud because i never really rant like this!)

I am glad you stated that, I feel the same way. I only recently had my hysterectomy and all I hear is "but you won't have a period any more"... grrrr. I have other pet peaves in this area also, but I'll just leave it at that. Its good to hear others experiences, It makes me feel as if I'm not this odd person so much anymore. This is definitely a roller coaster of emotions for me. :-(