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Fighting with ex husband Fighting with ex husband

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Unread 01-25-2004, 03:01 PM
Fighting with ex husband

Girl...I am dying here right now. That is too funny!!! I haven't seen a lick of child support from my oldest child's...uhhh...what's the word I'm looking for....donor. $200 a month x 12 months would be $2400 for a year. $2400 x 13 years would be $31,200. That's what it would be to bring it to his birthday last year.

That's okay though. We don't need the money and it's not like he even accept my oldest as his even though there was a DNA test to prove my son is his.

Late this year or next we are going to draw up the legal papers to have my DH adopt DS. That is who raised him from 23 months to now. That should be fun since we'll have to show proof that we "tried" to look for the donor. UGH!
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Unread 01-25-2004, 09:07 PM
Fighting with ex husband

Does OK add on interest? They do here in Arizona so I know that the $17,000.00 he owes does NOT include the interest!!!!!!!! I have offered him several times that if he would terminate his rights I would write off ALL of the current and past due child support.....WOW what a deal he could give himself a $449 a month raise to go toward his "NEW" life, he says no. But that ok for now because from what I understand in 2 sshort years when my son is 12 he can make a decision and the courts will listen and at that time ALL bets are OFFFFFFFFF!!!!!!!!! He loses.....SUCKER!
The little girls mother said she would also waive past due support so between the two of the kids that would be about $1,000.00 raise a month just for signing a piece of paper with a pen that I would gladly provide!
Unread 01-26-2004, 07:34 AM
Fighting with ex husband

I honestly don't know if OK does interest or not. My child support papers come from CA (my home state) and I know they do interest. Not to mention jail time, etc. The funny thing about CA is that he could sign the paper give all his parental rights to me, BUT the courts could still press him for child support. We'd both have to petition the courts to drop the child support. I'm having serious doubts I could even find him. Which is fine by me. Then the adoption could go through smoothly and I wouldn't have to worry about him trying to barrage into my son's life when he doesn't even know him. I know eventually I'll have to explain this to DS, but it's the last thing I want to do. He knows that dad (DH) wasn't there at the beginning of his life and he's asked about that, but I'm kinda shoved it off to the side until he's older and will understand more.
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Unread 01-26-2004, 09:52 AM
Fighting with ex husband

It so hard to the parent to a child when the other parent walks out without leaving any explanationwhy. At least thats the case over here. I wish that I could go back and change the past and have his rights terminated 6 years ago in Az if they are gone for 6 months without support or visitation you can terminate on the fact of abandoment. I just figured he was gone and I didn't know where he was so I figured leave it alone and don't drag my son through all of the courts questions and therapists drill. But you know what 6 years later and is that not what's happening now ANYWAY?!:hair:
Unread 01-26-2004, 07:07 PM
Fighting with ex husband

It is hard, but I was lucky. DS's donor didn't want to have anything to do with us. That made it so much easier. I lived at home so the only one I had to really tell (besides mom) was dad. That was harder then anything in the world. The disappointed look from him was enough to have me avoid him for months even though we lived in the same house.

I'll have to look into the abandonment here. We've been here 9 1/2 years and I guess that makes us residents now. LOL!

I bet once they start really tacting on all the child support payments your son's father has to pay he'll be looking for a way out.
Unread 01-27-2004, 01:08 PM
Fighting with ex husband

Gosh I hope you're right! I can't stand to think about himtaking my son next month for the 5 hour visit! My son is very upset about it and we even talked about it last night for a little bit and he's not happy, he said he wasn't going to stay with him for 5 hours only 1 and then walk home if he has to. He won't know which way to go but that was a very interesting comment any way.
Unread 01-27-2004, 02:05 PM
Fighting with ex husband

WOW! I don't blame him for not wanting to be with his father for 5 hours. Are you worried that he'll try and take your son? ~Shudder~
Unread 01-27-2004, 03:23 PM
Fighting with ex husband

Well...........I am and I'm not. I am because right before the divorce he would say things like "If I can't have you noone else will", and "I will take him from you and you'll never find him!" So of course that kind of thing stays in your mind. The only reason I'm not is because he does live an hour and a half away and it is court ordered that he ( my son) stay in our county. My ex lives in a different county. So I think if my ex has any brain what so ever he would not leave the city limits with him. BUT there's always that BIG BUT! You always hear or read crazy stories about the scorned ex that does horrible things to the kids. I don't even want to think about that!
When we go back to court in April the judge said that he would decide then IF my ex could take him up to his house, but those visits in May, June asnd July are 7 hours and he would have to spend at least 3 hours of the 7 in a car to go up and come back down !? So that's fun! NOT! My son is very very upset about these ones and we try not to talk about them because they might not happen.CROSS YOUR FINGERS!
Unread 01-27-2004, 04:39 PM
Fighting with ex husband

Oh man! One of ~those~ ex's. I had a few of those before I got married in '92. Thankfully boyfriends can be dumped. It's harder with a husband.

Hopefully the home visits won't happen. It is creepy hearing all the bad things. I don't know what I would do if DS's donor would walk into our lives.

I have my fingers crossed.
Unread 01-27-2004, 07:23 PM
Fighting with ex husband

You know if I knew then what I know now..........I would have without a doubt terminated his rights in a heart beat!
You know if you are serious about terminating his right you might want to do it before he shows up at your front door like my ex eek!
Ex husbands and ex boyfriends

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