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Unread 05-30-2003, 08:50 AM

I am feelling so overwhelmed. Before I had my hysterectomy I was feeling better than I had felt in years. I really thought I was going to be able to finally have a normal life. Whatever that means. I've had lasting pain that I thought was connected with the hernia that developed immediatly after the surgery but wasn't diagnosed for about a year after. (I did keep asking and I can't believe six doctors didn't recognize a hernia!!)

Anyway, now I'm in Pain Management. I'm told the main pain is nerve damage that they think will heal. I have my doubts, as it's been there since the first surgery and the second surgery only made it worse. Neurontin is making a difference but not enough to let me function as well as I would like, so of course I have to deal with whether or not to take more narcotic drugs. There's only one I tolerate so I hesitate to use it too much. Saving it for potential need in the future . . .

My bowel disease has flared since my last surgery and I can't seem to get it under control. I'm trying. The stress level here is very high and that's not helping. There's not a lot I can do about it right now. I think when my dd finally moves out with my gd I'll at least get more rest. That should help. And that will be in July.

Last night was the dress rehearsal for my gd dance recital. Tonight is the dress rehearsal for my younger daughter's dance recital. And both recitals are on Saturday. No way am I not going to go but now, to top it all off, I have a beet red sore throat and feel like death warmed over.

Does anybody else get a little worried that this will never end? My doctor wants me to come in to discuss the x-rays of my cervical spine. I already have the results (he doesn't know it but I got them to take to the Osteopath I'm seeing). So I know he thinks the impingement that showed up is something to talk about. Fortunately the Osteopathic treatments worked miracles and the pain is almost all gone. That's a plus.

The business my dh is trying to get off the ground is floundering and we are all out of money and he is all out of paid work. I'm fighting to not have to remortgage the house, as it is my haven. We've made it safe for my chemical sensitivities and it's affordable no matter what.

Do I belong on Aching Hearts or what? I feel like this is my home.

Oh, you know what they say: Life is hard and then you die.
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Unread 05-30-2003, 10:38 AM


I can so relate to what you've said. I too since my second surgery haven't yet been the "same" <whatever that was>

You know I've lost my job now. My 19 year old dd is moving back home <and that is good and not good>

My poor husband is working his butt off and I don't have the energy to even finish a home study test that will keep my cont. prof. education going to stay a registered tax preparer....although I have till Oct. 31st to renew my license.....

I have good days and bad days as you've seen by my posts. I think you are having a "bad day" and you need to allow yourself to have those days. We've been through a lot.

All I can offer is a (((((((((((((((((HUG)))))))))))) and know that you are NOT alone.


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