Upcoming hysterectomy 10/11: i'm freaking out

These last few days i've had a massive anxiety attack about my hysterectomy.

11 years ago i had my 2nd child and new i didnt want more kids so i asked to be steralised which i was by clips.

So i started natural periods for the first time since i was 17, and all the problems came back painful painful periods and flooding. So after treatments and medication i was given a balloon ablation where by the insert a 'balloon' into my womb and inflate it with hot liquid which burns the inside of my womb. This really helped my flow and i am very light in my periods now.

However the pain was still the same, i am on mefanemic acid for it, but i have to catch it at the right time and if i dont it doesnt kick in and i am left in agony for hours sometimes days.

So my last option is a hysterectomy which i;m scheduled to have in two weeks taking, cervix, womb and tubes.

I;m just having a massive attack of the what if's.....

what if sex isnt the same
what if i never orgasm again
what if it takes me ages to recover (work are being mega awkward)

I also am self employed and i was supposed to be meeting some over seas clients its been booked in for months and my operation has fallen right before my meeting with them which has honkerblonked them off a bit.

This months period was bad, but last months was ok....and im getting scared and wondering should i just take the medication for however long i have my periods for (im 38).

i'm truly scared i'm not going to be the same after the operation.

Hi. Maybe stick with the meds longer and be super vigilant with taking them at correct time. Keep a journal too about what makes the pain better, etc.
Try everything...mstrbation, exercise, etc..
If you ultimately decide on surgery, try to keep cervix. I truly believe it helps sexual function and pelvic support. Best!

I'm not sure what you would consider "ages" for recovery. Usually it's some weeks before women can go back to work, anywhere from two to six. Of course, it depends a lot on how much physical activity is involved in your work. If your work's very physical, if it involves a lot of travel, etc., that's going to take longer.

Sex and orgasm usually (not always) *are* different after surgery. They may or may not be just as satisfying, but they're usually different.

A hysterectomy is major surgery and should be a last resort. If you're still thinking that maybe it wouldn't be so bad being on the medication for the next 12 or so years, then you're not ready to have a hysterectomy.

Hi manchester38 -

Having a hysterectomy is MAJOR SURGERY and needs to be considered very carefully. You have to weigh the pros and cons with your current health situation. It is normal to have second thoughts, but if you are having serious concerns you may want to get alternate opinions - you may still have other options. Do I Need a Second Opinion for My Hysterectomy?. You may also be able to put off your surgery until after your very important meeting.

The unknowns after this surgery are always scary. You do not know how it will be for you until you are there. Recovery is different for everyone, but you do need to think in terms of weeks and not days. You will need help with cooking, cleaning, dishes, laundry, shopping, driving, etc. You will not be bedridden, but you will need to rest much. You will be doing brief but frequent walks during recovery as these help you heal.

Sex after surgery is different for everyone. Some say it is better, some say worse, some say the same and everywhere in between.

Here are articles that may help provide information:
Hysterectomy Recovery Time
Hysterectomy Recovery Tips
Too Much Too Soon After Hysterectomy?

10 Concerns about Intimacy after Hysterectomy
Will Sex Be Different after Hysterectomy?
Intimacy after Hysterectomy | Better or Worse?

Think about this carefully, do more research, and make the best decision for you. We will support you.

manchester38, you're in the UK, yeah? I don't know what it's like there for getting second opinions. Here in Canada it's a bit difficult. You have to go back to the referring doc, explain why the doc they referred you to isn't suitable for you and get a new referral. This automatically breaks your relationship with the first doc, so you can't go back to them.

Given what your current doc told you about your cervix, as you described in another thread, it sounds to me as if your current doc is no loss! I would definitely suggest going back to your referring doc for a new referral if this is something your system allows you to do.

I wish there were a little smiley breathing into a paper bag to use here - because I had zero doubts about my hyst and I was still freaking out days before the surgery. It's a big decision and it's a major surgery. Try to breathe, though. Whatever happens, you'll be okay.

Since your surgery isn't on any particular timeline, if you need to take a few weeks or months to reconsider, by all means, you should - there's no unringing this bell! But if you decide that you definitely want the surgery, it'd still be normal to have second thoughts. I was given options about what surgery I wanted and I took weeks, even though I knew what I was ultimately going to choose - I just needed a little time to sit with it to make sure.

For what it's worth, I was mostly fully functional after two weeks, and my sex life hasn't suffered for it. They took everything but my ovaries. And I feel so much better with my horrible periods gone for good. No more living my entire life based around them! For me it was the right decision. Ultimately, trust that you can make this call for yourself and be okay with whatever decision you make, because you can and you will be!

Thanks guys.....

The surgeon was lovely and talked me through everything about the procedure and my condition and why its happened. I trust him, its not until i started to google and then found this place that i knew about the whole cervix and sex thing. my husband is super supportive.

My operation is scheduled for the 11th October i have my preop today and i'll be chatting to my nurse about all my anxieties.

My condition is kind of like endometriosis, because of the balloon ablation its caused my womb to be thin so it means that my period breaks off and goes through the lining of my womb which believe me is extremely painful and after 10 years i finally have the diagnosis in June this year.

I know its normal to have the anxieties and doubts, this is the unkown and i'm not going to know how its going to be after. I'm not afraid to admit i'm **** scared of how my life will be after!