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Scared  of having surgery! Scared of having surgery!

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Unread 10-23-2000, 06:59 AM
Scared of having surgery!

Hi I am new here. Been reading posts daily. Finally got the nerve to write. I am 28 years old and have had problems since i gave birth to my son 7 years ago. Found out I have endometrosis. Have pain daily, It is like it is part of my life now.I have a period 24 out of 28 days. For the 24 days it is unbeleivable. I feel like I am gonna bleed to death. For the other 4 days I have black discharge.They put me on the pill. But it that didn't work so they gave me depo shots. It wouldn't stop me from bleeding so they doubled my dose on that. I had no such luck with it. I have went to 3 different gyno's. I swear they use me like guinea pigs. I have had a d/c and lapo. I went one week after having the d/c without the period then it came back and it is here to stay. I finally found an excellent doctor. I wish I would of found him sooner. He said he can't beleive the other doctors didn't say anything about getting a hysto done. I wanted to have one more child. But i can't go on with this pain and bleeding non-stop. I can't even go to the store and back with out going through my clothes.I am so bloated all the time. Feels like i am going to have a baby. LOL He said i had to have some bleeding times done and stuff first before he scheduled the hysto. I have had the tests done. They come back on November 3. I will know when i will have it done then. I just hate waiting around. I don't want to be laid up During december at all. I babysit for children all day. How long do I have to have there parents find a new babysitter for. They have to be picked up all the time. None of them walk yet. I haven't even started christmas shopping. There are so many things i want to ask you all. He said when I have the surgery they will be doing abdominal. He said he really would like to save my ovaries but with cysts on them all the time. What is the sense? My husband has been very patient about it all. I haven't had sex with him in about 7 months. I have in pain and if I have sex then I bleed more. I just can't wait to get all fixed and have a normal life again. Can someone please help me through this waiting and wondering time.
Christine from PA.
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Unread 10-23-2000, 07:53 AM
I'm there also.

Christine, I totally understand what you're feeling. Although I'm older than you, I was told this summer by the reg. nurse practitioner, who did my pap, that I had stage two uterine prolapse and would need a hysterectomy. For some personal reasons, I waited to call the doctor's office and make the appointment to see him. One month later, I finally get the nerve up to call and find I have to wait 6 weeks to get in to see him.

Now I'm scheduled for November 9th and scared to death. Even though I have a prescription for panic attacks, I hate to take it since it knocks me out instead of calming me down. So here I am this morning, after getting all of 2 hours and 43 minutes of sleep last night. I stretched out last night and just started to cry.

As for your babysitting, I don't know how you're going to be able to do that. If you have all small children, and they need picking up, that's going to be hard. My post-op instructions, which I've already received, said that I can't pick up anything over 10 pounds for 6 weeks.

If you don't want to be laid up during December, you can talk with your doctor and delay your surgery until after the holidays. Only you and he can make that decision.

I've already done my shopping for my family and plan on spending my "down" time getting Christmas cards done and out, on time, this year.

Right now, my concern is more with Thanksgiving. I'll be exactly two weeks post-op on that day, so I can't cook. Whether or not I feel up to going out, or having one of my adult kids cook, remains to be seen.

Everybody tells me that the waiting is the hardest and I can vouch that this is true. I'm stressing big time and nothing seems to help.

Please drop in here often. You might be able to find the help and support you need.
Unread 10-23-2000, 08:05 AM
Don't be afraid - be informed

I'm afraid too but we have to be strong.

My story is much different from yours but the outcome is about the same abdominal hysto on Nov. 1st.

I guess I've always had problems but chose to ignore them.
I'm so afraid of the medical field. I don't know why. Just the idea of people cutting on me. People I don't hardly know.

Anyway, I started having major problems right after I got married or it may have been right before around 1986/1987.
I had an infection in both ovaries and when they took me to the hospital they gave me almost straight penicillin and that's when we found out I was allergic to penicillin.
After I cleared up from all that mess they did a lapo to make sure my insides weren't scared from the infection.
They found scar tissue which was connecting my fallopian tubes to the bowel. (GROSS!!!) They also ran dye through my tubes to make sure that was okay and suggested the best thing to help me with the pain would be to get pregnant so everything would stretch. Oh PLEASE! 1990 I had my first child - c-section of course, because I had a tilted uterus and my bones were shaped like a V instead of curved like most people. Excuse me, how did I get so messed up? Things were never really the same after baby #1, then came along ds in 1994 (Another c-section). I got in shape after I had him. Started walking daily, lost 20 pounds.
Feeling great but still not right. My periods started being weird. I'd be heavy for 2 days and then nothing for 4 and then medium for another 4. So now instead of a 5 day normal heavy to light - it's drug out over 10 days and I don't know if I'm having it or I'm not. But I think that is much better than bleeding all the time - you poor darlin!

Anyway, about three years ago I noticed a little pea sized bump in my abdomin. I went to my general doctor and asked him about it. I even asked because of the location - do you think I need to see my OB/GYN - he said no it's either an infected insect bite or a blocked fat cell. 3 months later I went to my OB/GYN and it was about the size of a ping pong ball. He said it was endometiosis and it needed to come out. By this time I had quit work and our insurance didn't pay for outpatient surgery. It only hurt during that time of the month and it wasn't growing anymore so I ignored it. I was in denial. Here we are three years later, it's about the size of a golf ball and due to the endometiosis and all the other problems I've had they've given me three options, do a scope get the mass taken out and probably be back in in a year or so because of the endometriosis, do an abdominal hysto which should prevent the endo from coming back and get rid of the bump and get rid of that time of the month and get rid of the migraines (if all this is true - who wouldn't want to get it done?)or do the ab hysto and some other operation to do with the bladder so I won't have to get up during the night to go to the bathroom. I'm going the whole nine yards.

We hadn't planned on having anymore kids anyway but it was very depressing for me because even though we said we weren't going to have anymore this is so final.

But looking at your e-mail and remembering what my dh (he's so sweet) told me if we change our minds we can always adopt. There are so many little ones out there who need loving homes and we've been so blessed with our two. And you have been blessed with one. I guess it makes it harder because my sil is expecting her 5th in January and everyone is busy planning a baby shower.

But we will get through this. I do understand about being scared. It's the not knowing that fuels the fear. Read as much as you can. This list is a great source. As is the library. I skimmed through three books and now I have a general idea of what they're going to do to me. Better than going in blind.

Also, listen to a relax tape several times a day if you can. I know it feels so 60's but it really helps!

Best of luck to you. Know that we're praying for you.

I'm good at listening so if you'd like to send me an e-mail offlist I'm at [email protected]

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Unread 10-23-2000, 10:52 AM
Scared of having surgery!

Everything you are feeling we have all felt pre-op. Waiting is the hardest part, once your day comes, you will be amazed at the days that follow, how much better you feel about things.
Try not to worry too much and believe that once you have your surgery, you will be getting your life back. NO more body dictating when you can plan vacations, when you can have sex, or when you can schedule daily activities.

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