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I need to vent...... I need to vent......

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  #1  
Unread 12-31-2003, 12:22 PM
I need to vent......

Okay, this morning I went in for an ultrasound because I'm having SEVERE pain on my left side (could be the remaining ovary, but the surgeon isn't convinced of that).

Anyways...the technician doing the ultrasound asks what I'm having it done for. When I mention the hysterectomy she says, " You are sooooo lucky, I want to have one since I'm done having kids and I hate having periods"! Okay...I just wanted to smack her (I'm not a violent person)! I'm taking vicodin every 4 hours to deal with this never-ending pain...I've had nothing but problems since my hyster and the only reason I'm there in her x-ray room is because of post-op complications! Geesh!

Then she goes on to talk about her children and shows me pictures of them! She asked me how many children I had and I told her "none". She then said, "Why did you have the hysterectomy then, did you not want any children"?

Can you see why I'm angry??? I don't understand how someone could be so ignorant. I had the hyster because I was in severe pain and I couldn't find any other solution! She thinks it's a great way to end annoying periods. Grrrrrrrrr.

BTW...the room I was in had pictures of babies on this huge wall-board (the kind with tacks to hang pics and stuff). I know it's an ultrasound room, but ultrasounds are not just used for babies. I'm not usually all that sensitive to the baby thing...but I don't like it pushed into my face either. Having pictures there, along with this obnoxious tech, girl just pushed me too far today...

And now I'm in more pain because of the test...so I'm not too happy about anything today.

Thanks for letting me vent. I know you ladies understand this stuff.

Rita
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  #2  
Unread 12-31-2003, 12:51 PM
I need to vent......

((((Rita)))),
I'm so sorry you had to endure that I feel blessed by being able to carry 3 children but I still sometimes find myself looking enviously at the expecting Mothers & moreso at newborns I cant even begin to imagine the pain & hurt you must feel when seeing this & having to hear such things as you did!
I've been praying this U/S holds some answers for some permanent relief to the pain you suffer... pain that I know all to well. Such constant, severe pain really takes a toll on you in all aspects of your life. You need & deserve some relief to this....I wish I held some answers for you but I don't
I DO have lots support, prayers & compassion for an awesome (((Sister)))...no need to ask..pls know it is always here when/if you need it
Hang in there...((((((((hugs))))))))
  #3  
Unread 12-31-2003, 01:38 PM
I need to vent......

Rita:



I'm so sorry you had to put up with all of that. Dealing with pain is bad enough without also having to deal with an insensitive tech. If you feel like it, report her. She probably has no clue how insensitive she is and you could be sparing others the experience you had.

I hope your pain eases soon. I'm sure the stress did not make matters better. I'm glad you came here and vented. Hopefully that made you feel better.

If you want to, when you receive your test results, let us know what was found and what steps you are taking from there.

You know, we care!
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  #4  
Unread 12-31-2003, 02:46 PM
I need to vent......

(((Rita)))
I am sorry that the technician was so insensitive. Some people just don't have a clue!

I will say that for me, over the years I have become less sensitive to the stupid remarks that people make when I am at the doctor or having tests. I actually kind of enjoy the look on their face when they ask when my last period was and I say "1999".

Hang in there my friend I hope the ultrasound will provide some clues and some answers to your ongoing pain.
  #5  
Unread 12-31-2003, 11:50 PM
I need to vent......

  Quote:
I actually kind of enjoy the look on their face when they ask when my last period was and I say "1999".
(((Kim))), I, too, have been known to find a perverse sort of joy in watching their faces when I respond that way. At my last mammogram appointment I filled out the box where the form said "LMP" as "January 2002"... when I turned in the clipboard, the receptionist actually came out from behind the counter and stared at me and said "you don't look that old!" (whatever that old is?). In front of a waiting room full of women! I replied "I'm not... I've been pregnant for the last 22 months... could we get on with this please?" If I had been able to hold back the giggles I think I would have actually had her going for a minute there

(((Rita))) I am so sorry you encountered such an insensitive tech. You know, when you've had a chance to let the anger dissipate a little, you might want to consider writing her a short letter expressing how it made you feel... so she won't do that again to another Princess the next time the situation arises. I bet it didn't even occur to her that you might not have chosen to have the hyst .

Also, you could enclose a printable flyer from this site and invite her to visit us... maybe even add a couple of links to threads that might serve to open her eyes a bit? I know it's not your job to educate people who make ignorant remarks like that, but I find that doing that tends to turn the situation around to one where I can ultimately feel pretty good.

When do you get the results from the ultrasound? I'm curious to hear what they saw... when they did an ultrasound on me during the process of diagnosing my diverticulitis, absolutely nothing showed up... the tech, a young guy, said "wow, there's nothing in there". It took a CT with contrast to find it. I hope you get some answers soon... it hurts to see you in such pain!

s,
-Linda
  #6  
Unread 01-01-2004, 02:49 AM
I need to vent......

