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I need help on making a decision I need help on making a decision

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Unread 03-16-2005, 08:19 PM
I need help on making a decision

Hello everybody

I need some advice and wonder what I should do. I feel so stressed out at the moment.
I am supposed to return to work at my regular duties Monday.I work as a aide in a mental hospital. I had the rectocele/enterocele repair 7 weeks ago.I've had 3 surgeries in less than 9 months. I have been having abdominal pain lately and don't know if I am up to working on the floor. I am supposed to work two weeks, then go off again for a tvt surgery. My body is telling me to cancel the surgery. The stress incontinence is not bad at this point. I don't even get any urine on my panties.I just wanted to have the tvt and get it done with. Now I am not so sure.
My job offers light duty for up to 90 days after returning from surgery. Do you think it is unreasonable for me to call the urologist's office and cancel the tvt? I could call my gyn and ask him to fill out papers for me to go on light duty for a while.He said a couple times a few weeks ago he would be glad to fill the papers out, but now it is so close to my return date.I may be cutting it too close for him.I don't even know if he will be in the office Thursday or Friday.I should have made this decision sooner.
Any suggestions on what I should do would be greatly appreciated.
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Unread 03-16-2005, 08:44 PM
I need help on making a decision

Oh, mtdewpeg!!

I can feel your anxiety through your typed words....you are stressing over the decision whether or not to have the tvt. IMO, when we have to make a decision this important & we experience such a high level of anxiety, then it's time to cancel the surgery. I would have the dr. put you on light duty (and no, it's not to late to get that done). You said you aren't leaking any urine onto your undergarments...that's a good thing, that issue can be dealt with further down the road. I know you are having abdominal pain & perhaps finding the source of your pain is something you should consider chasing down. I so feel for you...these decisions aren't easy to make, but it sounds like this impending surgery is putting way to much stress on you mentally/emotionally .. go with your INSTINCTS..my priest once told me that one of Gods greatest gifts to women was their ability to be very instinctive. YOUR instincts are telling to to hold off on this surgery. My prayers for you, that the decision you make will give you peace & comfort ...please feel free to pm me anytime.
Unread 03-17-2005, 01:30 AM
I need help on making a decision

Hi Peggy,
I wish I had the right answer for you, but I know that you will do what's best for you. I know your under alot of pressure right now and you have to chose wisely as to what to do, so take your time and think it about it. Were you having it done due to leaking or other reasons? I know I could live with just leaking, but I need to have mine repaired again because it's down right painful to have my bladder saging and putting pessure on my other oragans. As long as it's not interfering with the quality of your life right now you might want to put it off. Again, it's your body and you have every right to my the decision, not your Dr.'s. Here is a big((((((HUG))))) to help you!
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Unread 03-17-2005, 05:04 AM
I need help on making a decision

Hello. I leak when I bend and I feel something poking on top. I don't like that sensation, especially when I am at work. My vagina feels all wet and sometimes it gets irritating.I have quite a physical job at times. I have a small cystocele, which I don't want to need a anterior repair in the future.My gyn told me a few weeks ago a tvt could very well support the bladder neck and prevent the prolapse from becoming worse. The urologist says my bladder is swaying quite a bit when he checked me when I coughed.Something is not too stable.That is when he said he would do the tvt. I don't think he would have offered so quickly if I wasn't a candidate.
The urologist first mentioned the biofeedback, but I personally don't want to go through that. With my anxiety my muscles would always be stressed,so I don't need them telling me to relax and charging me the big bucks.My anxiety clears up once I am back to a normal everyday life.
I have already told my boss and personel I would be going back off, so no worry there. They told me to take care of my health. I hadn't slept well for the last few nights and I felt overwhelmed yesterday. I had a very good night sleep lastnight and feel ok with having it done. I think staying up too late and not getting the rest I need really contributes to my anxiety.
I will see how I feel about this by Friday and go from there. I don't want to make a decision I will regret.
The kids are leaving for school, so it is back to bed for me.
Unread 03-17-2005, 06:05 AM

