Are you emotionally attached to your uterus?

The doctor's office called and scheduled my surgery for May 17th, but wants me in the hospital on May 16th. (I have Lupus, asthma and other health problems) How in the world they are going to get that approved is beyond me. This should be interesting. But I am happy to have a date....27 more days of peeing every 30 minutes, struggling to have a BM and the pain and pressure is getting worse and worse. I will be glad to get this done. I really thought getting a surgery date would freak me out, but I am still very, very calm.

As yet, I have no emotions associated with my uterus. Perhaps because I never was pregnant and never had children. First, I raised my siblings and was already burned out by my twenties. I always used birth control. Then I was married and sadly came to understand my husband was not someone I wanted to raise my children. I developed Lupus, had to divorce because my husband cruelly could never accept me being ill. By that time, the doctors recommended I not become pregnant due to my illnesses and the medications I had to take to stay alive.

Fortunately, I later married a wonderful, loving man, who spent last night reading a book on hysterectomy. Bless his heart. But still, I feel no sense of loss or deprivation, just peace and contentment. Perhaps its because I'm older, 46.

Now, having said that, watch me fall apart one week before my surgery. Hey, that will be ok too. As long as we are all in touch with our feelings.

fabricat7:

I've never had an emotional connection to my uterus. I know some women say it "gave" them their children, but to me it was just the physical place in my body where the fetus developed, no more or no less important than my heart and lungs that provided them with oxygen. And as far as having it out is concerned, it's like having an inflamed appendix - it's gotta go!

You sound like you're emotionally in the 'right' place to do this. Glad you found a guy who can give you the support you deserve.

HollyK

I am not sure about the whole emotional aspect of this surgery. I imagine it would be a much more emotional situation for me if I had never had children. And I do understand the sentiment of the uterus being the place where your children came into being and were first nurtured by you. I had a couple of odd pregnancy/childbirth dreams when I first started planning for my TAH. Overall, though, I am not sad to be losing my uterus. I guess like others here, most of the concerns I have about this surgery center around the recovery process and worries about potential bad outcomes. But, at this point, being comfortable with my decision, I won't allow fear of the unknown to rule me between now and my surgery date.

I have about as much attachment to my uterus as I had to my gallbladder. I don't miss that thing and I'm not going to miss my uterus. It has nothing to do with me being who I am or me being a woman. It's just another body part gone bad. Good riddance!

My and I were never on friendly terms, I guess. I was miserable through my periods as a teenager. The problems subsided for a while after the birth of my children in my twenties. But, as things gradually became less pleasant over the last few years, I took a hard look at the fact that I'm in my mid 40's and how my quality of life was being affected by this dysfunction.

Now, a year later, I feel nothing but relief. I don't have to plan vacations around "that week" of every month. I don't have to carry a change of clothes in my car "just in case". I don't have to sleep on a towel. I'm not influencing the Gross National Product thru my investment in feminine products - nor am I carting around half a box of pads in my car, tucking them in my desk drawers, carrying huge handbags so I have room for supplies or clipping endless coupons in search of the "the" product that truly would offer full protection from accidents. I can wear khaki pants on Casual Friday and not worry.

So, I suppose I had an "emotional" attachment, it just wasn't in the spectrum of POSITIVE! I once actually put a post-it note on my master bathroom mirror that read:

Dear Aunt Flo,

DROP DEAD!

No kids, and still no attachment to uterus (in fact, i'm feeling quite DE-tached from it as of March )

I feel VERY lucky about that because I can't imagine having to go through the surgery PLUS have all of that other emotional stuff to deal with too. My heart goes out to those who have to go through that.

Fro-yo

I am older (51) and never had children. I figured that I would not want any at this point in my life (at least not little babies). I thought I wouldn't have any emotional attachment to my uterus, but as my surgery date got very close, I did feel a little twinge of -- not exactly sadness, but something. After my surgery I did have a difficult time, but I think that was for a number of reasons. For one thing, I went into instant menopause and my emotions were pretty close to the surface. For another thing, I realized that I had really had a very important part of my body removed. I had had my period every month for 38 years, and, it seems odd, but I kind of do miss it even though I'm also glad it is done.

I don't regret my hysterectomy and I don't mope around about it, but I do realize it was a major event in my life. Any major change -- even change for the good -- can be traumatic. I will say that I miss my ovaries. I didn't realize how well they were still working until they were gone. These hot flashes are pretty miserable, but I guess I'm learning to live with them a little better.

Good luck to you. I hope everything goes smoothly and that you have an uneventful recovery. Let us know how it goes.
Michaelat

A few people I've told about my hyst have said, "Oh, I'm sorry to hear that." I always answer, "I'm not sorry. My uterus has never given me anything but pain and I wasn't using it anyway, so I'm not sad it's gone..."

I too am happy I didn't have to go through the emotional turmoil that some women do when they have a hyst. I was so happy.

The only emotion I can think of is ELATION!!!!!!!!!!!! GOOD-BYE!

I am almost 6 weeks post-op and not missing that body part one little bit!


Good luck with your surgery - the waiting is the hardest part.

All I can say is soooo long!

I have lived with 27 years of pain.

I am emotional and cry but they are tears of joy and relief that I will have a life ahead of me with no more periods, no more pain, no more getting looks of disbelief when I describe the hell I have been through and hearing over and over..... (you look healthy, you are only 30)


So you are in good company in your thoughts and feelings.