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I'm going for surgery, but he's the one who's worried... I'm going for surgery, but he's the one who's worried...

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Unread 04-25-2005, 06:39 AM
I'm going for surgery, but he's the one who's worried...

Okay, ladies... I have a question for those of you who might have gone through this, or are about to!

My sweetie confided last night that he's having real issues with my surgery. He's done some research, to see what it's all about, and he says that now he's got all these horrible pictures in his head about the things that can go wrong. He's so very worried that he's going to lose me to some stupid mistake the doctor could make, or some horrible internal problem that no one can foresee.

How do I reassure him, without getting freaked out myself???

We're both really looking forward to me being healthy again, so it's not like we don't want this to happen. And he seemed to be fine, up until last week.

He's been so wonderful, and still is, but now he's getting a little clingy (which is fine, since I'm getting that way too), and he is getting more and more agitated as the date gets closer.

Any advice?

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Unread 04-25-2005, 06:54 AM
I'm going for surgery, but he's the one who's worried...

Hi, I think that it's great that your DH cares enough to try to learn about what you're facing. Maybe you could tell him about the Mister Hyster Sister here. There's a ton of helpful info and hints there.

Best wishes, your DH sounds like a real "keeper"

Unread 04-25-2005, 10:07 AM
I'm going for surgery, but he's the one who's worried...

Reassurance and more reassurance! My DH was horribly worried and clingy. He kept saying "You can cancel if you're not comfortable!" I think he worked himself into an ulcer. He started having stomach trouble and I believe it is from the stress. Also, take your sweetheart with you to your pre-op appointments, and let him ask the questions that are bothering him. I was amazed when my DH remembered to tell the doctor that I had a heart murmur and was allergic to shellfish. He had obviously been thinking of all that could go wrong too, but by taking him with me he was able to ask the questions and hear the answers in person. Good luck!
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Unread 04-25-2005, 11:47 AM
I'm going for surgery, but he's the one who's worried...

Thanks, Jeanus and faithnu...

I've pointed him at Mister Hyster Sisters, and I think he's been reading those, as well. Not sure, but I've definitely told him about it!

He went with me to the doc appointment where we decided between ablation and hyster, and he asked some good questions, and reminded the doc that I'm allergic to latex, which is wonderful. I'd completely forgotten that I needed to tell them that!

Now he's coming up wiht all this stuff that he reminds me to ask/tell the anesthesiologist when I see them on the 28th. I think I'll ask him tonight if he wants to go to that one, as well.

It's very sweet that he cares this much (not that that was ever in question!), I just worry for him. He's got high blood pressure and stomach issues already, that he takes meds for. I'd hate for either condition to get worse because of this.

I think this last week is going to kill us! LOL


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