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Unread 05-19-2003, 07:23 PM
surgery date set

My surgery date is set for June 2. I went in today for preadmission testing. After doing blood work, an EKG and a chest x-ray, now I am being sent back tomorrow for an Echo cardiogram to make sure that I don't have a leaky valve. Two weeks from today I am being operated on and I am feeling a tremendous amount of pressure. My job is being great about taking the time off but the problem is that they want me to have everything done for the end of our fiscal year(which is June 30) done before I go. I have less than two weeks left and feel like I am drowning. I am trying to get my household affairs in order and my job. I know this is something that everyone experiences but it is all overwhelming. Then I have been worrying about the surgery and wills and who will take care of my son if something happens. My normal sleep schedules are totally off base. Then I have to worry about the money on top of everything. I only have enough sick/vacation time to pay half pay during my time off. As a single parent this is really scary to me. I have been reading entries on this site for several weeks and felt like this is one of the only places that I can talk about things. My son is only 15 and is scared enough without me talking about it at home. Most people don't want to listen to my fears and just keep telling me that everything is okay or they just change the subject. I have had a couple of nasty nightmares and I am having a difficult time relaxing, not to mention concentrating. Does anybody have any words of wisdom??
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Unread 05-19-2003, 07:56 PM
My Heart Goes out to you

Amy, I am so sorry for all you having to deal with prior to surgery. I can't imagine being a single parent with a 15 year old trying to get work things done and your home affairs in order. I don't know how I would do it

I have a dh who is wonderful and does more than his fair share. My two dear sons are in college and law school and will only be home to visit this summer. I have been in your work shoes at points in my life and I know how stressful that can be. I can only imagine trying to close out a fiscal year. My current job is fairly low stress so that is wonderful. I have 43 days before my tvh/bso

I don't know what to tell you. I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers and just know you have alot of support here on hyster sisters. Try to take one thing at a time. With your many hats you wear I realize that is easier said than done.

HUGS and take care.

Unread 05-20-2003, 12:07 PM
surgery date set

Hi Amy,

I was busy training my replacement and moving the office right up to the week before my surgery. On one hand I was glad I was so busy because it kept my mind off of things. On the other hand, I wanted and NEEDED time to get my personal life in order.

As for your son, do you know who would get custody by legal default if you weren't available? Usually it's the biological father no matter what wishes you state in a will. If the bio-dad isn't in the picture then a guardian like a grandparent or other relative would take your place. If there are non-relatives who you want to take guardianship, you'll need a will but please remember, the odds that anything will happen to you are EXTREMELY slim!

That said, all I'd work on until you have more time for this is to make sure your son is cared for financially. Assign a beneficiary to all your bank accounts and, of course, on your life insurance policy. All this can be settled very quickly with just a phone call or two. At the hospital you'll have a chance to fill out an advanced directive for medical decisions in case you're not aware enough to make those decisions for yourself. All that should be sufficient for now. Again, remember, you'll probably be FINE. Hysterectomy isn't normally considered a life-threatening surgery.

As for work, ignore them. Do what you can but don't make yourself sick and exhausted before your surgery. YOU are far more important than any year-end reporting. REALLY! Only you can take care of you. The company WILL survive without you. (If they can't then you should be part-owner not an employee!)

I'm betting everything will be fine. How wonderful it'll be to have a 15 yr old son around to do all the heavy lifting for you. I hope he's prepared to do the vacuuming, too! (Yes, men can vacuum.)

Look forward to the time you'll have with your son during your post-op recovery. That'll be a precious start to a lovely summer.
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Unread 06-02-2003, 09:21 PM
thanks for the response!

Thanks for all of your encouraging words...Sometimes I let the anxiety overtake me!

It looks like I will have more time to ponder my situation since my surgery was postponed until July!

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