Hi Peggy,
I just sent you a lengthy PM. I wouldn't rush into any surgery after my last A&P repair. I honestly am having lots of problems since I had the repairs. I also have a wet vaginal feeling. No urine on panties, but something wet vaginally. I had the cystogram, the IVP, and also did the pyridium tampon test to show no fistula that can be detected. It's been suggested that since my urine sprays backwards without sitting forward on the potty and spreading the labia that I am having what is called urinary reflux up the vagina. Wow, that's worse than the cystocele was!! I don't think I am leaking out the urethra. I just have a wet vaginal feel. Especially, after I urinate. I am seeing a urologist, but I am not sure anything can be done at this point. I was told to give it at least six months after trying intercourse and see if the vaginal opening would "stretch" out some and the GYN said he has seen these problems repair themselves. This isn't the GYN that did the surgery... I changed as I wasn't getting any answers from him. It's been eight weeks since the A&P procedure and DH and I tried intercourse and it was painful and also he couldn't penetrate all the way. This GYN said some of it is due to the surgery making things tighter and he honestly feels that I shouldn't have any surgery until I am absolutely sure what is actually going on. I understand your anxiety as I am having it as well. There isn't enough Xanax in the world to help me right now! LOL You aren't alone on that! Take your time, don't have surgery until you know what you really want to do. I feel like I never should have had this last one. Take care, Annie
Unread 03-17-2005, 07:43 AM
I need help on making a decision


I wanted to encourage you to listen to your inner voice. You should ask for light duty and you should not be hesitant to ask your doctor. Its not late notice .... how are you supposed to know in advance how you would feel today??? Give yourself a break, dear!! Please make that call to your doc and get the ball rolling on the light duty orders.

Big for you. If you are not ready for surgery ... then wait until you are.

Take care and let us know how we can help!
Unread 03-17-2005, 09:08 AM
I need help on making a decision

Hi sisters and thanks for all of your kindness.
I think I am going to make that call to cancel my surgery. My body has been telling me it isn't ready to go through anymore surgeries. Once it is cancelled I may get some relief from this stress.
I'll be seeing my gyn for my well woman's visit later in the summer. I'll have him check the cystocele and see if it is the same or worse. If it would need repaired in the near future I could always arrange for the urologist to be there and do the tvt then. It would be a combined surgery.I don't want to keep having one surgery after another. It isn't good on the body.If the cystocele isn't worse, but my leaking is, then I could go ahead and reaschedule the tvt.
Thanks for all of your advice and support.

s and more s
Unread 03-17-2005, 11:39 AM
I need help on making a decision

I am back again. I just called and cancelled my surgery. I feel so relieved. I think I am doing the right thing for now. The lady had me leave a message on the ladies answering machine who schedules biofeedback. She will call me tomorrow. I may not like the biofeedback part, but the electrical stimulation may be what I need for my nerves and muscles down there. They feel weak and dead! LOL. They will also help me learn how to do the kegels correctly. I hope my insurance covers it.
I also called work to let them know I won't be going out in two weeks. My supervisor was happy of course. She said my unit hasn't been right without me. LOLThat made me feel good. She also said I don't have to be doing any heavy lifting and breaking up fights. There are men and campus police around the corner from my unit who can do it.
I AM LOOKING SO FORWARD TO RETURNING TO WORK !I never thought I would miss it that much.
I feel like a big burden has been lifted off of my shoulders.

Unread 03-17-2005, 01:29 PM
I need help on making a decision

Hello mtdewpeg,

I am so happy for you...you know you have made the right decision when you get that "burden off my shoulders" feeling!!!
I am equally as happy to hear that you are going to give the biofeedback a try. That just might be what you need! Through all the tumoil in making a decision, when we go with our instincts it always works out...we sometimes just need alittle support, imput and time to think everything out. Please keep us posted on how you are doing & the biofeedback. I'm off to the dr. for my 1st post-op after all those repairs...I would like to think that I will escape without a pelvic exam, but I don't think I'll get that lucky..especially since I'm still bleeding...what a very long, long road. Take care of yourself!
Unread 03-17-2005, 07:05 PM
I need help on making a decision

Hi Peggy,
I'm so happy for you! I knew if you had the chance to calm down and think, that you would know what your body needs right now. I'm proud of you. Take it easy at work next week.

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