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Another upsetting day Another upsetting day

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Unread 01-14-2005, 07:15 PM
Another upsetting day

Today started out calmly. I was feeling better after a round of doubts and second guessing over facing a hysterectomy.

Then the doctor's office called to confirm pre-op appointment. I began to visibly shake and the fear factor attacked me again.

At work a lady found out about my surgery and proceeded to ask if I knew about the latest treatments for heavy bleeding. She was assuming that she knew what my problem is. The trouble is, I don't know for sure what all is going on inside of me. The doctor won't know until surgery.

How do I know if I'm doing the right thing? I'm not suffering all the time. But it is my understanding that adenomyosis eventually leads to hysterectomy. My doctor has suspected endometriosis in the past. There is a family history of fibroids. My uterus is too big for a TVH. If I wait, won't matters just get worse. I'm done having children. My doctor has known me for 20+ years. He doesn't just jump into things for no reason. My family has a history of these problems and it has always led to TAH or worse.

Has anyone waited or postponed surgery only to end up having it later anyway? Even though you didn't have great pain all the time, were the problems worse than suspected?

I'm not excited about having life-changing surgery, but I don't want things to get worse either. Please share your thoughts with me. Thank you!

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Unread 01-14-2005, 07:28 PM
Another upsetting day

Cinderellen, I believe everyone second guesses their decision. My fibroid had been with me for years but small not causing any problems. Then for a year I experienced bleeding between periods, spotting regularly etc. I thought I was just perimenopausal. Last summer at my regular check up the doc ordered an ultrasound stating it had grown quite a bit. At the time it turned out to be about the size of a lemon. She suggested a TAH then, I said "no". In November I had another ultrasound the sucker was the size of an orange. Again she suggested a TAH although she was good to inform me of other alternatives. She wanted to do surgery Dec 1 2004, again I said "no" not really suffering and I don't want to be down for the holidays. She came back with Jan 5 2005 and I said ok. Up until my pre-op the day before surgery I was hoping the darn thing would suddenly shrink, even stated so to the doc that day. She said "no, it's the size of a grapefruit now". I had my TAH/BSO 1/5/05 and they found a large fibroid, a polyp and cysts on both ovaries. All in all, I'm happy with my decision now. I'll get my path reports on Wednesday. Curious to see what that says.
Like everyone says, the waiting is the hardest part along with the uncertainty that awaits us after. No one can predict that and no two people are alike.
Find peace with your decision that you are doing whats right for you and things will be ok.
Unread 01-14-2005, 07:45 PM
Another upsetting day

Hi Cinder - I'm also scheduled for TAH on 1/24. I have my pre-op appt next Tuesday, and at this point I'm looking forward to getting this over with. I have 2 fibroids the size of canteloupes...had I not waited so long, maybe I could've taken another route surgically, but with the pain I'm in, I'm more than ready to start recovering!

I had an ultrasound Nov 03, doc said "oh, you just have fibroids"...well, went for my PAP Nov 04 and she almost couldn't do it because my fibroids were so big, they were covering my cervix! I had no symptoms, until after the 2nd ultrasound Nov 04...That's when everything went downhill, and I'm glad I didn't ignore it.

I'm sure I'll be nervous wreck next week, but this site has been such a great education and comfort! Hope your surgery goes well, and we'll be posting on the "other" side very soon!

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Unread 01-15-2005, 01:14 AM
Another upsetting day

Like you I had many doubts and many anxieties over this 'life changing' surgery. I had a hyster in August after a lifetime of problems and it is the best thing I ever did!!! I feel SO liberated!!! Im finally free of all the hassles and worries and healthwise I have never felt better. No longer is my life controlled by my periods and all the aches pains and bleeding that came with that.
My partner and I say its like a new era. We are free to do what we want, when we want. No more changes of plans because of my 'probs'. No more lost wages due to feeling too sick/in pain/ bleeding heavily etc.
Im not saying it is for everyone, but for me it was the answer to my prayers.
Hang in there.
Luv and best wishes for the strength you need to move forward.
Unread 01-15-2005, 06:06 AM
Another upsetting day

I doubt there's rarely a woman out there that at some point prior to hyster surgery wondered if it "really" "had" to be done. It's a very scarey and disconcerning surgery! The problem we all face is that, even with all the sophsicated testing they can do now, the doctors just don't really know what's going on inside until they get there.

Try to look at this way; if your having an ongoing problem then you know there is something in there that is not right and is diseased. Who knows what all is going on you don't know! If having children (or more children) is no longer an issue, then better to just have it all taken care of and get healthy again! You get to move on with life as new and healthy person and with each organ removed is one less cancer risk later in life!

Something that was of great encouragement to me is how almost every woman comes back here to say it was the best decision they ever made!
Unread 01-15-2005, 06:57 AM
Another upsetting day

Hi, if you're really having second thoughts, please take the time to talk with your dr about them. This is a major surgery and I think that you should be as comfortable as possible with your decision. Look at all your options, weigh the pros and cons and make the decision that is best for you.

I didn't really have much of a choice as I had precancerous uterine tumors. I am not happy that I needed a hyst but I do feel that it was the right thing to do.

Best wishes, you'll be in my thoughts and prayers.

Unread 01-15-2005, 07:19 AM
Another upsetting day

I too have had my concerns but as I am getting closer (1/25/05) I know that this is the best decision for me. I have been in pain for 13 years off and on. *hugs* it's gonna be ok. talk to your doctor about it.
Unread 01-15-2005, 10:22 AM
Thank you "Sisters!"

This is Cinderellen!

Thanks so much for the encouraging words! I'm really anxious to talk to my doctor on Tuesday. I know I will feel better about things after that.

I have been encouraged by a couple of other people on the phone last night. They said I will be happy about getting on with a healthier life, also. They're still the same people, and HRT is beginning to work for both of them. Hurray!

Best wishes to all of you. Thanks a bunch for responding!


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