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What about anal sex????? What about anal sex?????

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  #11  
Unread 11-20-2004, 10:58 AM
Sex!!

Hi Ladies

I'm always amazed by these posts about sex. What's going on here. I mean I love sex - but woow - this is wrong. What is it with these men!!! Can't they WAIT!! How would they feel if they had had their insides taken out. Goodness they only have to have a cold and my what a whinger they become.

I must have a very understanding - rare even - DH he has never pressurised me - ever - before surgery and definitely not after to have sexual intercourse (penetrative sex) with him unless I wanted to. He has a very rare (I think) - from reading lots of posts on the subject of sex on this webiste - attitude towards women and their needs. OK so he's rubbish in the kitchen - but he makes up for this in so many other ways. I feel very lucky to have him from what I read. You ladies out there whose husbands or boyfriends CAN'T WAIT you should tell them to get a life.

As for anal sex well bm's alone caused me unbearable pain, the very thought of having something stuck up there brings tears to my eyes when I remember how I used to scream in agony whilst pooing, I think my next door neighbours thought I was giving birth.

Sorry to sound off here but it makes me very angry that you ladies do not stand up for yourselves against these men it is almost bullying in my mind, because you feel the need to even ask the question about when you can have sex of any kind when the doctor has already told you - it's a shame that these MEN can't sit in on the operation and see for themselves just what you have gone through then they might not be so stupid and worst still selfish. Tell him to use his hand !!!!! I'm sure they have had enough practice of that over the years - cause that's what I think they are.

A very upset Linnij XX
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  #12  
Unread 11-20-2004, 02:56 PM
What about anal sex?????

All men who have ladies on this website should be required to sit down at their respective computers and go the PELVICFLOOR.COM website.

There they can view actual color photos of various pelvic surgeries, including: rectocele repairs, vaginal hysterectomies, and the old stand-by, the TAH.

Then we can ask them, "How's that for an aphrodisiac?"
  #13  
Unread 11-20-2004, 03:25 PM
What about anal sex?????

I would lose respect for any man who would put his own needs before my health , What is wrong with some men?? Isn't a loving relationship all about mutual love and respect for each other ,physically, emotionally and spiritually??? My DH is a bit "too" the other way, he's a little scared says he wouldn't won't to hurt me , Whatever happened to showing love in other ways ??? Who doesn't love to be just hugged and be close???
Goodluck Ladies , don't get me wrong sex is a very big part of relationships but isn't a good marriage or partnership more than just that???
Wendygai
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  #14  
Unread 11-20-2004, 03:30 PM
What about anal sex?????

You can call me a prude if you want, but even when I'm well, some places on MY body are EXITS not entrances and that happens to be one of them!

Happy Healing to All!
  #15  
Unread 11-20-2004, 07:07 PM
What about anal sex?????

Nice one Bertie!!! Very eloquently put!

My thoughts exactly!
  #16  
Unread 11-21-2004, 01:39 AM
What about anal sex?????

  Quote:
Originally posted by bertie
You can call me a prude if you want, but even when I'm well, some places on MY body are EXITS not entrances and that happens to be one of them!

Happy Healing to All!
I totally agree with you, but I could not find the word EXIT ONLY.

To many pain pills I think.

Later

Cheryl
  #17  
Unread 11-21-2004, 06:34 AM
What about anal sex?????

To quote simply my husband who knows there is to be no sex for 6 weeks...."There's nothing wrong with your mouth"
Sorry about the crudity...but just think...I have to live with it!

Keep it all closed and wrested.

3weeks post op and no princess stories in sight!
  #18  
Unread 11-21-2004, 08:34 AM
I should have added to my above post.

My hubby was joking around when he said it. He is always trying to be the comedian.

He's been pretty good actually. He has been great with the kids, horrible with the house though. He just doesn't see things the way that I do and things don't bother him. Hence why I hired a cleaning service!
  #19  
Unread 11-21-2004, 08:48 AM
What about anal sex?????

  Quote:
Originally posted by Shibaowner
All men who have ladies on this website should be required to sit down at their respective computers and go the PELVICFLOOR.COM website.

There they can view actual color photos of various pelvic surgeries, including: rectocele repairs, vaginal hysterectomies, and the old stand-by, the TAH.

Then we can ask them, "How's that for an aphrodisiac?"
I haven't had my surgery yet, but sat my DH down and showed him that site. I'm having a LAVH so I showed him the TVH pictures. I thought he was going to LOL. I figure I'll show him those pics at regular intervals and when he's feeling "frisky" so he'll keep in mind why it's such a NO NO!! If nothing else when he's feeling "frisky" it should at least put him out of the mood!!
  #20  
Unread 11-21-2004, 09:32 AM
What about anal sex?????

While my BF has been a pain in the nether regions for the most part of my recovery, the one thing he didn't bother me about was sex.
He just asked the other night (at 5 weeks) when I thought we'd be able to have sex again and I told him the doctor would likely let me know Monday (tomorrow) when I go in for my check-up.

We did, however, end up going ahead and having intercourse last night....because I initiated it.

We've experimented with anal intercourse during our relationship, although it's been well over a year since the last time. I had much the same attitude about it before as many of you do. I even discussed it with my doctor.

At that time, I was still considering it and the docs comment made me laugh:
Just because the playground is next to the dump, doesn't mean you should play with the trash.

We don't make a habit out of it (as I said, it's been well over a year), but we do occasionally engage and I've not had any ill effects from it at all.
However, I have to agree that there's a very thin membrane of tissue separating the two areas and the potential to cause damage should be something you consider very strongly, as well as discuss with your doctor, before you try.
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