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Unread 06-18-2003, 11:27 AM
Morbid well meaning family/friends

Well I just have the wierdest most morbid gazillion phone calls of my life.
My mother calls to let me know she receeved my living will/health care proxy. (12.00 online anyone interested pm me for the link) Now she wants to where is my will and funeral info. Just in case. Then my sister who wants to tell me all about her horrible c section that she equates to having a TAH. And then is upset that I didn't ask her for blood.
I then got a series of calls from friends and cousins who now "know" and want to offer advice, pearls of wisdom, and leagl advice "just in case".
Do I have a sign on me that I can't see that says "Linda is having surgery and she is going to die so let us all scare her with our kindness"? Frankly I am buzzing around enough.
I personally decided not to update my will but did do a living will and health care proxy. Other than that I am not dwelling on the "just in case" scenarios.
I have 24 days to go so I have been cooking and freezing meals for here and cleaning and re-doing my lair.
I put the phone off the hook and turned off my cell phone but I did leave Bob's on (for work). He has agreed to this for the next few days to ward off the "just in casers"<BG>.
Good luck to all going in tomorrow, hope everything comes out alright<BG>.
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Unread 06-18-2003, 11:35 AM
Morbid well meaning family/friends


Maybe you should take your phone off the hook for a while !!!

You will have to just block them out hon.

As for the living will/proxy thing. Our hospital will give them to you for free you just fill them out and have them witnessed by 2 people who are not in the will. So ask your hospital ladies.

Best wishes for your surgery,

Unread 06-18-2003, 11:52 AM
Morbid well meaning family/friends

Hi Linda

I didn't have my family and friends bug me about it, but the hospital sure did!!! Enev when I told them I have a living will, they still kept at it. I wanted to scream to the whole word that I HAVE A WILL AND I DON"T PLAN ON DYING!!!!, but I didn't.

Please try to ignore them as much as you can. I know it's hard, but they are truely looking out for you in the way they know how to. They may not know how much they are bugging you - maybe trying to tell them that it is all settled will calm their feelings. If not, ignoring them when they talk about it will get your point across. Remember, they may be trying to help you out just not in the way you need right now.

Sending you a big

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Unread 06-18-2003, 11:55 AM
Morbid well meaning family/friends

I'm so glad I told only one sister, and a few close friends about my surgery (and of course, co-workers) I live 350 miles away from family, and felt this surgery was way too personal to want to discuss, esp. with my mom (I gave her no grandchildren :-(

I found all the paperwork very scary, seemingly signing my life away! But I also know that this is very common surgery.

Keep a positive attitude. Keep informed. Ask questions!. This a great site to get support from. Good luck avoiding the "well-wishers"
Unread 06-19-2003, 06:30 AM
Morbid well meaning family/friends

It is a federal and state requirement (law or code?) that we ask patients about their living wills and durable power of attorney for health care. We really have no choice to remain in compliance and keep the hospital open. They really do audit for this. I always tell people that it has no bearin on how they will do or mean they might ot make it but tell them about the Federal requirement and they are usually ok with that. If you have a living will or durable power of atty, take it with you to the hospital. Our hospital will keep it on file and if you come back in for anything the patient then can say I gave you a copy before and they pull it and put it on the new chart.

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