Chris:
to you! I know this feeling. My DH has the patience of a saint (well, except when he's in Los Angeles traffic, but that's another story
). But he will often come home, look around, and I know what he's thinking even though it's left unsaid.
Of course, it helps that I never was a very good housekeeper anyway, but before things got so bad for me, I used to do ALL the cooking, even when I worked late. Now he does it at least one or two days a week...and the housework is still below his standards.
Your symptoms of exhaustion are very common with the heavy bleeding and pain that come with adeno. Pain alone is exhausting, and if you're like many women with adeno, you may be a bit (or more) on the anemic side from bleeding. How are your blood counts? Can you show these to your partner and/or family? Not that they should need ANY explanation, but if you're severely anemic, no one should question your fatigue or pain.
I found that many housework chores were even more painful with adeno; the low backache and cramping that came with sweeping or vacuuming were pretty intense. And even now, my kids know that I refuse to pick up ANYTHING off the floor -- if it's left there, and I have to pick it up after a day or two, I just might choose to throw it away
! It does help, some, to keep things down around here!
I also started cooking meals that had two meals, like a tri-tip roast one night with French dip sandwiches the next. The leftovers are easy enough for anyone to prepare, and then you've only worked on one "good" day.
Your periods are YOUR experience, not that of the female members of your family. Perhaps, after all, they have adeno too! But no one should have to go through the anemia, bleeding, etc. just because "it's normal". My mother, too, minimized my periods and pain for years; it wasn't until I had a laparoscopy at the age of 20 that they diagnosed severe adhesions (endo was still little known back then, with laparoscopy in its infancy). No one knows your experience but YOU.
That being said, have you gotten a second opinion? It's always a good idea, particularly with endo. There are differing ways of dealing with the endo aspect of your problem, and getting at least one other perspective (if not more) is so important to help you sort out what choices you do have. With adeno, a hyst (unfortunately) is the only "cure", but your endo may have other options that you could explore if you feel not quite ready for this surgery yet. And, if you are, having that choice confirmed by a second, or even third
medical (not family) opinion makes all the difference in how you feel about your outcome!
Do some research into the hormone therapy options for afterward, too; our own
Hormone Jungle is a great place to start!
Good luck to you. In the end, this is YOUR decision, made in conjunction with your DH, doctor (s) and your own heart. And I'm sure that your DH wants what is best for you -- bringing him to doctor's appointments with you will go a long way to "explaining" what's going on in the most thorough way.
Audrey