(((Rita))):

You need to complain to the administrator in whatever facility you had the study done. Part of our job is to understand what is appropriate patient interaction, frankly, and I would hate to have you think that this level of insensitivity is a normal behavior for those of us who are sonographers. I'd love to believe that my ultrasound compatriots are more empathetic than that; the level of unprofessionalism you experienced is inexcusable, and a good administrator will respond to that.

You could even just "cut and paste" what you wrote to us; it's pretty clear-cut how unprofessional and inappropriate her response was.

I sure hope you get some answers soon; this kind of messing around with test after test itself is so stressful, and that much more so when you're in pain! .



Audrey
  #7  
Unread 01-01-2004, 12:41 PM
I need to vent......

Oh ((((Rita))))) I'm so sorry you had to endure that woman's unprofessionalism on top of dealing with the on-going pain and all the stress of not having a diagnosis

One thing I've learned, since having my hyst, is that some people, men and women alike, young and old, are confusing a "hyst" with a "tubal". The first time I was made aware of that was when my BIL and SIL visited, with their 3 1/2 yo and 13 mo DD's, whenI was 2 weeks post-op: despite having been told about my surgery, BIL, seeing the swelly belly, asked if I was expecting another one When I explained about the surgery, SIL then said that it was about time she had one, now that they had the two kids... after going , I realized that she thought I'd had a tubal. I simply explained the difference, and that was that with them. What's confusing though, is that apparently intelligent, educated people still do not realize what the word "hyst" stands for. And, correct me if I'm wrong, but wouldn't you still be having periods after a tubal????

Sorry for venting on your vent ((((Rita))))). I hope that u/s reveals what is going on your abs, so that you can start getting relief.
  #8  
Unread 01-01-2004, 12:46 PM
I need to vent......

Oh Rita,

I am so sorry for the hardness of that woman's heart and the effect it has had on you. I am afraid for her, because I believe that lessons return to those who need them, and it is clear she is going to have a very hard one, someday, to teach her sensitivity, as she has none.

Sister, you have been made so much more whole in your heart by this surgery and your physical suffering than such a woman as this -- my wish for you and every other sister suffering with physical or emotional pain today, is that we have a glimpse of how this may be in each of our lives, that we have somehow been made more than we were through our suffering and pain, just a glimpse, even, to help us get through the pain -- and know that we are made more noble, because we are suffering now.

Take care. I agree it is worth maybe a cut and paste from the post, to save another princess pain.

God bless you in this new year,
With love,
Loretta
  #9  
Unread 01-02-2004, 11:47 AM
Thank you ladies...

Thank you all so much for your understanding.

Because being angry only amplifies pain (and in general it's just not fun) I'm going to compile your thoughts on this and insight (you ladies are awesome) and I'm going to do the following:

1) put together printed information about this site, and hysterectomies.

2) Drop off one of these packets (I'm going to put them in a purple folder) for the tech who did my U/S on Wednesday. I will add a letter to her explaining how upsetting it was to have her misunderstand my situation (I will be very nice...I'm not wanting to bash her). I will also explain the difference between a tubal and a hyster, and explain why I had to have this hyster.

3) I'm going to leave some extra folders at the x-ray departement (I've already called Juan, the office manager at the department, who I've seen countless times in the past few months, he agreed to help me with this). I told him that when the folders run out he can call me to bring in more. I asked him to give them to anyone who's considering a hyster.

4) I'm going to speak to the head of the department to request that baby pictures not be posted in the ultrasound room. I know that new mothers-to-be and happy to see baby pictures...but since this test is used for more than baby pitures (in utero) it's highly insensitive to display these photos of newborns. It made me aware of what I would always be missing...that chance to see my baby grow inside me. I am happy to adopt, but I did have dreams to give birth to my husband's baby...and it hurts my heart to miss that experience.

5) I'm going to seek out the GYN's in our health plan (in this area) and pass out the folders (mentioned earlier). I've been doing this same approach with Pancreatic Cancer since the deaths of my father and my Uncle from this cancer. (I work with the Pancreatic Cancer Action Network). Most doctors appreciate info to pass on to their patients.

So...that's my plan. This tech upset me, but I'm going to use that energy to make a difference and not to just sit and be angry.

Thank you all for helping me see what I can do to change this around and to not just sit and be hurt. I'd like to prevent some other sister from having this happen to her.

Thanks ladies!

PS Linda, I had the CT scan with contrast done a couple of weeks ago, and then the surgeon requests the ultrasound. I'm with you...I've had ultrasounds that never showed the mess going on inside, so I'm not sure why he thought I needed that U/S when I had already had the CT scan. Seems like that would show what he needed to see. Hmmmmm. The CT scan showed something 'strange' next to my ovary, but the surgeon doesn't think it's a cyst. Weird, huh?
  #10  
Unread 01-02-2004, 11:56 AM
I need to vent......

(((Rita))) you go, girl! I love the way you're turning this around to use the energy to benefit others... and that will surely come back around to you!

The strange something they saw next to the ovary...did they consider an abscess? That was what my GYN was thinking at first when they found the diverticulitis. You'd have intense pain, symptoms of infection? Just a thought. I sure hope you get some answers soon.

s,
-Linda
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