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Unread 07-02-2004, 01:43 PM

Hi everyone,

am 3 1/2 weeks post op and up until now I thought I was doing pretty well emotionally, in fact I cant say I have had any feelings at all!!.

That has now changed and I can feel all the anxietys building up and I am starting to feel sorry for myself.

Let rip at my DH on the phone. We had already agreed that he would not come home for the surgery but I ended up being upset because as my husband he should have been there for me. I know that was unfair but thats how I felt.

I feel old, lonely and insecure now and I really have no right to feel that way as I have had so many wonderful people around me loving me and caring for me.

I'm sorry to be such a wimp, maybe I'm just tired
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Unread 07-02-2004, 02:18 PM

Awwww Pauline, you are not being a wimp!

Looks like everything is just "catching up" with you. - I would have done the EXACT same thing with my DH. Agreed that he didn't have to come home, but secretly hoping that he would take the incentive to come home on his own. Men just don't get it!

Did they remove your ovaries? or not? If they did, are you on HRT? - If they didn't, your ovaries still go into a shock and takes a little while to start working correctly post-op.

Hang in there! You are still VERY early post hyst! Sometimes I don't know what we women expect. Why do we have to be Superwoman?!?!? Well.....we don't!!!! We deserve to feel sorry for ourselves sometimes....we deserve a good cry....we deserve to be pampered....oh I could go on and on!

You take care of yourself! And know that you have a lot of Sisters here rooting for you!
Unread 07-02-2004, 02:38 PM

Hi, Pauline -

I'm just a few days behind you, and woke up yesterday feeling REALLY down, when I'd been doing so great since surgery - I think the only time I've cried is when DSO and I had a fight. Prior to surgery, I was an emotional basketcase, crying some days for hours on end. I notice that you had a BSO as well. I think maybe, just maybe those menopausal symptoms are finally catching up with us - what do you think??

I'm going to look into some of the natural alternatives.

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Unread 07-02-2004, 03:01 PM


I think we have all experienced those days and it is quite natural. Take some time to pamper yourself a little more than usual. I would have felt the exact same way you did regarding the husband scenario. Take deep breaths, smile, and know that you have a lot of sisters wishing you well.
Unread 07-02-2004, 06:10 PM

thank you sisters, it makes a difference knowing you are there.

Don't have ovaries now and I don't know what is going to happen with HRT as I had severe endo and have been told I need to wait a while before starting HRT.

Will discuss it with GP when I see her next week.

I am also getting a heavy ache in the bladder area, It also takes a long time to wee and although the ache eases then it soon comes back.

Went to see Shrek 2 this evening, that made me laugh, but I still feel guilty about DH and wish I didn't feel like this.

Having you all here is great though, thanks. XX
Unread 07-02-2004, 07:53 PM

Pauline, My surgery date was the same as yours. I am also feeling a little down. I think mine is due to boredom. I can't wait to get back to work. I have never been the stay at home kind of person. I am feeling great otherwise. I am going to try to get the dr to let me go back part time when I see her next week.

Good luck and keep your chin up.

Unread 07-03-2004, 06:43 AM

Hi, Pauline -

I had posted on another thread that I still had bladder pain (3 weeks post), and one of the sisters encouraged me to go to the doc. Guess What? I've got a UTI. A slight one, but I am hoping the antibiotics will clear up the pain as well.

The nurse said that after the hyst, a UTI will not feel like a "normal" UTI - I think this is a post-op thing? But I had no burning in the uretera, so I just thought it was from surgery.

So, if you don't feel better by Monday, I'd encourage you to call the doc. OR go to an Urgent Care clinic to be tested and get antibiotics - shouldnt' wait too long on these things (do they have those in the UK?)

Unread 07-03-2004, 06:53 AM
Im feeling low too

Hi Pauline, well we do seem like sisters dont we.

I was feeling really good like you for a couple of days then late last night after having that all day sit a thon which is all my fault I know (though DH seems to feel it should be his fault but heaven knows why), I feel quite low and unmotivated.

As you say its like it has all caught up with me, like I have been pretending nothing has happened and today it all has!

Maybe it is lack of sleep as didnt sleep that well last night. I am sorry that you had a row with your DH and hope that you can talk to him again soon as you shouldnt let any bad feelings lie.

I just feel like I have been run over by a steam train today. Bummer.

Big hugs to you


Unread 07-03-2004, 07:04 AM
Hang in there!

Hey Pauline,

I am so sorry that everything's catching you now. I am having some of the same problems from time to time. My dh had to peel me off the ceiling when the bill from the hospital came...Yeouch! I have been sorta spassed out since then! If you ever want to chat, just drop me a PM. I lurk a lot on the boards and have read some of your posts and replies. You are so sweet!

Things that I do to help relieve the lonliness and anxiety:
1.) Visit HysterSisters
2.) Take a nice warm shower and do my hair nicely.
3.) After the shower, put on really comfy PJ's
4.) Order out your favorite delivery food. We have had pizza and Japanese. The Japanese place doesn't even deliver usually. They were so sweet because dh and I are pretty regular customers. Our kids love the traditional food and of course chopsticks! Put out candles and have a candlelight dinner.
5.) Get a relaxation tape and listen to it while lying on a few extra pillows in bed.
6.) Get a massage. There are therapists who work with post-op patients and will only work on areas you want (head, neck, shoulders, feet, legs, back -- if they have a massage chair)
7.) Breathe. Take one minute to sit completely still, no noise and just take 10 deep breaths with your eyes closed. Center yourself. It's so calming and it's free!

I hope that you try some, if not all, of these. They can really help! I know that you visit the website...I hope you like the others, too.

Take care,
Unread 07-03-2004, 10:07 AM

you are all so wonderful, thank you. I am definately going to see the doc Monday about the possible UTI and possible HRT alternatives just incase all this spontanious impatience and sensitivity is down to that.

Thank you all for being so understanding. Think I'm going to cry again

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